Toby's Diary

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I'm here!

February 16th 2015 10:45 pm
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I had something very important to tell my mum yesterday morning. I found her looking out of the sitting room window, talking to Josie.

"Look at Toby, the mighty hunter," she was saying. "He missed. Good!" Which was rather mean but hang on a mo - how could they be looking at me?

I called her and she looked down.

"Crikey! You got in fast," she said. Then looked out again.

"That's not you. There's another black cat."

That's what I needed to tell her. We all stared at the black cat and he stared back before taking in the size of my well fluffed up tail and he retreated. Can you believe that cheeky cat was hunting in my favourite patch of the garden? He better not come back is all I can say.


Extreme measures

February 15th 2015 10:31 pm
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My mum missed Josie on her lap so has taken extreme measures to get her back. On Saturday there was the normal floomph to let us know the radiators would be warming up but warm up they did not. My mum went to vestigate, much muttering and pressing of buttons but no, the boiler doesn't work.

"We'll have to get the man who goes in the cupboard, complains about how inaccessible it all is and fixes it," I told my mum.

"We'll have to see," said my mum. For now we do have heaters but I don't like them as they are noisy. And Josie said she was cold so she nestled up on mum's lap. I think that was mum's ploy all along!

They settled down to watch a programme called, "Super Cute Furry Animals."

"Ahem!" She has me and Josie, why does she want to watch more other animals?

There were lots of different animals but they saved cats to last as they knew that's what everyone really wanted to see. Apparently we are masters of psychological manipulation. Just one of our many fine qualities.


Serves mum right

February 12th 2015 10:37 pm
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It's bad enough that my mum works all day but she often goes out in the evening too and we are neglected cats.

Last night she came home from work and said, "Yey! I'm not going anywhere tonight. I cannot wait to settle down on that sofa, Josie on my lap, all cosy."

I could see Josie thinking we would see about that.

My mum settled herself down. Josie wandered up and mum patted her legs encouragingly. Josie ignored her and went to sleep on the back of the sofa.

"Come here Poppet," pleaded my mum.

I saw a gleam in Josie's eyes as she went down, stood on mum's lap and then went back to where she had been.

Mum can't just ignore us and expect us to cosy up to us when it suits her.


Josie's new best bed

February 11th 2015 10:44 pm
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It's not just Josie who likes to snuggle under a blanket. In the really dark cold wintry days my mum has been known to watch a film all nestled under a blanket. I say watch - she watches like a cat watches TV. Eyes open the first five minutes to establish the characters and then eyes shut to really savour the vocal performances. And don't quiz us about the plot. We enjoy films in our own way.

Anyway mum's been pretty busy so the blanket she used is all folded up and on the back of the sofa. It's Josie's new favourite place to sleep. She's very good at spotting the best places - it's soft, wide enough to properly curl up on and higher up which always feels safer.

I haven't tried it yet. I still like the pouffe by the radiator best. Nothing beats toasting your tummy.


It came

February 10th 2015 10:53 pm
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Our new fridge arrived yesterday. It came in an enormous box which was brilliant.

"How do I get the fridge out?" my mum asked the man. It was very clearly labelled "Two people handling" rather than "One people and two cat handling" which would have been alright of course.

"It just slides off the top," he said.

It did slide off and then my mum asked, "and how do I get it off the base?" but the man was gone and I was already in our new box so she had to work that one out for herself.

I really wanted to keep the box which was the biggest box I have ever seen. Mum said we have enough boxes and toys cluttering up the place. We do not have enough. There is no such thing as enough when it comes to places to play.

But sadly the box is gone. Mum spent a happy half-hour replacing the fridge-magnet poetry (Cat Lovers edition naturally!) and we're all back to normal which is good.


Still no fridge

February 9th 2015 10:45 pm
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My mum says it's good to go without stuff every now and then so you appreciate it all the more when you get it again.

I have offered to go without Josie for awhile but apparently that's not an option.

When she's not lobbing stuff through our flap mum is keeping everything in our outdoors cupboard. That seems to work but she has developed the feline habit of sniffing everything before she eats it. I am so proud of her!


Mum has gone crazy

February 8th 2015 10:44 pm
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I know this isn't exactly a surprise and we're doing our best for her.

I caught her - and I blush to tell - putting a pint of milk through our magic door. The whole bottle; she wasn't pouring it. She plonked it down in the garden and left it there.

"Shouldn't that live on the fridge?" I asked. I like a drop of milk in the morning so do have an interest in these things.

"The fridge is broken," she told me. "Outside is colder than inside so I thought that would be the best place for the milk."

"And you couldn't be bothered to keep opening the back door so you're using ours?"


A whole load of food had to be thrown away although happily we had just finished up the very last of the Christmas turkey that mum had frozen in pots for us.

Mum spent a happy hour or so on her puter looking for a new one. They have to be quite short and they have to be delivered very soon. This wasn't as easy a task as she had hoped but we do have one coming. Meantime the milk, so essential for the tea that keeps my mum functioning, keeps travelling through our flap.


My mum's shocking revelation

February 5th 2015 10:51 pm
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Mum has been quite busy this week - late being home and she's been working on her Eighty Things List. For Grandpa turns eighty this week and my mum thought that she would put a list in his card of eighty things she is thankful to him for.

She got really stuck at 74 - but did make it.

"Are cats on it?" I asked.

"Twice," she replied. "Once is because he very kindly paid for the glass to be cut to put your original cat flap in and once because he never wanted us to have cats when we were growing up but when Wellington arrived he let him stay."

I've seen pictures of Wellington who was a large, white cat they had when my mum was a little girl. Then my mum said something that shocked me.

"He was only a tiny kitten when we got him and I was terrified of him."

"You? Scared of a kitten?" I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"Back then I was, yes," she said, "I thought cats were all teeth and claws. But after I got used to Wellington - well, I love cats now."

"Mostly me and Josie," I added.

She scritched my back. "I love all cats but yes, especially the ones I get to live with."

Thank goodness for Grandpa letting Wellington stay and turning my mum form cat-fearer to cat-lover.

She would not cope very well without us keeping an eye on her.


I am fed up with Josie

February 4th 2015 10:42 pm
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Does anyone want her? She doesn't eat much and doesn't snore really.

Last night I decided to go under the throw like she does, nestled in a little tent, all snug and cosy. When she does that I leave her be. Did she leave me be? Did she heck! I felt an inquisitive paw pat me so I tapped back and then I got prodded and poked until there was no standing it.

Out I burst and chased her all around the flat.

"You are so cute when you play together," said my mum happily, apparently unaware that this was serious.

All I wanted was a snooze. So I don't want Josie any more.

Oh - actually my mum says she loves Josie so I can't give her away.

"Are you sure?" I asked, "Even though she steals your seat."

"I am sure," said my mum, "I love you both and neither of you are going anywhere."

I suppose that's that then. I'll have to get back at Josie another way.


Josie's Project

February 3rd 2015 10:37 pm
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By the time my mum came home last night all the snow had gone so we went out - but not for long.

"It's still really cold out there," I told my mum who reckons she knew that on account of being the one who has to go out to work in it every day. "I get so bored being stuck in all the time," I sighed, "I wish I had a project like Josie does."

"What project?" asked my mum.

"Hear that noise? That gentle ripping sound?" I asked my mum. We both listened. "That project."

Mum went through to the bedroom where Josie has been patiently working on her hobby - removing the wallpaper frieze that travels round the wall. It's a lengthy task as it goes all round but Josie has been making good progress.

"Josie! No!" said my mum. Josie is assuming this is 'No' like 'No on the kitchen sides' meaning 'not when I can see you'. She's come too far to give up now. How the long winter evenings will fly by. Now what can I be working on??

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