Dear Alfie

When I read Luna and the kittens stories it made me cry. I just cannot imagine how much pain and suffering their Mommy must have gone through. How much guilt she must have experienced since it happened. How many times she must have wished she could turn the clock back.

It is always a terrible thing to lose any animal, but there is something so much more vulnerable about a little defenseless kitten. When you died Alfie I was devastated but I know that nothing could have prevented what happened to you. It was just one of those inexplicable, very sad events which I know that given time I will learn to live with.

What happened to those 5 little babies is a tragedy. Their Mommy had given them so much love and care. I don't know how that place can consider itself to be a shelter. It is an absolute disgrace and it makes me so angry.

If you are reading this diary, please drop by little Luna’s page and leave a comment to let their Mommy know that you are thinking of her and that you care.

http://www.catster.com/cats/1142682

I know that you are being looked after by Moma Ivey and Angel Alfie and I know that you in turn will be looking after Milo, Coco, Luna, Nova, Moonshadow, Weeble, Virgo and all the other kittens that arrive at Rainbow Bridge.

Alfie you will never be forgotten.

I love you sweet baby. Goodnight.

Darling Alfie

Today I have had one of those very tiring, I shouldn't have got out of bed days.

I know you must be really busy at Rainbow Bridge. It seems to me that so many beautiful furbabies die far sooner than they should. It is so very sad.

Alfie I have been reading about 5 beautiful little kittens that went to the Bridge far too early and left their mommy so hurt and very, very sad. I have been reading about little Luna and her siblings, Nova, Moonshadow, Weeble and Virgo. Their story is so sad and made me cry so much.

I know that they are safe at Rainbow Bridge Alfie and I pray that they have been lucky enough to find their very own Moma Ivey and Angel Alfie to look after them.

If you are reading Alfie's diary please pay a visit to Luna's page and read their story. It is so very, very sad.

http://www.catster.com/cats/1142682

To all the beautiful little kittens who have gone to the Bridge before they got a chance of a real life. You are all precious babies who will never be forgotten.

Alfie, my own precious furbaby. I love you. Goodnight.

Beautiful Alfie

The weekends are always the worst. I see you in all your favourite places and I miss you terribly.

I drove back from my sisters today Alfie, she lives 250 miles away so it takes a while. I kept getting ice warnings flashing up on the dashboard, but the drive felt OK and I didn't get stuck in any traffic.

Dad tells me he found some lovely footage of you on the camcorder that he was watching. I haven't seen it yet because I can't bear to look but I will watch it soon. I may post it on Catster for others to watch. I tried to post a little bit of footage of you that was taken by my phone, but the Catster website would not let me upload it so I think it must be in the wrong footage. It's a shame Alfie because it was that lovely time before you came to live with us. You were about 5 weeks old at the vets with all your brothers and sisters and you were chasing a little ball around. It was so much fun watching you.

Dave is missing you Alfie, he is getting along OK, but he looks lonely sometimes. We bought Dave a new bed after you died because we thought he might not miss you so much if he couldn't smell you on the cloth, but I don't think it has made any difference to him. He looks lost in his new bed without you. When the time is right Alfie we might get a new little brother for Dave. I think he needs a new playmate, but it is too soon.

We love you Alfie.

Goodnight.

Dear Alfie

I am staying with my sister for a couple of days which makes writing to you a slow process because I am doing it on my mobile phone.

The vet phoned me today with Dave and Ollie's blood test results. It is the best news Alfie they are not carrying the coronavirus. I was really worried about them Alfie but they are clear. It means you did not catch the virus from them.

You are a sweet and lovely baby boy Alfie. I hope you are showing Milo around Rainbow Bridge and that you are both happy.

Goodnight sweetheart.

Darling Alfied

Oh how I miss you Alfie.

You must be having a busy day today. I know you have had fun today with your beautiful guardian angel Alfie on his Bridge anniversary . I know you have both been playing with a ball of wool today.

Alfie I need you to look after a very special baby. His name is Milo and he is a FIP kitty just like you. Please meet him at Rainbow Bridge and introduce him to Angel Alfie and Moma Ivey. He is about your age and I wonder if you would adopt him into your new family. I am sure Angel Alfie would love to be his guardian and I know Moma Ivey would love to take care of him because she loves little kittens.

I know the pain that Milo's mommy is going through Alfie. It is the most devestating and desperately lonely feeling in the world.

If you are reading this diary entry, please say a prayer for Milo and his family.

http://www.catster.com/cats/1227583

Goodnight sweet babies Alfie and Milo, Angel Alfie and Moma Ivey.

Hi Alfie

Today has been a good day.

It has been a really busy day today at work and it has been the focus of my day. Working such long hours is not good, but I've welcomed it today Alfie because it concentrated my mind on other things.

I am so tired, my brain feels like mush. You are still the first thought on my mind in the morning and the last thought before I go to sleep.

I am healing Alfie and that can only be a good thing.

Be good for Moma Ivey and Angel Alfie.

Goodnight sweetheart. Goodnight.

Dear Alfie

Today has been a better day today.

I have to tell you that Catster people are the best. They have helped me and are continuing to help me with their support. I hope that I can offer some comfort to others when/if it is needed.

They don't know this Alfie, but without all their kindness, support and love I think I would have crumbled. Their words of sympathy and encouragement have been like a cushion which has cradled and comforted me. I am so grateful to each and every one of them.

Alfie I love you so very much. I miss you, we all miss you.

Goodnight Alfie. God bless you.

Dearest Alfie

Yesterday I was taken completely by surprise by the overwhelming sense of grief and loss. Today was a much better day.

At work on my computer screen I have the picture of you and Dave laying together on the sofa. It is the one on your page. When you first died I didn't think I would be able to look at it, but I couldn't bring myself to delete it off. Now I just love to see it.

You were with us for such a short time and yet you became the centre of the household.

We love you and we miss you Alfie, but just for today I have no tears.

Darling little Alfie, Angel Alfie and Moma Ivey, all sweet babies sleep tight.

Darling Alfie

Today has not been a good day.

The tears are flowing again. I thought the pain was easing, but it came back today from nowhere, somewhere, I just don't know.

You were such a sweet baby I just don't understand why you had to be taken. It was so unfair that you never had a chance to live, to grow and to just be.

My darling baby I would give anything if I could just have you back for just a few moments, for one last cuddle. Oh how I wish.

Dad misses you and finds the pain almost unbearable. He is angry, but has nobody to blame and it is hard for him.

Dave came to sleep on our bed on Saturday for the first time since you died. I was cuddling him this morning and he started to purr. It is the first time he has purred since you went away.

We all love you Alfie. If only................

Dear Alfie

Today has had it's ups and downs.

I was very excited when I realised your diary had been awarded Diary of the Day and I wanted to thank everyone from both of us who have been reading and leaving lovely comments. It is they who have offered so much love and support to both of us Alfie.

Then I realised that I had upset someone who I think of as a very caring friend, even though we haven't met and that has left me feeling very sad and selfish. I hope they will forgive me Alfie because I never meant to hurt them. I wouldn't hurt anybody intentionally and I am very, very sorry.

I have been very fortunate in finding this website and have been nurtured very gently back to a normal life after losing you. Alfie you too have been gently led into your 10th life. You were guided to Moma Ivey by Angel Alfie and I know that you have found in him a true guardian angel. I have read all about him and I know that he was meant to be there for you.

Now that you have found your wings, your new mummy, Moma Ivey, and your guardian angel, Alfie, I know that you are safe once more.

Goodnight little sweetheart. Goodnight.