Toby's Diary

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Being Fantastic!

May 21st 2013 10:37 pm
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Mum went off to work yesterday what looked like normal but then at lunchtime - key in the door - "you're home early. It must be dinner time."

Mum said that her walking in the door does not always mean we get fed but as we see it there's never any harm in asking. She was in the kitchen after all. But she said she had been at a training event in central London so had come back to grab some lunch and fetch her car and she was then on her way to the office.

It always amuses me to find out the things she learns.

"Go on then - what was it?"

She didn't want to say but I kept asking.

"It was about being fantastic."

"I'm sorry, I thought you just couldn't have...I think you went to learn to be fantastic?"

She nodded. I love being a cat. We're born fantastic. No classes for us. Talking of which...

"You could have just stayed here. Watched and learned."

But apparently if she had asked for a morning to stay home and watch her cats her work wouldn't have agreed and the event she attended was really good she reckons.

So off she went. She came home with another Mojo update. He had a post op check up and all is good. His heart rate is right down from where it was and his scar is healing nicely. Power of the Paw in Action!! He was so happy he went out and caught a mouse which he had hoped to send to you all but Nahid didn't think my mum would like it. (Mum says - maybe she scoffed it down at work.)


Mum's dream

May 20th 2013 10:38 pm
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Not the one where we turn into perfectly well behaved cats, this was an asleep one.

She woke up and twisted her head to look at Josie and muttered, "oh - it was you."

Josie always starts her night in her little pink bed but then she'll wake up and need mum so she either wakes mum so mum bends her arm to make a Josie nest on the pillow next to her or she'll perch on mum sleeping. On this occasion mum was pretty much sleeping on her front so Josie was walking about on mum's back to find a comfy sleeping spot. (Mum didn't use to sleep on her front but it's something Josie's trained her to do as her back is the best sleeping space for a cat.)

Mum was dreaming about her work and in her dream her work announced they were offering back massages to help with stress so my mum said she wanted one - only it wasn't very good. That was because it wasn't a masseuse at all - it was Josie's paws on her back that were in her dream. Josie's very good at walking about and getting comfy but not so good at giving massages.

Anyway there was no time for lying around having massages, real or dreamed ones - I was hungry.

Also, Nahid sends all the Catster cats a big kiss each. Mum told her that you have been purring for Mojo. He had his operation and is doing fine - he's eating and drinking which is the important things but he is not a happy boy and Nahid is still worried about him so please keep up the purrs. Thank you


My mean mum

May 19th 2013 10:40 pm
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Saturday started so well. I had my breakfast, I had a run in the garden, I had snuggles with my mum and then suddenly she got up and ready to leave. I wandered about reminding her about my don't-follow-me-treats and she gave me some but no sooner had I stopped crunching than she grabbed me and in my box I went.

Rest assured I put up a good fight and nearly got away and mum did admit that was harder than she expected but she won. She carried me out to the car, strapped me on and off we went. She put the radio on and it was Cher so we both sang along all the way. I think I sang better.

Then we were there - the VET!!

Luckily it was a civilised waiting room. The only dog was a nine week old puppy and I was bigger than him and all the rest were cats. Mum made rather too much of a fuss of the puppy. She better not have got any ideas.

Anyway the vet was keen to see me and we didn't wait long and the good news is that I am once again pronounced fit and healthy, same weight as last year and the vet said I'm "beautiful". I'm not a girl.

I told my mum I preferred last year's vet who called me "Great". Mum said he didn't call me Great - he was just saying that generally in a happy the cat is healthy kind of way - but he did. He knew magnificence when he saw it.

Back home - I always like to have a good sniff around when I get back in case anything has changed but it hadn't and the rest of the weekend was good. Mum says no more vet for me until next year as long as I stay out of trouble. I will. I do not like vet.


Huge Enormous thank you

May 16th 2013 10:43 pm
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Thank you for all the purring for Mojo as he has his operation today. I will let you know next week how that goes. Nahid is taking a day off work to be with him today.

Also thank you for all our beautiful flowers and gifts. We weren't sure why at first and then we read the messages. We had Mothers Day back in March and this way we got to celebrate it twice.

And I have been a Diary Pick again so thank you for your kind comments on that. I feel wonderfully special. Which is timely as mum and Josie didn't make me feel that way actually.

Yesterday I was out in the garden patrolling for dragons, mice and any other creatures I might meet. I was ready to come indoors so I scrabbled at my door. I sat back and waited for mum to appear and let me in.


Scrabbled again morely. Waited. No sign of anyone.

Scrabbled more urgently and finally there was my mum.

"What took you so long?"

She looked a bit oogly-eyed. "I'm really sorry Toby. Josie and I were listening to my relaxation CD and were too chilled out to move."

"Maybe you didn't hear me the first time," I suggested.

There was an awkward silence.

"What do you need relaxing for anyway?"

"I have been incredibly busy at work, they keep wanting new training sessions and I've had a load of meetings and my head was still whirring when I came in," said mum.

"I have been incredibly busy too," said Josie. "There's toys to fish from the pokey-paw box, several naps to fit in and meal times. My head was still whirring."

Now I can see that Josie does have a busy schedule but I'm not quite sure I believe mum's excuse.


Josie being cosy

May 15th 2013 10:43 pm
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Yesterday evening I was chatting with my mum when Josie strolled in. She jumped up beside my mum and said, "You look very comfy there."

Mum smiled. "Your timing is perfect. I have my book. I have my cup of tea. I have the TV remote. I have nowhere I have to go." Mum patted her legs. "Lap time and no lap top!"

Josie sniffed mum's legs and then went behind mum.

"That's a lovely cushion you're sitting on" she commented.

"Very soft, yes" agreed mum.

"I would like to sit on there too." And Josie started to wiggle behind mum to see how much cushion she could fit on.

Mum sighed and moved across leaving a lovely warmed, soft, mum-scented place for Josie to sleep. Josie was delighted and mum wanted to know why her lap was so desirable when the time was bad but not now. But Josie had falled asleep and couldn't say.

Mum and I had been talking about Nahid. Nahid had phoned my mum to say how much she loved her card. She said it was the most beautiful yet. I'm still glad I didn't sign it though. As Laura-Belle wisely pointed out I might have been agreeing to anything. Maybe Nahid wants me for her cat. Maybe I would be agreeing to give her kitty kisses every day like I do my mum and I'm not sure I would have time besides not knowing the way to her home.

But mum was saying could I ask for my Catster friends to purr for Mojo who is one of Nahid's cats. Tomorrow he has an operation on his thyroid. He's an elderly cat and Nahid is very worried about him so mum promised she would ask for some of our amazingly powerful Catster purrs. So please can you purr for him? Thank you.


Our morning routine

May 14th 2013 10:41 pm
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Normally we wake our mum up and she mutters at us until her clock joins in and then she gets up. She gives us our breakfast and then I go out on patrol while she has her shower and eats her breakfast. By the time I've checked all round the garden and know everything is Ok mum has her muesli finished and I get the rest of the milk while she puts her laptop on her lap and takes my dictation for my diary.

Today it is still too damp to go out so I was ready for my milk early. Instead of being impressed with my efficiency mum kept pushing my head away and saying she hadn't finished with her bowl yet. I thought that was rude.

Then eventually she finished and I got my milk and then out came the laptop. She started typing and all was well - until Josie came up.

"Could I go on your lap?"

Mum looked at the laptop and looked at the cat and said, "Not really. There isn't room."

Josie looked at the laptop and she looked at the lap and decided mum was wrong about that. There was a sliver of lap she could see and she could squeeze on there. So she did and tried hard to lie down in the available room.

Mum pushed the laptop away and is typing this with one hand and clinging on to the laptop with the other. Josie is purring with the pleasure of being there and being right.

Josie does like a lap occasionally. I say laps are for kittens. Mum asked "what are tummy rubs for then?"

"Fierce tigers like me!"

Sometimes we like to change our morning routine.



May 13th 2013 10:37 pm
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We have a thing which is called a dehumidifier. Mostly it sits and hums to itself and doesn't bother anyone. Every now and then it stops and mum takes a load of water out of it and that's about it.

A few weeks ago it started grumbling that it was getting too old. Mum knocked it about a bit and it was Ok but on Sunday the grumbles grew into loud bangy sounds. Mum tried banging back but it kept going.

"That's not good" mum said. And she was right. You couldn't sleep through that.

So yesterday she came home late from work with a brand new one.

She unpacked it and plugged it in and I expect that's the last time I'll ever mention it.

But what I found was the white blocks it came packed in. If I scritched them with a claw they make an amazing squeaking sound. I never heard anything like it and had to keep doing it.

"Toby! Stop that" Mum is no appreciator of the squeak. I tried something new. The texture was sort of soft. If I dug a claw in could I? I could. Bits flaked off. The gift that keeps giving.

But mum stopped me doing that well. She scooped the pieces up and put them out of reach. She said she was worried I would flake a piece off and eat it. As if I would do anything so foolish. Maybe just a nibble to see what it was like but not proper eating.

Meanwhile Josie was adopting the big box that it had come in. We lost the banging of the old dehumidifier to get the banging of tortie cat sliding to the back of a box. Josie gets to keep her box. "For now" said mum. She worries we have too many toys and boxes cluttering up the place. Given how tolerant we are of her chairs and tables and stuff in our way I don't know how she can say that.


Where pawprints go

May 12th 2013 10:42 pm
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On Saturday mum went off scrapbooking. She said it was a good day for craft stuff as the forecast was rain and boy did it rain! We were very happy to be snug and dry indoors.

When mum came back we wanted to see what she had done.

"Did you do a picture of me?" we both wanted to know. And she had done one of each of us so we were both happy. She had also made Nahid's birthday card - now she just needed to write in it.

It had stopped raining so I went out for a mosey round the garden. When I came back in I narrowly missed stepping on something; I had to do an extra long leap in to avoid it. What was that piece of paper doing on the floor anyway?

Mum picked it up and put it down in front of me.

"It's Nahid's card. I would really like you to put a muddy paw print on it. That would be cute."

I sniffed it suspiciously.

"Shouldn't Josie be the one that signs it?" I asked.

Then "OK, you're right." We both know that Josie doesn't go out if there's a risk of getting her paws muddy.

But no. I decided - my paw prints are too precious to stamp at mum's whim. I walked off. Mum moved the card in front of me but I side-stepped it.

Then she picked me up and put me down right on it. No avoiding it this time. Paw right in the middle.

We both looked at the result.

"How did you do that?" asked mum.

I had left a perfect trail of pawprints across the kitchen floor but in the brief spell of conversation and a few steps on the carpet - miraculously dry, clean paws. No paw print.

"You'll have to draw one on like you usually do," I said and off I went leaving mum scratching her head. I can walk far further than that indoors and still leave paw prints on the bed linen. Mum doesn't just leave her signature anywhere, only where she wants it. Same for me and my pawprints.

On another note Mum saw Dee on Sunday and told her how outraged the Catster cats were on her behalf following her ordeal at the paws of scary dog and she is grateful for the purrs. She does have her phone back but her neighbour has not fixed the fence. She has put a bench up against it so the dogs can't jump through but they poke their faces through to see what she is up to and she wishes they wouldn't. Stoopy dogs!!


Brain Train

May 9th 2013 10:35 pm
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We are fond of my mum but she's not clever like a cat and sometimes needs help with the simplest things - recognising meal opportunities for us, understanding basic meows, knowing when the correct time to stop petting us is - that sort of thing.

Anyway she seems to have understood help was needed as she has started a brain training programme. Mostly it is very dull, she clicks and mutters and I'm not sure she's getting any cleverer but yesterday there was a game I liked.

Little fish swim about a pond and mum had to tap them one by one to give them their fish food. They swam all over and she had to keep track of which had already been tapped. Now if you want swimming fish tapping there's one cat you need to call - Me!

Now we've touched on my mum's lack of gratitude for assistance before.

"That one" I would confidently smack the screen.

"Toby! Move your paw. I can't see what I'm doing."

"It's swum away now. It's that one" - another helpful tap.

She pushed my paw off the screen and interesting lights flashed up. The computer knows a genius when it sees one.

So I am not allowed to help brain training any more. Mum will just have to stay puny minded. Luckily she has me and Josie to compensate.


My moth

May 8th 2013 10:40 pm
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Yesterday I played indoors. I played with Da Bird and then Josie and I both chased the red dot and then I spotted something even better. A moth!

I love the way they flitter and flutter and I was going to get this one. Excellent. I left Josie and mum to the red dot thing; I had real prey.

Then it stopped. It flew to the ceiling and just sat there.

"Mum," I called.


"MUM" - a louder meow. She clearly hadn't grasped the urgency of the situation.

She came out into the hall and looked where I looked.


Luckily she had da Bird in her hand and he comes on a long stick. She reached up with the stick and poked the moth and he was off again. Mum went back to her sofa.

Then he stopped flittering again.

"Mum - come and make him flutter"

To be fair to her the first few times she did but the gaps before he stopped again got shorter and I think she got a bit fed up.

"Can't you find your own entertainment?"

"I did. My moth"

"I think he's had enough now. Come back and play with your toys"

But I wanted that moth. If sheer staring could bring a moth down he would have been in my paws. Sadly it can't and then it was bedtime.

I can't find him this morning. Mum says not to worry - there'll be plenty more.

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