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Toby's Diary

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Just what are the rules?

June 24th 2014 10:38 pm
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An exciting buzzy thing came in the flat yesterday - all stripey black and yellow and just waiting to be caught.

"Stand back," I called, "I've got this one." I set off in pursuit.

But my mum hobbled to her feet. "It's a wasp Toby. Leave it. I'll get it."

Well, she's still very uneven when she walks and I'm excellent at catching things so I was happy to race her. Josie fancied her chances too so she was after it as well.

"It will sting you if you catch it," said my mum but we didn't believe her. Little thing like that, really!! It couldn't hurt us.

We were never able to prove it though as it flew to the window and mum wafted it out with a magazine.

So mum reckons catching birds is bad; little black and yellow things is bad; when we caught a fly that was good and we are Ok to chase the moths and each other.

Too many rules!! I'll just keep chasing everything and see what happens.


Looking after my mum

June 23rd 2014 10:46 pm
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Off she went yesterday to the Fracture Clinic. She said the doctor was nice but the nurse did yank her toe around rather when strapping it back up and mum had to remind her it was broken. Anyway she is just to rest it and go back in two weeks.

She did then go to work. She reckons she has a lot on this week and there's nothing wrong with her brain - how can she tell??!!

Her boss said maybe she should wear shoes around the house to prevent this happening again so mum said she worries about stepping on us which has happened. With bare feet at least she realises before damage is done and she would rather break her own foot than our paws.

I thought that showed a proper sense of priorities until she added that's because she has to pay for our treatment but not her own.

No dance class for her last night so she stayed home with her foot up which I liked and I gave her special purrs and snuggles.

Then she stood up and went "Aiiieeeoooww!" and had to sit down again.

"Is your toe worse?" I asked, unsure how this could be.

"It's my ankle," she replied. Turns out where she had been limping all day she had pushed the muscles around in odd ways and after a bit of rest they were making their views known on the matter.

This morning it's the same, ankle worse than toe. Josie was quite fascinated watching mum walk that way and stared which mum said was rude. I think it would be best to go out before they start arguing.


Mum's broken her toe

June 22nd 2014 10:44 pm
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She did this once before but obviously has learned nothing from that experience as she's gone and done it again.

I knew no good would come of her habit of flattening her clothes on that big board thing and sure enough - she was walking across to put them in the cupboard and kicked the bed as she passed.

She looked down and "That's not good" and then "It surely shouldn't stick out at quite that angle" and then "I think I need a little sit down."

She decided she had a choice between never wearing shoes again (they wouldn't fit over the right-angle toe) and going to the Minor Injuries Unit so, one foot bare and peculier toe, and off she went. They agreed with her it wasn't good so yesterday off she went for an X-ray and looking at that they've sent her to the Fracture Clinic today.

So she had to spend most of the weekend with her foot up. I asked if it hurt and she said only if she knocks it, which she tries not to do. And now they've straightened it up for her she can look at it without coming over woozy which is better.

It was a beautifully warm and sunny weekend so I delegated nursing duties to Josie and went to see if I could find a mouse or bird or something to cheer my mum up. I didn't manage to catch anything but was still more useful than Josie who accidentally strayed in the path of a sunbeam. Well, you know how that is. Once the warm gets in you all you can do is sleep so that's all Josie did.

I quite liked knowing my mum was sitting, feet up, just waiting for me to come home, but she says she'll be better soon. (She hopes!)


My annoying mum

June 19th 2014 10:40 pm
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This morning my biscuit bowl was empty, licked clean and not a single crunchie left. This is never good but I felt reassured when my mum picked it up and reached for the box. But it was not there.

She started rootling in the cupboards muttering, "I know I bought a new one."

I was standing behind her, mewing piteously so she would understand the gravity of the situation.

"I'm sure I bought a new one. Where is it?"

"Don't tease me like this. I need biscuits and I need them now," I said.

She pointed at my other bowl. "You have soft food. Eat that for now."

You can imagine my bewilderment. It was my biscuit belly that was empty, not the other one, soft food wouldn't help at all. I kept the mewing going.

"Oh Toby," said my mum. sadly. "I'm not even dressed yet. I can't run to the shop in my pyjamas."

But I knew she could so ran to where my biscuit bowl should be and looked sadly at the air that occupied that space and mewed some more.

She was just about to get dressed when she remembered - she had bought a new box, it was feet away, all full of chrunchilicious nuggets. What a relief to hear the reassuring rattle of kibble on china and see my bowl returned to me, brim full.

I have decided to forgive her for forgetting where she put the box but she had better never do that to me again. There was nearly an emergency situation!


The best time of the day

June 18th 2014 10:47 pm
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I love morning when mum wakes up and I go out. I love to sleep in a sunbeam in the day. I love when my mum comes home and I go out. But the best time of the day of all is that time when the sun slides off to bed and everything becomes muzzy and exciting. Bizarrely at this time of year that is pretty much when my mum decides to go to sleep.

Yesterday evening we were all in the garden, mum had her book and was sharing a frozen yoghurt with Josie and I was hunting and we were as happy as can be in the sunshine. Then night fell, twilight descended and "I'm going in" said my mum.

We followed in the hope of tasty supper and were chasing each other round (and I would have it said that it was Josie that knocked all those birthday cards over) when mum said, "Bother! I left the table outside. Stay here cats, while I fetch it."

Once again I would have it noted that it was Josie who was naughty and ran out while mum fetched the table. Mum sighed and went after her. Mum caught Josie but they looked as if they had so much fun with the chase I ran out to be caught too.

Mum ran after me (and don't people make interesting noises when they step on slugs in bare feet) which was brilliant and Josie came out for another go. Now mum could see just how amazing it is to run around at twilight. It's my best time of the day.

Mum cheated in the end. She went in and made tasty food noises and when we came in locked the door but at least we had our tasty food.


Now my mum is old

June 17th 2014 10:59 pm
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Yesterday she couldn't get on to Catster to do my blog.

"Is it that your old fingers are too frail to press the buttons?" I asked.

I got a grumpy stare. "No it isn't. Nothing's happening. I don't know why."

Anyway she seems to have regrouped her strength today and we're in.

We enjoyed her birthday. I didn't manage to catch her anything in the end so just gave her some snuggles and she said she liked that better.

Her best present in my opinion was two books - one for me and one for Josie where she can write all about us and store our medical records and all that. She has to answer some hard questions for them though. What exactly is my favourite toy? Often it is Da Bird of course but then there's my Cube and my Dippy Box with the things in and the Red Dot - and all the many toys that my mum refuses to buy me as she reckons I won't play with them. They're probably my top toys.

Josie says it's easy - the stick with feathers on is her favourite and then I remembered - it's Josie. She's fun to chase!

Mum heard from Ricky and Alfie's mum and the news is good. They now sleep happily on the bed together so it seems like Ricky has accepted his new brofur and Alfie has his furever home now.


Today is my mum's birthday

June 15th 2014 10:41 pm
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She started celebrating on Friday and hasn't stopped really.

She brought a bag of presents home from work and was showing me - my favourites are a coaster that says "Only my cat understands me" (although that must be Josie as I haven't a clue why she is so odd) and a necklace with a cat on it. And then mum pulled something else out.

"Crikey!" she said. Crikey indeed.

The presents had been given over lunch at a pub. Mum had driven back to her office and left the presents in her car - on that beautifully warm sunny day and inside her car had got hot, hot, hot! What had been lots of individual chocolates with different centres were now one large blended gooey mass.

I felt her pain. If it was kitty treats I would hate to think of them all going in the bin.

"The bin?" exclaimed my mum. "Not the bin, the fridge. We'll see what can be retrieved." She hasn't plucked up the courage to examine them yet.

We hardly saw my mum over the weekend but her company give them all a day holiday for their birthday so she'll make that up to us today. I'm going to see if I can catch her a bird as my present to her. She says she doesn't want one but I'm sure she's just being polite. I'll do my best.


I am a neglected cat

June 12th 2014 10:36 pm
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Mum laughed when I said to type that and says she is a neglected people but she isn't because Josie keeps her company.

I'll explain why I feel neglected.

We are in-at-night cats. I don't remember agreeing to that but that is how it is. We have one last meal before we go to sleep and last night I was really really hungry when mum was dishing it up. And then I remembered why - I had no breakfast and I had no supper. How cruel is that?!

Mum said, "But you went dashing out in the morning before I could feed you and you went dashing out when I came home from work. You weren't there for your meal-times."

I remember now. There was a unicorn, a griffin and a couple of dragons to sort out. No wonder I wasn't hungry.

"What if I fade away into nothing?" I enquired. Then she would find out about all the dragons.

"You have biscuits," she said.

"I like biscuits."

So there we have it. Some things are more exciting than food. (Mum sighed and said she wishes she felt the same way!!)


I LOVE summer

June 11th 2014 10:46 pm
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As soon as my mum gets up I am outdoors, enjoying the warm. I pop back for snacks and the odd chat with my mum but mostly I am out.

Mum was grumbling, "How do I know what to say in your diary when I never know what you are up to these days?"

I looked at her. "You have no idea at all?" I sometimes see her watching me but turns out mostly, no, she has no idea.

So I told her. Yesterday I saw off six large, scaley, fire-breathing dragons that wanted to eat her. I hissed back and used swipes of my paw, all claws extended, and they were gone. The day before that it was an enormous green ogre, dripping slime as he walked. He took a little more cunning but I ran rings round him until over he toppled. And of course there was the snake-headed gorgon that...

"Are you absolutely certain?" Mum had that look. "Only Enfield isn't noted for its mythical beasts."

"Yes I am sure." Of course I am. You see what I have to put up with, no gratitude at all. Anyway I have to go. There's a unicorn at the window trying to get my attention. Toby to the rescue again no doubt!


How we are

June 10th 2014 10:32 pm
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Yesterday was all hot and sunny so when mum came home from work she opened all the doors and windows to cool the flat down. We like doors and windows all open so we can come and go as we please.

Thing is, when you see a cat shaped shape making its way around the curtains from the garden you can't always be sure it's your sisfur. It's best to attack first and ask questions later.

"It's always Josie," said my mum as Josie fought back from my well-timed pounce. But one day it might not be and then how foolish would we feel?!

Josie does the same thing to me. Mum asked if we don't use our excellent scent-detecting abilities or equisite hearing to know it is a family member coming in but it's much more fun our way!!

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