Toby's Diary

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I didn't like my weekend

April 7th 2013 10:40 pm
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When mum came home from work on Friday Josie ran to greet her but I held back.

"Are you OK sweetie?" mum asked.

"I have seen terrible things," I replied.

"Maybe supper will make you better," she suggested and that's usually a good idea but I couldn't relax. I kept jumping.

"What has got into you?" asked mum. Josie just shrugged her shoulders and went out leaving mum to try and comfort me as best she could.

Then when mum went to draw the curtains she saw what had happened. There was a big ivy plant growing up the side of the building and a man came to pull it down. I thought he was trying to break into the flat and steal our food, maybe even Da Bird as my most precious thing.

Mum said she knew he was coming but hadn't warned us as she didn't know exactly which day. The reason Josie was Ok is that she's scared of something every day so that's normal for her. I'm usually pretty brave but he sounded like he was attacking the very fabric of our home.

Then on Saturday upstairs had drilling and banging going on. Mum said they were fixing the bathroom so we won't get any more leaks but it was noisy and scary.

Then on Sunday two mystery cats came in our garden and sat and stared in the window. They didn't do anything aggressive, just seeemed to think they would like to come in. Mum said not to worry - she's not letting any more cats in. She reckons two is enough.

It took me quite a lot of cuddles before I could get to sleep last night I can tell you.

Hopefully now it's Monday things will go back to normal again.

 

Mum's question for us

April 4th 2013 10:46 pm
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"Did you come into my life normal cats and go crazy or did I just get the mad ones?" - she was looking at Josie as she asked this but I was in the room so she meant me too.

It's fairly well known that mum and I have our different views of the world and Josie is normally the quiet one but she has her little excursions into the peculier and she was having one last night.

You'll see in my photo Josie in the background perched by the TV and the TV is sitting on a unit. The unit has shelves inside for the box and DVD player only they aren't in there. The engineer gave mum a talk about over-heating appliances last time he came and the DVD player doesn't work.

Mum asked Josie if she can remember why the DVD player doesn't work but Josie doesn't think she can actually. Mum says it's because every time the disc drawer slid in and out Josie tried to catch it and apparently it's not good for disc drives to be tugged back as they try and slide in. Mum did try and stop her but Josie can move fast and from unexpected angles when she needs to.

So anyway the unit has a round hole in the back for all the wires only there aren't any. What had surprised mum last night was Josie's face peering through that hole and a paw sweeping round to see what she could grab from inside the unit. It's all DVDs pretty much so the answer was nothing but that didn't stop Josie continuing to peep in and then reach as far as she could.

And that's what made my mum wonder why her cats aren't the peaceful companions that her friends imagine. Did she get the wrong cats or is it her?

Don't worry - she loves us exactly as we are!!I know that because I keep reminding her.

 

The correct etiquette

April 3rd 2013 10:36 pm
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Mum and I have a disagreement on what the correct etiquette is in a particular situation.

It is still really cold so Josie and I didn't go out for long last night and mum entertained us with a selection of our top toys until we got sleepy. Then Josie settled on mum's lap and I settled on the arm of the sofa next to her and we were the cosiest household in Cosy Town.

I slept for some time and woke up all refreshed and ready but mum was just staring at the TV. She hadn't even noticed me wake up so I grabbed her hand and bit it. Not hard, just to let her know I was awake.

Mum was more surprised than hurt which just shows you how badly she was ignoring me. She said, "ow" and shook her hand and then the disagreement happened.

She said the polite thing to do is to warn of the bite with some tail flicks so she has a chance to move her hand out of the way and give me a toy to attack instead. I say the polite thing to do is to gaze admiringly at me at all times so she will know when I need attention and not need biting.

Josie says cats shouldn't bite the hand that feeds and if we want mum we should give her a gentle head rub or maybe a little lick but she's such a goodie two shoes that I don't listen to her.

So we haven't agreed which is the correct etiquette but I'm pretty sure I'm right.

 

The Grape Escape

April 2nd 2013 10:39 pm
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Mum was boooorrrrriiinnngg last night. She was marking assignments so all she was doing was riffling paper and muttering, "Good. Very good.","You haven't really answered the question," and "Where is Part B? Please tell me you haven't missed Part B." (They had.)

A cat who is honoured with being a Diary Pick should really get all the attention in the home but all I got was the odd head rub and a promise she wouldn't be long.

But I am a resourceful boy and can find my own amusement at such times. I looked around at what else was on the table. Fruit bowl. Hm. What might be in there? Ah, grapes! My favourite fruit. I had fun picking one that wasn't attached to the rest and hoicking it out of the bowl. Then I chased it all around the table and mum laughed so I had her attention. Then it escaped off the table and I jumped down in hot pursuit.

More fun chasing it then on to other toys.

It wasn't until later I saw mum doing something interesting. She was poking around under the chairs and behind the curtain.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Looking for your grape," she replied.

"He's long gone," I told her.

"Grapes don't just go. Where is he?" she wanted to know.

"You have lots of other grapes. Eat one of them. That one's mine." I told her.

But mum said she really wanted to find my grape. She said otherwise time will do its thing and she'll be able to find it from a smell of rotting fruit and a buzz of fruit flies. That sounded like the more interesting option so I left her to it.

The story ends happily. She never did find the grape but she did find one of Josie's toy mice that she had lost. She is going to look again today in the light but he is very well hidden so this could be more fun for us to watch.

Thank you to everyone for your kind messages on me being a Diary Pick. I feel very special.

 

More fun with the jigsaw

April 1st 2013 10:37 pm
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Mum was doing more of her jigsaw yesterday. She was muttering about why on earth had she chosen one with so very many pieces.

Now I am a kindly cat and I could help so I started taking some away so she would have fewer. I even found, now she has more linked together, that by pulling on one I could get a whole string which was brilliant.

Mum wasn't as grateful as you would expect and we got into a game of whacky paw every time she saw me reach for one. Then Josie heard us arguing and came to see what was going on.

She decided to stop the argument completely by plonking herself down in the middle of the jigsaw so mum couldn't do it any more anyway.

Mum laughed at us and said we aren't the restful companions people fondly imagine.

I don't know what she meant. We had been peacefully sleeping some time and were awake and ready for action. Mum persuaded Josie to get up, folded the puzzle away and out came da Bird. Excellent.

Talking of birds I haven't exactly caught an outdoors one yet but I had a good few attempts yesterday. They do keep flying away which many would call cheating but mum calls a very good thing. She is a bit odd sometimes.

 

Spring is springing

March 31st 2013 11:34 pm
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It is still rather cold but Josie and I can both feel Spring in our veins - and we like it!!

We have been remembering some things we liked last Spring. Josie has started asking to have the bath room tap turned on for her to drink from. I've started tearing little bits of wallpaper off the wall. We're both talking more. (I always chat a fair amount to my mum but normally Josie can go weeks without a single meow.)

We're pretty sure we're going to catch a bird this year. There seem to be plenty out there and we have a plan which we have explained to the birds. It hasn't actually worked as yet but we're sure it will. It would help if Josie would come outside to do her part but she reckons it's too cold at the moment so she is more cheerleader from the window for now.

Mum's been doing spring cleaning which we like. She clears stuff off shelves and out of drawers and we jump in. We also like chasing the dusters, especially the feather one.

Best of all mum has yet another bank holiday so is home all day again today. Hoorah!!

 

Bubbles

March 29th 2013 12:28 am
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Mum had stuff with her when she came home from work last night. One was an odd looking tube with a plastic bunny on top.

"What's that?" I asked, giving it a good sniff. I could smell all sorts of things but nothing conclusive.

"It's my Easter tombola prize. There were chocolate eggs and Easter cookies but I won the prize that Josie will like the most. Bubbles."

She is right there. I don't trust bubbles at all. Mum blows on a stick and they just appear out of nothing and then they float about a bit and disappear. What sorcery is this?! Josie gets very excited when she sees bubbles. She chats to them as if they were birds and then sets about to despatch each and every one with a timely paw swipe.

So Josie and mum played bubble chasing and I watched from a safe distance.

Then I sniffed mum's other thing. "Is this one for me if that one's for Josie?"

"Sadly no," mum said, "that's my chocolate egg prize for coming second in the egg decorating competition".

"Did you do any work at work today at all?" - what with tombolas and decorating eggs it doesn't sound like there was much time. She looked a bit embarrassed. "Some".

Mum has promised to go out today and get some of my favourite treats as she and Josie both got a nice thing yesterday. Today is a happy day for all of us. The sun is shining, it's a little bit warmer - the snow is gone - and no office for mum today as it's a bank holiday so she'll be here to pander to our every whims all day. Hoorah!!

and Happy Easter to all my friends.

 

Fans of 5am!!

March 27th 2013 11:46 pm
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Will any cat like to join my Fans of 5am Club? My mum is not a fan. When I try and get her to wake up and properly appreciate it she mutters, "it's five o'clock in the morning. Leave me be" and she tries to hide her head.

Luckily for me she does have to breathe so I can always find a way to sneak a paw in and prod her again.

If she only woke up then we could have a whole hour of snuggles and playtime before she goes to work and I'm sure that would put her in a good mood all day.

It is still real cold here. The sun has been peeking out and making it look warm. I've been fooled a couple of times and gone outdoors but it's just an illusion and my paws get very cold and I have to come in.

Josie surprised us by going out yesterday. Then she barfed up a load of grass so it was a trip of medical necessity. Once she's done the grass thing she feels so good inside that she goes crazy. I would never leave a crazy cat to run up and down alone so I joined in and we got all fuzzy tailed in the thrill of it all. I told mum she should try it too but she just huddled on the sofa and tried to stay out of our way for fear of our manic claws getting her bare feet. People miss out on all the best games.

 

Josie's sticky claw

March 26th 2013 11:42 pm
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Josie was having a nice snooze draped on the back of the chair by the window. Well, you know how it is - the pleasant doze is best followed by the delightful stretch so stretch she did.

Only one claw got hooked on the curtain and she couldn't get it back again. She tried wiggling it side to side, pulling it down...nothing. To lift it up from its place she needed some leverage. Luckily she worked out how to do that. Hook the other paw just above it, that allowed her to pull the fabric tight and unhook claw number one.

Only she now had claw number two stuck only slightly higher. No worries - she knew exactly how to release it. Other claw in just above, pull tight, unhook claw. Ah - now the first claw was once more stuck. Happily she knew how to release that. Claw in just above..

Now I was keen to see just how high Josie would get before realising the fatal flaw in her strategy. Mum has a softer heart than me and went vand unhooked Josie so she could get on with enjoying her evening. She didn't care that she had just spoiled my entertainment.

 

The mighty hunter strikes again

March 25th 2013 11:40 pm
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We were having a very happy evening. Mum was telling me the wonderful news about my diary having been picked once again which is a great honour. Also she was reading out the lovely things that people had said about me in my latest picture. My mum tells me I am handsome but she sort of has to (it comes in a human's job spec when they take on a cat) so I felt very special to hear that from other cats.

Then mum noticed a dark prescence lurking in the back of my lair.

"What's that in your lair Toby?" she asked.

I glanced in. "Some fiendish prey that I caught on my latest hunting trip and brought back for later."

She went closer. "Mind out," I called, "I may have only stunned it. It could come to and strike out."

She reached her hand in and pulled it out.

"Where did you get my sock?" Then she looked at the laundry rack with clothes all hanging to dry and now an odd number of socks. "Oh I see."

"It took some subduing that one but I was fearless," I told her. "You don't know what happens when you aren't here to supervise."

Anyway mum decided to ignore my warnings and dice with danger and the sock is now back hanging with its mate on the rack. But it had better not try anything again. Mum was lucky I was here to capture it the
last time!

 
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