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Toby's Diary

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October 22nd 2016 12:31 am
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My mum was reading the paper. "Ah," she said, "That's so cute. Apparently dogs dream of their owner's faces."

There was a pause and you could see the cogs turning.

"Do I feature in your dreams?"

Josie purred and gave my mum a head rub. Soppy cat.

I dream about fighting dragons and saving the planet from werewolves.

"Do you dream about us?" I asked my mum.

She thought too long. "It's not a hard question," I pointed out.

"I was trying to remember," she said. It shouldn't be too hard.

"Probably. At night anyway. I think about you both a lot in the day."

Hm. That was probably a satisfactory answer.


My mum went away

October 20th 2016 10:58 pm
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She had to really. She had a bad cold and every time she sneezed Josie nearly jumped out of her fur.

I had a stern conversation with Josie before my mum came back. "What is it that you must remember?"

"Be cool."

That's right. My mum must be punished for abandoning us.

Was Josie cool? No. Josie never quite grasped that concept. She ran all over everywhere and has been on mum's lap whenever possible since my mum returned.


Josie was tired

October 9th 2016 10:26 pm
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On Saturday my mum was being busy and I was helping and Josie was sleeping. She nestled herself under the throw and you wouldn't know she was alive except every now and then we would see the throw move.

When my mum settled on the sofa for the evening Josie emerged from her cocoon, had a really good stretch, then joined my mum, curling up on her tray.

"You must be really exhausted after all that sleeping," said my mum. Josie agreed that she was and snuggling her head into her paws, settled down for a few more hours.

Anyway all that sleep certainly paid off. Josie was in full blown Tigger mode on Sunday morning, bouncing here, there and every where. She looked like she was having such fun I joined in. We all went in the kitchen and asked to go outside and my mum said, "No breakfast?" but all we wanted to do was run so we did. Sometimes I like having a sisfur!


Indoor Games

October 5th 2016 10:21 pm
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Now it is a bit colder outside we expect our mum to step up and entertain us indoors.

I was clawing at the rug until she made it into a tunnel for me to chase balls down. That's a top game. Then Josie made up a new one where my mum threw bits of scrumpled paper on our cube and Josie knocked them off. It looked like fun but I wasn't going to play because it was Josie's idea.

So I ran to and fro until my mum got the idea and got my laser pointer out.

You feel sad because summer is gone and then you remember how much fun autumn can be!! Plus we're coming up to international Toby appreciation day. I start seeing pictures of me everywhere. They don't remember my white patch, it's just black cats on things, but I am grateful that they try.


More signs of autumn

October 3rd 2016 9:48 pm
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I heard a conversation that I last heard some months ago. My mum came in the room and looked at Josie.

"Josie - was someone else sitting where you are now?"

Josie considered this. No, she was pretty sure the seat was empty when she took it.

"And just seconds before?"

Josie snuggled a little deeper into the cushion in the manner of a cat who has been there a while. No, she definitely had not stolen anyone's seat.

My mum took her cup of tea and sat at the other end of the sofa, casting resentful glances at Josie as she went. They would have been even more resentful if she had seen just how swiftly Josie had moved into the vacated position muttering, "Yes! Warm spot!!" as she settled into it.

No cat likes to be cold but Josie takes this dislike to an extreme.


I've been thinking about words

October 2nd 2016 9:44 pm
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On Saturday morning it was raining so my mum went off on a historical walking tour of London. That's outside in the rain when she has a perfectly good home to be in, all dry. I will never understand her.

Anyway it ended up at Hodge's house. I never met Hodge as he lived a very long time ago but he was a fine cat, a very fine cat indeed. We know this because his dad said so. That was a man called Samuel Johnson who wrote a book called a dictionary.

My mum loves a dictionary or any books about words. Now if cats had a dictionary it would be much shorter. With us it's all in the tone. 'Meow' can mean my bowl is empty or I require the door to be opened or to scritch my head now depending how I say it.

"Basically all instructions for me," commented my mum.

"Yes." If she did her job properly I wouldn't have to talk at all.

"I expect you would though," said my mum.

I expect I would indeed. Everyone is entitled to my opinion. But it won't happen as sadly, despite my excellent use of tone and clear enunciation' my mum persists in misunderstanding me.


I am an extremely brave cat

September 29th 2016 10:10 pm
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There was a knock on the door yesterday. Josie is not brave so she ran and hid. My mum opened the door and it was Paul from next door with some tomatoes from their garden for her. (Bizarrely she likes them.)

He said "Hello Toby" so I came into the hall so he could admire me.

Now Paul has told my mum some bad lies about how I am a scaredy cat when she is away and run out when I hear him come in. Clearly my mum could see this was untrue. There I was, all sociable and brave.

"That's because his mum's here," commented Paul. Luckily my mum knows I am always extremely brave. (Oh - she says I'm not always brave. Sometimes I do disappear when people come but that is because I am bravely scouting out the best hiding spots in case anyone else isn't feeling as brave as I am and needs them)

My mum was late back from her dance class last night. She has a friend who is sad so they went for a drink.

"Does she have a cat?" I asked.

"No," said my mum.

No wonder she is sad. They need to go to the cat rescue centre, not the pub, to cheer her up


My not bright mum

September 28th 2016 10:17 pm
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You can't buy the wrong kitty litter, then cover it with a thin layer of the right kitty litter and expect us not to notice. As my mum did!

For the first thing we do is dig and there is was - horrid large stones, concealed beneath a layer of the good stuff. I can't believe she thought we would ever fall for that. Even Josie noticed.



Josie had something important to say

September 21st 2016 10:09 pm
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When I am happy I purr. When my mum must do something to make me happy I tell her. Firmly. Alas, she makes a lot of mistakes so it is true that I say a lot. It is for her own good.

Josie, on the other hand, rarely meows. She has a touching albeit misguided faith in my mum's ability to do the right thing without guidance.

But last night, as we all slept, Josie broke out the meow. She had something very important to tell my mum.

"What is it?" My mum was too surprised to be grumpy.

"I want to play," said Josie, pouncing on mum's knee, to demonstrate what she had in mind.


"Yes," and she scuttled off, delighted with herself.

My mum looked at me, (curled up my chair like the well-behaved cat that I am), and I looked at her.

I shrugged my shoulders. I have no idea what goes through that cat's mind and she's definitely getting weirder.


It must be autumn

September 19th 2016 10:31 pm
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Last week it was still summer and we were all toasty and hot. Then the rain came and washed summer away, literally overnight, and now it is autumn.

One real sign of autumn - yesterday Josie climbed onto mum's lap. She hasn't done that since Spring.

Being Josie she chose a really bad time. My mum had supper on the stove. To be fair you could see my mum weighing up whether burned supper was a price worth paying for Josie's comfort (but concluding the subsequent kitchen fire wouldn't make anyone comfortable and Josie had to move).

My best thing about autumn - my mum is back in her big fluffy robe in the mornings. I love to purr and paddy paw on that. I do try with her light summer robe but it isn't nearly so satisfying and my mum goes all "Ow! Your claws," whereas they just sink in her fluffy one and she can't feel them so we're both happy.

I love summer but there are definitely good things about autumn too.

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