Get

In Your Inbox

Catster is reader-supported. When you buy via links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission at no cost to you. Learn more.

Why Does My Cat Sleep With Me and Not My Husband? 6 Likely Reasons

cat sleeping on bed

Often, our cat’s behaviors can seem strange. One point of confusion is often the places our cats try to sleep. They seem to sleep in the oddest places and may prefer to sleep with only one person. They may even leave the bed when another person lies down, even if the person they sleep with is still in the bed.

Usually, this is interpreted as favoritism towards a particular person. However, it is often more complicated than that. Cats choose their sleeping places for a variety of reasons. Often, it has nothing to do with how much they like or don’t like a person.

Here are some reasons why your feline may choose to sleep with one person over the other.

divider cat faces oct 2024

 

Why Does My Cat Sleep With Me and Not My Husband

1. Warmth

Cats often choose to sleep in warm places. This often fuels their odd sleeping positions more than some other factors. For example, they may sleep underneath a couch to be close to an air vent or on top of a table to be in the sun. Either way, warmth is a driving factor.

If it’s colder, this may even be more of a factor. If most places in your home are on the colder side, your cat will have to work extra hard to find warm sleeping spots. They can’t just use a blanket like us.

It is possible that you are warmer than your husband, making you a more acceptable sleeping spot. Furthermore, even if you aren’t actually warmer, you may sleep in a position that allows the cat to find a warmer spot, while your husband may not provide many spots that are warm. For example, cats often like to sleep between legs because they are significantly warmer than other sleeping areas.


2. Comfort

You may also simply sleep in positions that are more comfortable for your feline. For example, perhaps you sleep on your back, allowing your feline to sleep on your stomach. Your husband may sleep in a position that makes it more difficult for your cat to get comfortable, which makes them sleep with you instead.

Sometimes, it is the small things that affect whether or not your cat sleeps with you or someone else. For example, your cat may decide to sleep with you solely for the angle you keep your foot at. If your cat obviously shows favoritism towards one person, it could be something small that you might not even notice.

cat on woman owners lap
Image By: Impact Photography, Shutterstock

3. Companionship

Sometimes, it is true that cats simply sleep with someone because they like them. While cats are solitary creatures when compared to dogs, hundreds of years of domestication have made them decently affectionate. If they prefer one person over the other, they will likely want to sleep with that person as well.

This is especially true if they get pets when they are cuddling.


4. Scent

Your cat might favor your natural scent, or the scent of your perfume, shampoo, or lotion, over your partner’s. Cats have a very strong sense of smell. Additionally, if your partner wears a strong fragrance, your cat might not like it.

Those caring for anxious cats understand the struggles and discomfort that their companions feel on a daily basis. The innovative bowl shape of the Hepper Nest Bed provides nervous pets with support and its high sides offer a sense of security, diminishing stress and worry. To learn about how to the Hepper Nest can provide solace to your cat, click here.

Hepper Cat Nest Bed
  • HAPPY COZY CATS - Your kitty will bask in luxurious sherpa-lined comfort while feeling warm, safe,...
  • MODERN DESIGN - Contemporary styling with upholstered fabric construction; just like your human...
  • WARM FLEECE LINER - Self warming, thick sherpa fleece with microfiber trim.

At Catster, we’ve admired Hepper for many years and decided to take a controlling ownership interest so that we could benefit from the outstanding designs of this cool cat company!


5. Territorial

Some cats are simply one-person cats. They pick one person that they love, and then they stick with them for the foreseeable future. This is especially true if the cats were raised around one person, as they may become attuned to that person’s affection. Some cats are naturally more territorial of their people than others.

The breed can affect this somewhat. Some cat breeds are simply one-person breeds and are therefore more likely to choose one person’s affection over another.


6. Habit

Some cats simply begin sleeping with one person for some reason, and then it becomes a habit. Cats are creatures of habit, just like humans. If they start out their days in your home only sleeping with you, that is likely how it will continue unless something makes them change that habit.

Cats typically won’t change unless they’re forced to.

A young teen girl naps on the couch, hugging her cat
Image By: Simone Hogan, Shutterstock

divider cat faces 2 oct 2024

Can I Change My Cat’s Sleeping Habits?

All habits can be changed. If your husband wishes the cat showed him more affection, he needs to take time out of his day for that affection to take place. He’ll need to connect with the cat at their level, which may be through petting, playing, or a whole host of things.

It is vital to note that following a cat around the house or forcing yourself on them can be interpreted as aggression. The husband should wait for the cat to come to him. Try grabbing a toy and moving it around instead of attempting to cuddle.


Featured Image Credit: Adam Kuylenstierna, Unsplash

How useful was this post?

Click on a star to rate (you can leave written feedback after clicking submit)

Help us improve Catster for pet parents!

Your feedback really matters.

What did you like about this post? Also how can we improve it?

Join the conversation

Leave a Reply

You’re very welcome to leave a comment or question. Please know that all comments must meet our community guidelines, and your email address will NOT be published. Let’s have a positive and constructive conversation.

Talk With A Vet Online

Peace of mind,
anywhere, anytime

Affordable vet advice

Are Bombay Cats Rare? Uniqueness & Recognition Facts

The Bombay cat is a rare feline that looks like a tiny black panther. However, they are domesticated cats and have no wildness...

Will Ignoring My Cat Make Them Like Me? Here’s How They’ll Respond (Vet-Verified Info)

While cats are fun, some cats may also appear as aloof and independent. Sometimes, we wish they liked us more, which may be...

Persian Kittens for Sale in Indiana: Breeders List 2025

Catster advocates for adopting before shopping, though we fully understand there are many reasons for seeking a breeder. So, we encourage it to...

Why Do Cats Loaf? 5 Vet-Reviewed Reasons

The “loaf” position has become quite popular on social media. If you own a cat, you’ve likely seen your cat in this position....

More related

How to Keep Your Cat Calm & Safe This Fourth of July: 12 Common Methods

As a cat owner, you know that your feline friend is no fonder of fireworks than dogs are, and they can get just...

Cats’ Experience With Leash Training: Adventures, Challenges & More

I previously introduced you to Laura Kicey, a graphic designer, illustrator, photographer, and artist living in the Philadelphia suburbs with her partner and...

Does Steam Cleaning Kill Fleas? Vet-Approved Effectiveness & Safety Explored

If your cat has fleas and they’ve also infested your home, we feel your pain. If you’re contemplating reaching for the phone to...

Can Online Vets Prescribe Antibiotics? Our Vet Explains the Facts & Legality

Consulting an online veterinarian is convenient and less stressful for your pet. However, if you suspect your cat has an infection and needs...

Keep reading

How Much CBD Oil Should I Give My Cat for Anxiety? Optimal Dosing Chart

CBD has exploded in popularity recently, being touted as a miracle cure for a wide range of ailments that’s supposedly a more natural alternative to many pharmaceuticals. But CBD isn’t just for people. More and more CBD products are being...

cbd oil and cat on background

Why Does My Cat Eat Tape? 6 Vet-Reviewed Reasons & What to Do

‘Tis the night before Christmas and all through the house—there’s a disturbing crunching noise coming from underneath the tree, where you find your feline crunching on the tape from the wrapped presents! You’re probably puzzled because you feed your cat...

scotch tape

Cat Poop Chart: Colors, Consistency & More (Vet-Reviewed)

We all know cleaning the litter box is an unpleasant but crucial part of pet ownership. You don’t want to spend more time around your cat’s waste than you have to, but as you’re cleaning the box, it’s worth taking...

Tabby cat sitting in a litter box and look to the camera

Can Cats Eat Honey? Vet-Reviewed Facts & FAQ

If you love eating honey yourself, you probably know that it has antibacterial properties and is packed full of antioxidants and vitamins. It’s good for us humans, but does that mean it could be good for our cats too? So...

Can Cats Eat Honey

Can Cats Eat Granola? Vet-Verified Nutritional Facts & Advice

Sometimes, for whatever reason, cats take a liking to human foods. This can be both cute and worrying at the same time. In the case of granola—which is made of oats—it isn’t dangerous in itself, but it is still best...

Can Cats Eat Granola

How to Tell if Your Cat Is Underweight: Vet-Reviewed Signs to Look For

Feeding your cat a healthy diet that will ensure they stay at an appropriate weight is crucial. However, you might be doing exactly that, but your cat is still shedding the pounds. If you suspect your cat is losing weight...

Skinny cat

Can a Cat Get Pregnant if She’s Not in Heat (What You Need to Know!)

If your cat has not been spayed, you may be concerned that you’ll soon have to deal with a pregnant mother and, eventually, a litter of kittens. When your cat is in heat, she’s at risk of getting pregnant, but...

beautiful pregnant cat

How Long Do Savannah Cats Live? Average Lifespan, Data & Care

Savannah cats are beautiful hybrid spotted cats with long legs and distinctive, large ears. The hind legs are usually just a bit longer than the front legs in this breed, giving them a distinctive silhouette and gait. Savannahs are a...

Cat Savannah F1 sitting on the stairs