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Toby's Diary

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How we are

June 10th 2014 10:32 pm
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Yesterday was all hot and sunny so when mum came home from work she opened all the doors and windows to cool the flat down. We like doors and windows all open so we can come and go as we please.

Thing is, when you see a cat shaped shape making its way around the curtains from the garden you can't always be sure it's your sisfur. It's best to attack first and ask questions later.

"It's always Josie," said my mum as Josie fought back from my well-timed pounce. But one day it might not be and then how foolish would we feel?!

Josie does the same thing to me. Mum asked if we don't use our excellent scent-detecting abilities or equisite hearing to know it is a family member coming in but it's much more fun our way!!



June 9th 2014 10:33 pm
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Mum was looking at me yesterday and I was looking at her - why was she standing in the kitchen looking at me and not feeding me? Then she slowly blinked.

I kept looking and she said, "Well - that didn't work!"

Turns out the cat programme had said that us cats like a slow blink as it's less threatening than a stare.

Josie wandered in so mum looked at her and blinked again. Now Josie prides herself on her good manners and blinked back.

"Wow" said my mum, and blinked again.

Josie blinked back. And on this went.

"How do we stop this?" asked my mum, after about the eighth time.

"I don't know. You started it," I replied. Awkward!!

If mum hadn't had to go out to her dance class I think they might be standing there still, blinking at each other.


A gift for Josie

June 8th 2014 10:39 pm
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My mum bought Josie a marvellous thing which is called a mattress topper. She said it wasn't for Josie but for her own comfort but who spends the most time on that bed? I rest my case.

Mum got it out of the bag and spread it over the mattress and Josie jumped right up to see how it would feel. Judgement was swift. She rolled on her side and wiggled with an appreciative purr.

"That good huh Josie?" asked my mum but Josie was lost in ecstasy. Mum then tried to put the sheet over it but Josie wouldn't move. I've walked on it and didn't feel like Josie did. I still prefer my armchair but my mum is pretty happy with it too.

It was a sunny warm weekend so I spent most of it outdoors hunting. My mum thinks it's funny to pretend not to recognise me when I come in. It's not. Josie spent most of the weekend enjoying the topper. There's no risk of mum not recognising her!!


Sometimes a cat's gotta..

June 5th 2014 11:13 pm
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Bounce!! You just feel so good to be alive that all that energy just doesn't feel like it fits in your body.

Josie got the bouncy bug this morning. About half-three as it happens.

When this happens she can leap so high she looks like she's flying, over mum's bed and onto mum, and off again - wow!! It was fabulous to watch.

Mum didn't actually get to watch it of course. She had a more participative part in this whole celebration of life.

She didn't look as pleased as you might think.

She sat up blearily and said, "You used to be so sweet, what happened?" but I don't think Josie heard her as she was off.

Mum reckons there are people who shut their cats out at night so they can get a good night's sleep but I'm pretty sure she would miss us too much if she did that so we're safe. I hope.


People ears

June 4th 2014 10:50 pm
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Another thing we learnt from the programme is that my mum has muscles in her ears. She never so much as twitches them so we did not know that. But obviously her ears are rubbish compared to ours - and last night she proved it. We weren't there but she told us.

We were actually out, Josie and I, hunting, when Josie had enough and went to go in.

My mum was in the sitting room and her version is that she heard a kerflump at the cat flap and then subdued squeaks. Oh no! she thought, what have they brought this time?

In mum's version she gets up immediately to see but I imagine there was a lot more dithering and steeling of core - she's peculier around prey.

Anyway off she went - eventually - to find the source of the squeaks. And there she was.

For it was Josie. She's not keen on the door, had one attempt and decided it would be easier to summon mum and be let in. Pads on the glass sliding makes an interesting squeak and sure enough - to Josie's delight- mum appeared and opened the door for her.

Now no cat would mistake what was obviously a feline-generated attention catching noise to the squeak of a catch. People ears aren't good.

Talking of things to catch I haven't actually caught anything in a couple of weeks now. Must try harder!!

And a couple of updates - Alfie and Ricky are getting along better these days and sharing beds to sleep on if not much more as yet but that is much better than was so there mum is very hopeful they'll be mates eventually.

And Matt came 11th out of 20 in his Strong Man competition which he was happy with as he hasn't been doing those events that long. He even came third in one event.


Cats on the TV

June 3rd 2014 10:42 pm
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I was out last night but had to come running in when the heavens opened. I do not care to be wet.

I found mum on the sofa with Josie by her side, both transfixed by the TV. A little tiny kitten was mewing. Mum was saying "Ahhhhh! She is the cutest thing," I caught her eye. "After you two of course" she quickly added.

They were watching a programme called "The Secret Life of Cats". I caught Josie's eye nervously but she gave a little shake of her head. Josie had been watching intently in case they gave away the important secrets - how we train people, how we know exactly where to be to maximise attention etc, all not in there thank goodness.

What we learned was good stuff. When our people stroke us they get a burst of happy hormone and lower their blood pressure and heart rate. They are a third less likely to get heart disease than non cat people.

Now my mum will realise that when I'm chivvying her for tummy rubs it is not a selfish desire for that delicious sensation but an entirely altruistic concern for her health.

And there are colours - called red and green - that we don't see but as we get by perfectly well without them they can't be that important. Whereas people can't see ultraviolet that stands out for us clear as day. Most peculier - they must feel all deprived not to see what we see.

We all enjoyed that programme. They should show it every night!


Mum attacked Josie

June 2nd 2014 10:34 pm
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It was brilliant. I haven't laughed so much in ages!!

It was last night. I was sitting next to my mum on the bedside table while she sat up in bed and read me my bedtime story. It was pretty exciting and I didn't want her to stop but she put down the book, said it was now sleepy time, kissed me goodnight and turned off the light.

She then stretched herself out in the bed all relaxedy but there was an unexpected flurry of tortie fur.

"What was that?" exclaimed my mum.

"A polite excuse me would have sufficed," huffed Josie.

For she had also been enjoying the story, curled up further down the bed. She had heard the sleepy time instruction and nestled herself down only to find herself turfed off the bed by mum's massive people foots suddenly pushing from under the duvet.

She is still sulking this morning and didn't come out for her breakfast. I'm going to hang around as if mum feels guilty enough there'll be a tasty morsel produced and Josie likes to share. Or I like to share Josie's stuff which amounts to the same thing.


We had visitors

June 1st 2014 10:41 pm
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We know when people are coming to stay as mum clears everything out of the spare room and Josie helped mum make up the bed. Oh - mum says chasing your own tail while someone tries to make up a bed around you isn't helping. Josie tried to look contrite but couldn't quite suppress her glee. She did have a marvellous time.

The guests arrived on Saturday night. It was one of mum's old college friend's son and husband. The son, Matt, was competing in a Strong Man competition locally on Sunday. They wanted him to get a good night's sleep before.

People who do Strong Man stuff are ...well... big. All those muscles. And fathers of people who do Strong Man stuff aren't small either. Our flat isn't so big and there was a lot of people getting in each other's way. I was glad to be small enough to slide round them all.

What I didn't like was Matt did sleep in the spare room and his dad on a mattress in the sitting room so all the doors were shut. Mum doesn't normally close doors much and I like to roam at will.

What I did like is that Matt may be able to lift cars and pull trucks but he can also give a friendly cat a pretty good head scritch!

Our flat is all back to normal now. I kept well out of the way while that restiration was going on but Josie helped, despite mum's ingratitude of before. She's very forgiving luckily for mum. And mum said "Helping isn't chasing...oh what's the use!!"


Watch out for my dinner bowl! Too late!

May 29th 2014 10:37 pm
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Mum likes to tell us stories of the cats she has known and loved in the past. I'm pretty sure they aren't true. These paragons never woke her at night, came when called, sat daintily on a lap when invited etc. Nah! These are the cats of her imagination.

One thing she says is that they came to her at meal-times so their bowls were always in one place. Unless we're really especially hungry Josie and I like our food brought to us. We wait at our chosen place - hall, kitchen, sitting room, wherever we feel like that day.

Mum mutters that she can't think how she came to be our waitress but talented human trainers like us do make it look effortless.

Anyway this does mean that our bowls are rarely in a neat corner of the kitchen. Very rarely - the floor is cold in there.

So yesterday mum was walking through, plate of food in hand, when her big foot landed not on the carpet she expected but on one of our bowls and it slid beneath her. She didn't come crashing down which would have been really funny but in her efforts not to fall her hand flew around and potatoes hurtled to the ground. Josie was quick to move - she's not so keen on potatoes but there might be a little bit of butter to lick and she's very keen on that.

Mum said, "oh no!" and declared that we will eat tidily in the future as she scooped up the casualties. Lucky for her we don't believe her!


Diary of the Day

May 28th 2014 10:07 pm
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Wowser! I was very honoured to have been selected for this and for all my kind messages and gifts. I would like to thank all my Catster friends who are kind enough to read my diary and send me messages without whom there would be no Toby Blog. And I would like to thank my sisfer Josie who is sometimes annoying but mostly OK.

What's that? Mum is coughing. She thinks I accidentally missed her out - mum the Demolition Expert and Cat Novice. There was nothing accidental in her omission.

For yesterday evening mum came home all agitated. Eventually there was a knock and there was Paul from next door and he looked at her and laughed and mum said "I am SO sorry" for my mum had demolished his garden wall. On Tuesday night, driving home she had reversed and felt a knock, pulled forward and reversed properly. She checked the car, not so much as a scratch, she had been going slowly, all good.

Wednesday morning "Uh OH! That wall wasn't lying on its side when I last saw it." All hope that it had fallen down before and she hadn't noticed vanished when another neighbour walked by and said, "They've made a right mess of that," and mum had to say, "Actually I think that was me."

I say Demolition Expert as no-one can work out quite how she took out so much wall with one small knock.

And Cat Novice - at the weekend mum proudly put up black-out curtains in our bedroom. She thought if we didn't see so much light we wouldn't wake her so early. It's like she doesn't know cats at all. Of course we wake her early, that's what we do, black-out of no black-out.

But I do thank her really - she has her faults but no-one else knows quite so well how I like my tummy rubbed and Josie and I are training her so she'll turn out OK in the end.

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