Toby's Diary

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Just occasionally my mum is right

November 15th 2012 10:30 pm
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We were all on my mum's bed. Mum was reading her book, Josie was on her legs and I was watching them. When Josie noticed me watching her she started flicking her tail. Excellent - Game on.

I moved closer and tried to catch her tail in my mouth.

"Don't bite her tail," said mum. "She doesn't like that."

I thought I knew better. Why would she flick her tail so enticingly if she didn't want me to attack it? The more attempts I made the more wildly the tail moved. At last I caught it and gave just a friendly nip, not a bite proper.

Turns out mum was right. Josie said some most unladylike things and shot off the bed. Who would have guessed that would happen?

We are friends again now. I think.

We got some post yesterday. Not our cards - something even better! We got a free sample of some new food and it was delicious. Mum said they also sent a coupon so we might even get to have a whole box. Our normal food is Ok but this was something else - clean bowls all round. I was so intent on enjoying mine I didn't even steal any of Josie's - that's how good it was!

 

The run away biscuit

November 14th 2012 10:35 pm
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We have our biscuits in a bowl next to our water bowl. If I'm really hungry I crunch straight from the bowl but really biscuits taste better if they are scooped out and eated from the floor. Then my whiskers can really join in and we get the full taste sensation. Neither mum nor Josie get this but I like to flip my biscuits out, one by one.

I was doing that last night when a disaster happened. A slight paw misjudgement and the biscuit slipped between the biscuit bowl and the water bowl. I couldn't get my nose to it so I tried to reach it with my paw. My paw was too wide for the gap. Hm. I tried the extendable claw but couldn't grip the errant biscuit. Maybe another angle? I walked around the bowl and reached in from the other side.

I was a cat on a mission. I was getting that biscuit.

Mum laughed at me.

"There are plenty more in the bowl. Why not eat those and I'll rescue the stray one later?"

But they weren't my escaped biscuit and probably wouldn't taste as good. I had to have that one. I got it in the end, oh yes I did.

Mum said she couldn't bear watching me any longer so got up from her sofa and moved the bowls more apart. Excellent. And it was very delicious and well worth the work on both our parts.

Our Christmas card photos haven't come yet but mum had an e-mail to say they have shipped. I thought this meant they were coming on a boat which was pretty cool but mum said it will be a lorry actually.

"How many did you order for a whole lorry?"

"It won't just have ours. They'll be lots of others in there too."

So now I'm worried they'll get lost and we might have someone else's pictures instead. I won't relax until they are safely here.

 

New box

November 13th 2012 11:06 pm
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My mum was late home yesterday. She said she had to go and collect a parcel from the Post Office and oh yes, Amazon had sent us a shiny new box. Mum thought rather they had sent the DVD and game that were inside.

"My new box!!"

I let Josie try it out first and she reported it as being very satisfactory so I climbed inside. I am happy to report it is indeed an excellent box.

"Did you ever meet a box you didn't like?" mum asked but she's missing the point.

I sat in it awhile enjoying the craftsmanship and quality materials.

"Are you going to sleep in there?" mum asked.

"No. I am closing my eyes better to appreciate the smooth texture of the cardboard."

But now she mentioned it the size did seem perfectly formed for a curled up cat. No doubt designed with that in mind. So I did. Churlish not to.

Mum took a picture which is now on my page along with a new one of Josie and me just sleeping on the arm of the sofa together. And she ordered some Christmas cards on-line showing me reaching out and tapping a bauble on last year's tree. Everyone will love to have that on their mantlepeice this year.

 

Wet inside

November 12th 2012 10:36 pm
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I had to call my mum this morning. "There's puddles of water on the kitchen floor."

"There are," she agreed. "Can you remember why?"

"No"

"Run back through this morning."

I thought about that. "I woke up when the heating came on and woke you up to let you know that it was on."

"Right. You don't need to do that by the way. I'm happy to have that as a pleasant surprise when my alarm goes off. Then what?"

I thought again.

"Breakfast with gravy so I only had a little and then I went out."

"But you didn't have your normal twenty minutes did you?"

"I remember now. There was an enormous fire breathing dragon in the garden and I had to come in very quickly."

"And where was I at that time?" she wanted to know.

"In the shower. I could hear the water running"

And yes, it came back to me. I had scrabbled at my door with frantic paws and my mum had come, dripping wet out of her shower, to rescue me and let me in the dragon-free sanctuary that is home.

So it is shower water on our kitchen floor that mum will mop up. And I get to feel pretty clever about how well trained I have her that she came and didn't leave me to wait! My paws were very urgent paws though. And I think the dragon may have gone now so I might go back out..

And I was a Diary Pick so I would like to thank everyone for my lovely messages. I do feel extremely special to be chosen.

 

Loving a wet weekend

November 11th 2012 10:35 pm
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It was all raining when we woke up on Saturday. Mum said she loves a wet weekend when there is nowhere she has to be. I love a wet weekend for entirely different reasons.

My mum does crazy stuff at the weekend - things like washing the kitchen floor and changing the sheets. When it's muddy outside it is very easy for me to restore everything how I like it - I like to decorate things with my paw prints and leave muddy designs so everyone knows how artistic I am.

I did have to keep going out of course to top up the mud levels on my paws. And then back in again. Mum had been to the library and had a big bag of books to read so wasn't so happy that she had to keep letting me in and out but I had important work to be doing.

"I could go off you, you know" she remarked on what I think was only about the fifteenth time.

Lucky for her I know that's not true.

In the evening we all snuggled down, Josie on mum's lap and me nestled by their side. Mum said she could see why I would be sleepy but wasn't sure if Josie had actually done anything all day. Josie was too tired to answer. She later told me she had very busy dreams so was sleeping those off.

 

Good games

November 8th 2012 10:32 pm
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Mum went out yesterday evening and when she came back I told her that I had been bored, bored, bored! We had sat quietly waiting for her, just patiently dozing.

"That's not entirely true is it Toby?"

I looked at Josie to see if she had given the game away but she shook her head.

"What makes you think that?" I asked.

Mum looked around. "When I left there was a pack of cards, a pen and some hand cream on that table. Now there's about three cards and everything else is scattered on the floor. Plus shiny fish was in your lair and now he's in the kitchen. He's a toy. He did not swim there. Either we had a peculiarly localised tornado or you cats have been having some pretty exciting games."

I was trying to describe just how the tornado ripped through the flat when mum grabbed one of my foam balls from my toy box and threw it. We were off! Best of all Josie had an early night so I had my mum, all the contents of my toy box and a very excited tail.

I didn't want to go to bed when mum eventually said enough but I was sleepy actually and spent the whole night nestled by her legs.

Sometimes my life is a pretty good one!

 

Looking down on mum

November 7th 2012 10:33 pm
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Like all the people I have met so far my mum is quite a bit taller than us cats but yesterday she was slumped down in her bed reading and I was sitting on the window sill watching the world go by.

I turned to go back in the room, tweaked the curtain back a bit and saw the top of mum's head. Now she can't seem to walk past a cat without giving him or her a little caress so I wondered if she might like that too. I reached out a paw and patted her on the head.

She seemed to think that was very funny so I did it a few times. It's important to give something back I always say.

 

Josie's new toy

November 6th 2012 10:36 pm
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Mum was sewing on a button last night. I wanted to help as I am good at unsewing curtains so I thought I might be good at sewing but apparently the two skills are unrelated. Then Josie was mootling about to see what mum was up to.

Mum took an empty cotton reel out of the sewing box and put it on the table. Josie assumed this was directly as a gift for her and she loved it. She flips that cotton reel all over everywhere now.

"I don't get it" I said.

"But sometimes it rolls and sometimes it stands and if I get a claw in I can flick it about" Josie explained but it's still very much her toy. I still don't get it.

There were much fewer bangs last night now we are past November 5th. I thought the whole world celebrated but mum said it's just the UK. Way back in olden times a guy called Fawkes, no a guy called Guy Fawkes took a load of gunpowder underneath parliament and his plan was to blow them all up.

But he needed to have chosen his friends more carefully as someone told the authorities and they caught him in the act and he came to a very nasty end.

People must have liked Government more in those days as not only were they happy no-one got blown up they still celebrate every year by burning a pretend Guy Fawkes on a fire and with fireworks.

Talking of Government mum says she needs to finish this now and see who won the American Presidential Election. When we went to bed it was too close to call..

 

Josie vanishes (and returns)

November 5th 2012 10:41 pm
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My mum was sad yesterday. She had gone back to work to find that some of her friends have been made redundant while she was away. I was sad because mum bought our food in gravy not jelly and I don't like that as much.

Mum said that wasn't quite in the same league as sad goes so she needed us to cheer her up. We weren't going out on account of all the fireworks which did bang all night long so we were on hand to make our mum smile.

We do that best with a snuggle and then some mad chases around the flat. At one point things got so out of hand that Josie slid across a table top and then, with a frantic scrabbling of paws, down behind it.

Silence.

"Are you OK Josie?" my mum called.

More silence. Josie had vanished. It's a drop leaf table with one of its leaves dropped so we couldn't see a thing

Mum was about to get up and vestigate when we first saw two paws and then the top of Josie's head peeping over the edge of the table.

"I'll come and get you," said my mum. "There's no grip for claws in that shiny table top."

That is what my mum thought but cats' claws are pretty ingenious devices and Josie was able to hook into the wooden surface and drag herself back. Mum was torn between being impressed with Josie and fretting for the beautiful smooth table which would now bear the scars of Josie's triumphant return to us.

If in doubt between cats and objects cats always win so mum just accepts that's one more unique piece of furniture she has as only pet owners can have.

 

Not being scared

November 4th 2012 10:35 pm
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On Friday evening, pretty much as soon as it got dark, things started to go bang and flash in the sky. I ran under mum's bed.

I wasn't scared - I just wanted to check that it was safe under there in case mum and Josie were scared and wanted to hide there.

When I had been there long enough to be certain I went out to tell them. I found mum on the sofa and Josie curled up on the arm of the sofa. They looked surprisingly calm but I could see Josie had a paw out touching mum which is what she does when she is nervous.

"I am here now to look after you." I announced. "Budge over!"

And I scrambled up on the arm next to Josie. Mum said that we were in the perfect pose for our card so she ran to get her camera. Timing is everything in these situations and I'm proud to say that I got it just right. I waited until mum had the camera lined up and was just taking it so she has one and a half cats on her picture which won't do.

Later I came back and the three of us were all warmedly together and not scared of all the bangs and whizzes outdoors.

They happened again on Saturday and Sunday nights. I took over Josie's snug as the best place to be if my mum was busy.

Mum says today is November 5th which is what all the bangs have been leading up to so after today things should quieten down. Good!

 
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