Toby's Diary

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Bad Josie (again!)

August 13th 2013 10:33 pm
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Surely it's horse time now.

It was at sleepy time again. We had all had a happy evening playing in the garden and were ready to set off to see what dreams the night had in store for us. I was on my chair but Josie wanted some mum snuggle time.

One thing Josie likes is if my mum bends her arm on the pillow to make a circle. Josie then nestles herself in there all surrounded by mum and that makes her purr. And if she's feeling really mellow it makes her paddy-paw.

Usually her claws go in the pillow but she wanted mum to know just how happy she was feeling so she reached out a paw and a claw...

"Ow," said my mum with some force. "That's my nose."

I can see that having a claw in your nose wouldn't be very restful.

"I bet horses don't do that," I called.

"They have hooves and I think a hoof on your nose would be worse," said my mum. Josie had vanished to her own bed. She doesn't mean to hurt mum and was feeling bad.


Josie's wish

August 12th 2013 10:37 pm
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I was being a good boy last night, curled up on my chair sleeping and my mum was in her bed sleeping and Josie had gone off to her bed but not sleeping. She was wishing.

We were woken by the crumpety-crump, slither type noise.

"Try again," Josie was encouraging herself. "Nearly got it. Claw in, little tug."

My mum sat up and peered over the bed.

"What are you doing?" she asked. Not an unreasonable question.

Josie backed out from under the bed, dragging the distinctively shaped object that she had been manoevering out of its box.

"Your Christmas stocking?" said my mum looking at it.

"Yes," said Josie. "I want some toys and treats so I'm leaving it out for Sandy Claws."

"But Sandy Claws only comes on Christmas Eve," my mum reminded her. "You did try this one before. He's busy at the moment making all the toys."

Josie looked quite crestfallen.

"But I've been really really good," she said.

"You have," agreed my mum. "Mostly. But you do already have quite a lot of toys."

So my mum put the stocking back and we all went back to sleep. I am hoping that this is softening my mum's attitude about the whole horse thing. I bet they don't go rootling under people's beds looking for Christmas stockings when other people and cats are sleeping.

I think Josie was just jealous because I was a Diary Pick but I can't help it if the Catster Diary People like my diary. Thank you for all the kind messages from the cats that like my diary too.


August 11th 2013 10:39 pm
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Mum came home all tired from her day at the stables on Friday - but happy. She said everyone was very lovely and they got to pat the horses. They even got to give them treats.

"Not my little fish?" I said, with an anxious glance at the drawer where they live.

Mum laughed. "Horses don't like kitty treats. They had special horse ones, green with herbs that horses like in them."

That got me thinking.

"Do you think they would like to swap one of their horses for a cat? They could have Josie and I could have a flat-mate who doesn't eat my treats."

But mum said no. Apparently I haven't grasped just how much bigger horses are than cats and one wouldn't fit here.

"Besides they have a cat, a handsome black one," she said.

Ah yes, they would need a cat to organise everything I suppose.

"And," she added, "They aren't your treats. I buy them for you to share with Josie."

"I do always get mine first so they must be mine," I said.

"That's because otherwise Josie wouldn't be able to eat hers, you would steal them. She has better manners," said my mum but I don't think that's true.


Mum's odd day

August 8th 2013 10:31 pm
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She started getting things together this morning that don't look like normal worky things. I commented on this and she says it's because she isn't having a normal worky day.

"I'm volunteering. I'm off to help out at the stables. Remember I told you my company chose to support a Riding for the Disabled place this year?"

I do. I remember a horse came to see them. I remember mum told me an interesting thing about horses.

"So you know that horses are bigger than cats. What else do you know?" I am always keen to learn stuff.

There was a pause.

"Yup, definitely much bigger than cats."

"How can you help? You know nothing about horses," I said

"Oh I'm not doing anything with the horses. We're clearing hedges," she replied.

I looked out of the window. How to put this?

"You don't know anything about hedges either. Look at the jungle out there." I favour the direct approach.

She looked a little downcast. "I'm hoping they'll tell me what to do."

I hope they don't tell her too much. I love my jungle garden.


Being a good cat

August 7th 2013 10:37 pm
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Sometimes I am. My mum was tired last night so when she called me indoors I ran straight over and in I jumped the door. She looked surprised.

"Who are you and what have you done with Toby?" she asked.

"Very funny," I sighed. "Where's supper?"

I had my supper and we all trotted off to bed. A little snuggle so she would have sweet dreams and then I settled myself on the window sill to sleep. It's still too hot for my chair although it's much cooler than it was.

Mum's all perky this morning on account of sleeping so well and I'm nestled beside her - the perfect cat.

(Don't worry - I'm just lulling her into a false sense of security! I'll find new ways to tease her.)


A good game

August 6th 2013 10:34 pm
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Try this one when your mum is in bed asleep and you aren't sleepy yet.

I walked over my mum then wondered if I could remember exactly where I put my paws and if I could repeat the walk. I jumped back. Hm. One paw there on her arm, one paw here on her tummy. Over I went. Was that right? I'm not sure. Jump back and try again. Paw here, paw there and so on....

Until my mum said, "Cut it out Toby". I knew she wasn't really asleep, only pretending and I needed my head rubbing.

I did let her get some sleep later but then Josie woke her. Josie is still being all happy mum is home again so wanted to snuggle and I could hear her purr. Apparently snuggling gets headrubs while walking on doesn't. Interesting.

I wondered what result a gentle tap would get so tested that one later.

Mum is grumpy this morning. She says she would like to know what it is to sleep a whle night without cats waking her. Just one more dream for her to aspire to!


Getting my own back

August 5th 2013 10:32 pm
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My Mum thinks I have forgiven her for going away and not buying me a bird table but I haven't. Here is how I have been getting my vengeance.

Yesterday it rained. Not just a little bit, a lottle bit. It poured and poured. I went out in it and got soaked right through and then came back. I pretended to love my mum, rubbing my sodden fur against her so she got wet and muddy too.

"Toby - you are saturated," she said and it was true, one stroke and water was everywhere. It took a while to get dry but it will take her longer to get the mud off everything I rubbed against so totally worth it.

Then at bed time I jumped in the middle of mum's bed and made myself all cosy so she couldn't get in herself.

Seh rubbed my head. "What's got into you, crazy cat?" she asked. "Abandonment and no bird table," I thought but I just purred like a cat who cannot be moved.

I am pleased with yesterday's plans. Now I just need to think of some more...


Mum's friends

August 4th 2013 10:38 pm
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I did not like my weekend as my mum went away and abandoned us. When she came back on Sunday Josie went all loopy and happy but I was cool. Out I went.

Later I came in and sat beside her but I didn't look at her and flicked my tail so she would know she had displeased me.

She said she had gone back to Norfolk for the annual school reunion picnic. I don't know most of her old school friends so when she got her camera out to download their pictures I was interested to see what they looked like.

"That one's a dog," I was surprised. I had more imagined they would be people.

"Some of them brought their dogs," explained my mum, scanning to the next photo.

"That one's a dog too," I couldn't help but notice.

"They were lovely dogs. I do have some of people," she said.

Indeed she did - although always with the dogs. Another photo.

"There's you - with the dogs."

"I hadn't realised I had taken quite so many of the dogs," she admitted.

Then the last one really got my attention for it was a cat. His people have made him a very splendid elevated platform with a little roof to sleep in and there he was, all content.

"I want one of those," I said.

"It's not a cat place. It's a bird table," she said.

"Even better. I want one more. I like birds."

But apparently we're not getting one.

I am still being cool with my mum, abandoned and no bird table. Josie is still being all happy to see mum. No style, that cat!


I am REALLY not coming in

August 1st 2013 10:35 pm
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Having been a bit cooler yesterday was all hot again. My mum said it was a thing called the Spanish plume, headed straight up from the Mediterranean.

"That doesn't sound like Laura Belle sent it," I commented. There must be some kind Spanish cats who thought I might like it and I did.

And there was no way I was coming in. Mum tried the calling thing. I ignored her. She tried the temptingly scented food. I knew I would get that later. She tried the Dreamies but I was wise to that one. Even they would not take me from my pleasingly warm evening filled with things to chase to an over-hot flat filled with Josie.

So mum vanished. I heard going to bed sounds and laughed. Cracked it! I'm out for the night. What adventures I shall have! What creatures I shall meet!

What creatures shall I meet? As my Catster friends have pointed out, not all of them are prey and not all of them are well-disposed to small black cats.

"Mum," I called, scrabbling at the door, "Let me in." No sign of her then sweet relief there she was.

"I thought maybe you had gone to bed," I said as I poured myself through the door.

"I couldn't sleep if I didn't know you were safe," she replied. "I knew you would come in."

The plume has gone today as suddenly as it arrived. Maybe the Spanish cats missed it.


Mums can be annoying

July 31st 2013 10:38 pm
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The first thing my mum did was come home late yesterday. I was waiting at the window for her. When I did see her she had lots of bags. Turns out it was payday and she had been shopping. We are all stocked up on cat food and kitty litter.

"And treats?" I asked.

Mum looked at me. "Have you been a good boy?"

"Perfect," - why does she even bother asking?

"Then yes, I do have some treats. Including some new fishy ones."

So I forgave the whole late thing (although I haven't had any of the new treats yet.)

But then she was watching TV and a programme about Guide Dogs. She was all "look at the cute puppies" and "aren't those dogs well-trained?" She always gets ideas after watching programmes about dogs. Josie and I are cats and will never be trainable.

I am a sort of Guide Cat of course. I shepherd her into the kitchen when my tummy is empty and out of bed when I want to play. They should do a programme about all the valuable work cats do in making sure they get the best possible care. That's what she should be watching.

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