Get

In Your Inbox

Catster is reader-supported. When you buy via links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission at no cost to you. Learn more.

How to Make Your Cat a Lap Cat: 6 Tips & Tricks

cat sitting on owners lap

Nothing beats having a sleeping cat curled up on your lap while you enjoy a television show or sit by a roaring fire. However, not all cats are “lap cats,” so it may take some work to get them to feel comfortable as your snuggle buddy.

If you want to turn your cat into a lap cat, here are some tips to help things go smoothly.

divider cat paws 2 oct 2024

Before You Start: Supplies You’ll Need

  • Treats
  • A comfortable chair or couch
  • No distractions for you!

divider cat paws 2 oct 2024

The 6 Tips to Help Make Your Cat a Lap Cat

1. Create a Secure Environment

woman-feeding-cats
Image Credit: Dora Zett, Shutterstock

Cats need to feel safe to relax. If your home is chaotic and a source of stress, your cat may not feel confident sleeping deeply on your lap instead of in a secure hiding spot. This is especially true in multi-cat households.

Consider your home environment and whether you could do more to provide structure and security. Do you need more cat perches or hiding places to help your cat feel safe? Are there conflicts between cats that create stress? These things can impact whether your cat feels secure enough to relax with you or anywhere in your home.


2. Be a Source of Calm

If you want your cat to settle on your lap, you need to be in a calm spot. If you’re constantly getting up, reaching for your phone, or fidgeting, that doesn’t help an insecure cat feel safe. Keep your voice soft if you’re using your phone or talking to others in the room. Turn off notifications on your phone so you’re not startling your cat with sudden loud noises.

Keep in mind that your past behaviors may have affected your cat’s being around you. For example, if you’ve scolded your cat or swatted them away for coming up on the couch or climbing onto your lap when it wasn’t a good time for you, they may not understand that it’s acceptable to do it now. Be consistent in your interactions and try to build positive associations.


3. Offer Rewards

himalayan cat eating treat
Image Credit: Piqsels

If your cat is particularly standoffish or uncomfortable, it may take some time, patience, and bribery to get them on your lap. Keep a supply of treats on you and toss them on the floor. If your cat goes for them, toss a treat on the couch. Work on getting your cat closer and closer until they’re on your lap.

Avoid touching your cat during this exercise. If your cat isn’t sure, the last thing they want is to be forced into cuddling. Let them feel like they have complete freedom to come to you or leave as they choose.


4. Read Body Language

Cat body language can be difficult to interpret. It’s easy to assume a cat coming up to you wants petting, but that’s not always the case. Your cat may be asking for food or wanting to play, not looking for a cuddle session.

If your cat settles on your lap and displays behaviors like meowing, skin twitching, tail flicking, or shifting ears, they may be irritated. This could be because you’ve started petting them when they didn’t want to, which can quickly turn into petting-induced aggression and a reluctance to lay on your lap in the future.


5. Don’t Take Advantage of the Opportunity

young-woman-with-ragdoll-cat-on-couch_rock-the-stock_Shutterstock-e1670249749656
Image Credit: rock the stock, Shutterstock

If you’re trying to convince your cat that your lap is safe and secure, don’t take advantage of that trust by using it as an opportunity to do something unpleasant like trimming nails, brushing, or giving medication. That’s a good way to ensure that your cat doesn’t feel safe snuggling with you in the future.


6. Let It Be Your Cat’s Idea

Cats can be independent and willful. Let everything, from your cat coming to you to choosing when to leave, be their idea. Don’t initiate petting if your cat isn’t asking for it, and never restrain your cat in that position. Let them know that they can come and go as they wish, which will make them feel safe coming back when they want to.

Even if you only get a short time with your cat in your lap, consider it a blessing and make it positive. You may find that your cat lays on you more and more each time.

divider cat paws 2 oct 2024

Why Don’t All Cats Like Cuddling?

Genetics play a role in how much your cat likes to snuggle. Kittens that come from friendly parents may be more inclined to curl up on your lap, while others are more aloof and prefer some distance.

Socialization, which should occur between two and seven weeks of age, is important for kittens. Regular handling during this period builds trust and improves the likelihood of them being social adults.

Still, just like people, some cats just aren’t the most affectionate. It may not be how you want your cat to behave, but it’s best to just enjoy the unique way your cat shows their love and affection.

divider cat paws 2 oct 2024

Conclusion

Some cats are naturally affectionate and want to be planted on their owner’s lap. If yours isn’t, you can encourage that behavior using these tips to make it a positive, relaxing experience and, more importantly, always your cat’s idea. With time and patience, your cat may become so attached that they jump to your lap every time you sit down.


Featured Image Credit: Pixel-Shot, Shutterstock

Want content like this delivered to you?

Sign Up For Our Newsletter

News, insights, expert advice, and everything cat

* By submitting, you agree to our Terms & Conditions and Privacy & Cookies Policy.

How useful was this post?

Click on a star to rate (you can leave written feedback after clicking submit)

Help us improve Catster for pet parents!

Your feedback really matters.

What did you like about this post? Also how can we improve it?

Join the conversation

Leave a Reply

You’re very welcome to leave a comment or question. Please know that all comments must meet our community guidelines, and your email address will NOT be published. Let’s have a positive and constructive conversation.

Talk With A Vet Online

Peace of mind,
anywhere, anytime

Affordable vet advice

Is a Tuxedo Cat Hypoallergenic? Vet-Approved Allergy Care Tips

If you’re a cat lover, you’ve most likely seen, or perhaps owned, a tuxedo cat. While many people think these adorable black and...

When Can I Let My Kitten Roam the House? Vet-Approved Info & 4 Safety Tips

Kittens are curious creatures that like to explore and get into mischief. Letting a kitten roam free in the house can be a...

How Cats Improve Your Mood: Olga’s Ways of Relieving My Stress

Hi, I’m Christopher! Read my introduction to learn more about me and my silly Russian Blue cat, Olga. Researchers have studied how cats...

How to Take a Road Trip With a Cat: 10 Vet-Reviewed Tips

It’s hard enough for cat owners to get their pets inside their carriers and to the vet for an annual check-up, let alone...

More related

How to Stay the Same for 10 Million Years – A Cat’s Guide to Evolutionary Success (and Domination)

From baby faces to slicing teeth. Perfection isn’t just genetic – it’s a lifestyle. By Lucifer Fluffovich (as told to his mum, Kirsti...

Meditating With Your Cat: Benefits & How-To Guide

Meditation is an activity that practices mindfulness, often allowing for a sense of mental clarity or emotional stability. This practice usually involves sitting...

Why Do Cats Pounce? Feline Instinctive Behavior Explained (Vet-Reviewed)

Have you ever watched your cat bound around the house, seemingly jumping on random things? You may have wondered why they do it....

Ask Dr. Paola – Fighting, Sneezing & Fried Chicken (January 13, 2025)

Welcome to our “Ask Dr. Paola” series, where every Monday we bring expert advice straight from Dr. Paola Cuevas (MVZ) to help our...

Keep reading

Why Do Cats Like Ice Cubes? 5 Vet-Reviewed Reasons

If you give ice cubes to your cats, you may be surprised by how much they like playing with them, nibbling on them, and chasing them around. There are many theories as to why cats like ice cubes. Some people...

Gray persian cat is licking ice to cool off

Why Do Cats Show You Their Butt? 6 Vet-Reviewed Reasons

Although cats have lived with humans for millennia, they still do many things that leave us feeling puzzled or confused. One behavior that can surprise or shock new cat owners is a cat’s tendency to show their butt when they...

black cat enjoying when owner scratch at the base of his tail showing the butt

Can Cats Share a Litter Box? Vet-Reviewed FAQ & Tips

Although cat litter trays are an unglamorous side of cat parenting, these items are more than just a bathroom for cats, as they also act as sacred spots and private retirement places for kitties. For this reason, the short answer...

multiple kittens in a litter box

Are Cat Cafés Good or Bad for Cats? Vet Reviewed Guidelines

Any cat lover would be attracted to the idea of visiting a cat café, where they can make new furry friends while sipping their favorite coffee. While it sounds like a fantastic idea, and the popularity of cat cafés is...

cat cafe in thailand

Why Do I Need to Clean My Cat’s Litter Box? 10 Vet Reviewed Reasons & Cleaning Tips

As a cat owner, you know that cleaning the litter box is definitely the least pleasant chore associated with caring for your feline friend. However, keeping your cat’s litter box clean is also one of the most important things you...

cat-pooping-outside-the-litter-box

When Do Kittens Open Their Eyes? Vet-Reviewed Facts & FAQ

Did you know that kittens are born deaf and blind? In fact, newborn kittens enter the world with their eyes entirely shut, and they don’t open their eyes until they are 1-2 weeks old. In this article, we will discuss...

Snowshoe Lynx Point Siamese kittens

Why Does My Cat Throw Up After Eating? 8 Vet-Reviewed Reasons & Solutions

If your cat starts throwing up after they eat, it’s obviously very alarming behavior that you want to get to the bottom of as soon as possible. But what exactly could be the cause of your kitty’s stomach issues? Vomiting...

sick cat vomiting the food on a white background

Can CBD Help a Cat With Anxiety? Exploring Alternatives

There have been no scientific studies that investigate the impact cannabis has on pets, but many pet parents are turning to it for help with their cat’s anxiety. And yes, it does work. When considering CBD for your pet, the...

Man giving CBD oil to a cat