September 18th 2010 8:25 am
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Sept 19th izza da OhFishYul day for THINK LIKE A PIRATE and all around da world everyone izza thinking of Johnny Depp. So weeza gonna Pawty Like A Pirate all week long. Get yur fun loving self over to this Pawty Forum page and be ready to Yo Ho Hozatini and not walk da gang plank! I hears da Pirates had Catibbean Meatballs too!
Ahoyzalini meowster mates! HERE IZZA DA PAWTY FORUM LINK FUR DA FUN
September 7th 2010 8:36 am
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If youza curious as a cat to know what not-so-heatlhy Flea & Tick purroducts izza sitting on yur shelf, ready to be used on youza, then youza gonna wanna read this week's GUIDO GAZETTE cuz it's eye opening fur shure. My Envirocat self izza on my soapbox, MY NACHURAL SOAPBOX So get yur paws over to The Guido Gazette and then toss out da toxic stuff.. Phew, weeza never knows whatza we is gonna learn next.
Now go and have a CATZOWEY day!
September 5th 2010 6:40 pm
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Catzowey itza da Labor Day weekend here in da YouEssHay and weeza got our 2-legged Staff and Family members all home cuzza all da offices is closed fur da Labor Day weekend. Shuksatini, datsa means no Posties in da mail, no checking my checking account but free parking in San Franfuncisco!
Me and Myself has instructed my Staff to labor over me on Labor Day, since theyza not working, they'za all home with us. So I purrclaim Labor Day as the purrfecto day fur we furs to be labored over - meowsaged, fed extra tiddy bitties, told howza cute we izza more than normal, hear some extra "ohhh and ahhhs" and youza know, just get labored over on Labor Day.
Wishing youza da purrfecto Labor Day on Monday & Mille Meowster Grazie fur sending yur fabuloso Labor Day speshule zealies with da terrificat meowsages. Youza all warming my heart so so so much and The Guido Gazette explains my feelings about FURIENDS ... datsa YOUza and YURza!
Ciao & Meow!
August 21st 2010 8:48 am
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Finally me and myself izza healthy and said Arrividerci & Bye Bye Baby to dat dreaded respurratory infekshun Me, Myself and little brofur Yolo got. Weeza finally back to brofur wrestling today even though weeza both in da lighter divisions cuz weeza lost 1-1/2 lbs each being inFURmed. Being so sick and weak wazn't fun at all, but I came tooza life when I saw dat Vet signore walk into da room with da Thermometer - upza and outza I went!
So weeza healthy but our MasterCat cards got meowxed out cuz da Vets izza greedy purrsons and charged enuf to fly us to Roma and back FURst class, and then theyza misdiagnosed brofur Yolo. Shuksatini! But weeza healthy meowsters now. WOWza MEOWza life is catzowey!
Mille Meowster Grazie to all of youza fine feline furiends and our pooch pals too who sent da caring gifties and meowvalous healing wishes! Purrahps itza time to celebrate Furiends and good health - letza have a Meatballs Pawty! Name da date and letza celebrate!
August 13th 2010 8:28 am
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Itza da furst and da one and only FurEyeDay da 13th in all of 2010 so be shure youza enjoys thizza day today. Nobody knows exacticatically who invented da FurEyeDay da 13th but one thing is fur shure, itza always gonna be around.
Here's some suggestions fur youza today:
Smile cuz if youza mad youza gonna blame it on being FurEyeDay da 13th
Watch where youza purrrowls in da house - and look up up up on da shelf so nothing falls on yur head cuz then youza gonna blame it on being FurEyeDay da 13th.
Tell yur pawrent exacticatically what youza wants fur dinner. If youza leaves it up to them, then youza gets something inFURior and youza gonna blame it on being FurEyeDay da 13th.
Don't step on any of da sidewalk cracks cuz there da rumor dat it can break da back - whooza youza gonna blame dat on? Da guy who invented da FurEyeDay da 13th!
So Happy Felice FurEyeDay da 13th - be safe, be smartzatini and make it a nonCATastrophic purrfecto day!
August 8th 2010 3:29 pm
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Today me and my paws goes in da Downtown taxi to dat darned creepzatini Vet - had to accompany little brofur Yolo cuz heeza got da kitty cold & his wheezing and sneezing. I duzn't got da kitty cold or hot furlashes so, notza clear on why I hadda go too. Wellza I tells ya - the meeter and greeter comes to pick me up out of momma's arms and take me behind closed doors and then the fun begans.
Now youza all knows I goes to cocktail pawties, funraisers, to my job, rides da bus and climbs da San Franfuncisco hills on da Cable Car and never ever have I hissed. Wellza, I tells ya, I had a hiss attack cuz I missed Momma (sheeza sitting in da recepshun room with Yolo). Yep uh huh I hissed and showed my fangs, then I hissed like my great Uncle Bengal in Africa and the Vet got pale as clean litter and fainted! Yep uh huh heeza flat on da floor and I'ma standing over him like da hunter with his catch. I picked up dat needle heeza gonna give me da shot with and then I hissed and hissed more and said "you wanna have a shotzatini?"
Faster than da pizza cooks, in comes da Vet Tech and rescues da Vet and they grabs me to give me my FRP shot. WOWza MEOWza I'ma still hissing but when they takes me out to Momma in da recepshun room, I'ma purring. Theyza thinks I got a twin in the carrier cuz no pawsible way one meowster izza gonna have da split purrsonality!
As iffa datza not enuf stuff, then he announces that I'm FAT FAT FAT and gotza cut out my Innova and Evo dried food! Holy Cannoli, I'ma purraying he slips on da floor with one of my speshule EyeTailYun meatzaballs placed directacatically under his Vet shoes!
August 1st 2010 12:16 pm
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Catzowey! I gotza 3 invatayshuns frumza speshule furiends tagging me so I'ma gonna Tag a long here with me and myself and let youza in on some of my well keptza secrets. Even da Papurrrrazzi duzn't know thizza things. Shhhh dontcha tell!
1. Do you ever wake your parent up in the night?
ABSOLUTICATICALLY! I sits on Momma's Up and Down bird feather pillow so I can confurm sheeza sleeping really well and then bam! I wakes her up to be shure sheeza still breathing! Itza cuz I'ma on Momma Purrtrol - keeping her safe all night.
2.Do you ever tear up things?
ME and MYSELF TEARS UPPPA da Hollywood contract to be in Tarzan mewvie cuz I wazn't interested in trotting thru da hoomidity filled jungly jungle.
3.What's your favorite treat?
MINI EYETAILYUN MEATBALLS marinated in impurrted Nip sauce. Ahhh basta pasta theyza the bestest.
4.Can you fetch something when ask to do so?
NOPE, my Staff fetches cuz itza in their job descripshun!
5.Have you ever lived any place other than where you live ?
FABULOSO QUESHUN: sure I lives in Meowlano Italy sometimes, then I jets over to da Canary Islands fur fun sun and da giganticat white sand litter box beach. But, my favorite place to live izza San Franfuncisco in CalEyeFurKneeYah.
Shhhhh dontcha tell thizza infurmayshun to nobody else - itza only fur yur preshus molto meowvalous cat eyes! I wishes youza da mostest funtasticat week!
July 6th 2010 3:12 pm
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Catzowey furs! My furiends need a temporaricat place to call home till their family gets back on track. If youza can help or knows someone near Orlando Florida, canza youza contact Tigger or Cali? Da clock izza going tickety tockety and weeza can help - I knows fur shure weeza can help.
Here's Tigger's Page and hizza Diary has da FORUM post also. Mille Meowster Grazie frumza my heart!
ANDZA here's da FORUMS page weeza started for them - theyza marvelous meowsters in need so sPURRRRRead da word furiends!
July 2nd 2010 5:28 pm
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Four score and many paws ago, oopsatini! Datsa not correctacat! Lemme start again....ahem - Our pawsative fore fathers brought furth their paws on this land ... OOPSatini again! Me and Myself izza confused bout Indapendacat Day, cuz I'ma EyeTailYun and in Roma we don't have da 4th of July. Well, we duz have it but it's just the day after the 3rd of July.
I thinks itza meowvalous idea fur we meowsters to know exactacatically why weeza all dressed up in da Red Whites and da Blues and weeza not feeling da blues, cuz weeza feeling sparkling!
Historicatically speaking, the 4th of July izza exacticatically the Day thatza YouEssHay adopted The DeckKlawRayshun of Independacats - yep uh huh itza true, in 1776 and even us with da 9 lives wazn't born then. And that document says everybody gotza Barbeque ribbies & burgers, make da lemonade drinks, consume da watery melons and spit da seeds out and go "Ohhh Ahhhh Ohhhh Ahhhh" when theyza looking up up up in da sky at da Fireworks show.
Wishing youza a Grilly Great 4th of July!
June 23rd 2010 8:18 pm
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WOWza MEOWza didja see da YouEssHay win dat game today? ANDza youza gonna wanna be watching my EyeTailYun soccer studs with the handsome soccer kicking calves on June 24th whenza my meatball loving pals plays Slovakia! Viva EyeTailYa!
I interviewed da Team Meownager and heeza says theyza purrractices with meatballs - yep uh huh, theyza kicksa round da mommas homemade meatballs all over da kitchen floor and thatza how the Team di Italia purrractices kicking da smart moves of da soccer ball. Oh Basta Pasta! Theyza not playing with da meatballs after da sauce izza put on em or they'd be slipping and sliding into da goal net and into da stove and into da frig door too!
Whatcha think if weeza starts a Catster Soccer Team? Meowsters unite fur da fun on da field!