Toby's Diary

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Bird hunting

September 9th 2012 10:35 pm
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It was all sunny and warm at the weekend. Us cats love the sunny and warm but it does keep the frogs in the dampness of their ponds so I turned my attention to the birds.

The trouble with birds, and the reason I've never caught one, is that they fly high. How to reach them? Then I had a clever idea.

We have a big bush in our garden. My mum has been chopping at it but only as high as she can reach and some of the spikes stretch right up and the birds gather on these branches to have a chat about this and that, believing themselves to be safe from the likes of me.

So if I could stealthily climb those branches I would grab one of those birds and be home with my meal before any of the others knew what was going on.

Where the plan went wrong - apparently I weigh rather more than the average bird. The lower branches were fine but when I got higher, in tantalisingly close proximity to my prey, the branches wobbled and the birds flew away. Actually they made so much noise my mum came out to see what was going on. It took her a while to spot me through the leaves.

So I did not catch anything except flying leaves at the weekend. I still get a kick out of running in enthusaistically with a large leaf in my mouth, to watch mum run for the frog catching kit only to realise she has been fooled again!


I got in a fight

September 6th 2012 10:33 pm
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It was late and I saw a bad cat in my garden. I let him know exactly what I thought of that.

I was winning, I truly was when mum came hurtling out of the flat and scared him away. I didn't follow but kept up the stream of insults and mum said she was glad she couldn't speak cat as I didn't sound very polite.

We came indoors and mum wanted to know if I had been bitten. Of course not - although he did get some chunks of fur which upset mum but didn't hurt. I wasn't allowed out after that so I made mum entertain me. Every time she didn't pick up a toy fast enough I headed for Josie, promising to show my mum a complete re-enactment of the fight. Just that threat was enough and we had a good playtime.

In other news mum had a letter and Josie's pet insurance has gone up again. Josie very nobly offered never to go to the vet any more and mum said that she hoped that would be the case but she's keeping the insurance to be on the safe side. I thought we shouldn't and spend the money on treats and toys instead and mum says that's why I'm not in charge of the money.


What were they doing?

September 5th 2012 10:33 pm
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Summer has come back here which is what we wanted. The days are sunny and warm and we can't wait for my mum to come home from work so we can grab a quick supper and get out there and play. I say we because even Josie comes out for a while.

But as it gets darker she goes in and mum draws the curtains. That's weird because to me that's the most exciting time. The bugs get going and everything is a little bit more mysterious in the dark.

So just what are mum and Josie doing behind the curtain that is so much better than frog hunting? They claimed to be quietly watching TV but I was suspicious. I would catch them out. I ran full pelt, dived under the curtain and threw myself in the room.

But I was too slow. They were both sitting innocently on their chairs. I looked all round for clues - maybe a frog leg or a corner of cat treat bag or the feathers of Da Bird but there was nothing. I ran out. I would have to be faster next time.

About five times I ran in hoping to see what they were doing but every time they managed to be just sitting there. Mum said that's because that's really all they were doing but I still have my doubts. Actually mum was laughing at me for my mad sprints in to the room, wide eyed stares and double quick dashes out but the laugh will be on them when I catch them out one day.


Helping my mum relax

September 4th 2012 10:32 pm
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Mum came home and announced she had been shown a relaxation technique so if we could just leave her be and go about our business she would do it and be all relaxed and free from tension.

Naturally we couldn't wait to join in.

Mum lay on her back on the floor with a book under her head, she had her arms by her side and then she bent her legs to create a cat tunnel. I ran through it several times; seemed only polite. That made her laugh but she said that wasn't meant to be a cat tunnel.

Then Josie decided to relax too by curling up on mum's chest which she finds very relaxing. That made mum laugh as well.

The conclusion is that whoever came up with the position did not have cats. That it may be relaxing in itself but she'll never know. And perhaps having your cats make you laugh is the most relaxing thing anyway.

Sometimes she calls us crazy cats but we think she is the crazy one.


Helping my mum to sleep

September 3rd 2012 10:32 pm
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The bestest way to get a good sleep is to nestle your nose into your soft, furry paw as all cats know. We sleep best all cosy like that.

Last night I noticed that my mum doesn't sleep with her hand against her nose. Then I realised why - her hands are very good at opening cat food but they do lack fur. In fact, poor thing, pretty much all she has is that long fur on her head. Well you have to work with what you have. I reached out a paw and combed some of that hair over her face. There. That's better. Nose all warm.

She pushed it back.

I sighed, reached out and combed it over again. She pushed it back. Three or four times this went on - gratitude is not one of her strong points.

In the end she rolled away from me and I had to leave her to it. But she shouldn't blame me if she doesn't get a proper sleep. I tried my best.


Meeting Leo

September 2nd 2012 10:34 pm
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Saturday was a happy sunny day and quite breezy which makes the garden extra exciting as things blow about. I was having a good time chasing leaves when a small white and tabby cat started walking through the gap in the fence to next door.

"Excuse me, " I said firmly. "This is MY garden."

He looked at me. "I just wanted to play awhile."

Mum came out to see who I was talking to.

"It's little Leo, the kitten from next door." she exclaimed cheerfully. "Hello Gorgeous. Aren't you lovely?"

He seeemd to gain confidence from mum knowing his name and the admiration but I do not want my mum admiring other cats in my garden. I am her special boy. Time for emergency measures. I produced my most blood curdling yodel and he got the message and backed away.

Mum said maybe we could have had fun together and it was a shame but he needs to understand there are certain boundaries in life - and gardens.

Other than that we had a very happy weekend. Josie sat on mum's lap which was a rare treat for mum, especially as she had a good book in hand, the best part of a cup of tea in reach and nowhere to go so they both liked that.

It is a bit cooler though so Josie tried to snuggle under the cushions on her chair and mum took a picture which is now on Josie's page. You'll see Josie was mostly successful. Looks like Autumn is on its way back. And mum is back at work today. We'll miss her.


Noises in the night

August 30th 2012 11:23 pm
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I woke up in the night feeling rather peckish. Luckily I knew just what to do and was chowing down some biscuits when my mum came in the room.

"Oh," she said. "That noise was you crunching."

I would have replied but I had my mouth full.

She went back to bed and when I was full I followed her and jumped up next to her. I was looking down at her thinking how happy it is to have a tummy full of tasty biscuits, to have a warm bed to sleep on and a mum who loves me very much and I was purring away. Sometimes just thinking happy makes me purr. Actually I was feeling so happy I dribbled a bit and that landing on mum's arm got her to stroke me which is what I had been hoping would happen.

We were just settling down again when we heard a strange clang, quietly repeating.

"What's that?" asked mum but I didn't know so we went to find out.

There are still things in the hall that mum is deciding about and we found that Josie was trying to make the smoothie maker work and her claws were twanging against the buttons. Mum explained that it wasn't plugged in so wouldn't work - and also there was no fruit anywhere near it so Josie had better settled for some water - which she would probably enjoy more anyway.

So we all went back to bed but we got mum up early. Today is the last day of her holiday and we don't want her to miss a single bit of it.


Mystery cupboard

August 30th 2012 12:06 am
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Yesterday my mum announced she was going to clear out The Cupboard.

I was worried - "Is this wise?"

The Cupboard is just outside our front door and for over ten years mum has put things in but nothing has ever come out. What would she find? I was worried there might be another cat in there but mum was pretty sure she wouldn't have done that.

One by one the contents appeared in our hall. No cats but mostly kitchen appliances. "Why did I buy a smoothie maker? I never make smoothies?" And not one, not two, not three but four picnic sets. My mum used to live in a flat with no garden but close to a lovely park but even then she doesn't think she used four! Josie kept going to the back of the cupboard to explore which I thought reckless and mum did check each time she was out before shutting it again. I wouldn't go anywhere near it.

So we have an interesting hall at the moment with piles for the charity shop and piles for the dump and piles that my mum just can't make her mind up about. "What if I do want to make smoothies ever? Or have a fondue? Or a very large picnic?"

It rained yesterday so the garden is wet - prime frog hunting conditions so I'm going to leave mum and Josie to sort out the stuff and get going.


The mighty hunter

August 28th 2012 11:46 pm
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Yesterday as mum was home all day we could run around in the garden to our heart's content.

My best bit was when I saw a squirrel. I never did see one before and I really wanted to catch him. He was up on the fence and I was very quietly creeping along for my pounce when my mum came running out all shouty and waving and the squirrel ran as fast as he could all along the fences.

I may have mentioned my mum's very unfortunate hunting style before. No wonder the only meat she can bring us home comes in little packets.

When I ran out of things outdoors to chase I came in and attacked Josie which made mum grumpy. I said I thought Josie liked it but mum reckons that's not a happy growl when I attack her.

It's sunny again today and the big doors are open so off for more epic adventures. Even Josie reckons she'll come along.


Neglected cats

August 27th 2012 11:36 pm
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Sunday was brilliant because mum was home pretty much all day so we got to play all day long. I often find that if I have one extra lively day I need an extra sleepy one the next to catch up. So mum had said she would play with us but Josie and I were just too tired to join in. Which was lucky really as mum went out anyway. So much for our surprise! But we were so sleepy we didn't even get up for our treats which made mum laugh.

She also neglected us on Saturday. She said she was going to a wedding but she came back smelling of dog. She said the bride has a little dog which is called Chewie.

"And was she?"



Apparently it's not the done thing to go to someone's home and then bite their dog to test the truth of their name. I said I would have and mum said that's among the many reasons she doesn't take me places.

Anyway we are all lively today so hopefully will have a happy day and mum promises she is going nowhere. Yey!!

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