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Simone's say MRAT!

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the creepies in my mind

May 23rd 2011 10:50 am
[ Leave A Comment | 27 people already have ]

Hello kitties,

Last night was a rough night for me, and I still don't know why. Mommy and daddy were gone all of yesterday because they were out having funs or something like that. When they came home we pretty much all went straight to bed. Well let me tell you, there was SOMETHING in that house last night. I don't know what it was, but something had me super spooked. I was all poofed up big and scary, I was crying in fear, I curled up in the closet nook and trembled. All of this happened at around 3 in the morning. I woke mommy up and she was so scared for me. She brought in the nom noms and brother and locked all of us in the bedroom/bathroom area with her. She closed off the closet and brought me to bed with her. She didn't know why I wasn't snuggling with them like I usually do so she held me in her arms and I trembled and cried and whimpered. I wasn't hurt, I was scared. Mommy didn't know what I was scared of and she and daddy were really worried about me.

Eventually being locked in the little space paid off. River came and slept by mommies head so he could keep an eye on me and mommy and daddy let me sleep between them. There doesn't seem to be anything wrong and I'm fine now, but I was so scared last night at 3am. What do you think it was kitties?

Just so you all don't get too worried though... I'll still give you a french lesson today!

Today we will be learning about

Les quartre Aliments de Base Chat = The four cat food groups!
Or in other words... the four groups of nom noms!

Une: = One:
La Bouffe Granulee = The Dry Food
The dry food is ok but it's not my favorite...

Deux: = Two:
Les Conserves = The canned food
yummy yummy yummy in my tummy tummy tummy! NOM NOM tastic!

Trois: = Three:
Les Vivres Fraiches = The 'natural' foods
I'm pretty sure these are the things River wants to catch and eat...
L'Oiseau = The Bird
La Souris = The Mouse
Le Poisson = The Fish
La Vilaine Grosse Bestiole = The Big Ugly Bug
I think that last one is River's favorite, he's always trying to eat La Vilaine Grosse Bestiole!

And finally our last food group...
Quatre: = Four:
Les Aliments Tabous = The Forbidden Foods
We've all had our run ins with Les Aliments Tabous! Which one is your favorite?
L'Elastique = The Rubber Band
Le Bout de Ficelle = The Piece of String
La Composition de Fleur Sechees = The Dried Flower Arrangement
Le Trombone = The Paperclip
Les Cheveux d'Ange = The Tinsel
La Plante en Pot = The Potted Plant
Les Aliments Qu'On a Laisses Sans Surveillance sur la Table = The food left unguarded on the table!

I think my favorite is either Le Bout de Ficelle or Les Aliments Qu'On a Laisses Sans Surveillance sur la Table! What about you kitties?


Rainy days make my belly blue

May 17th 2011 5:01 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 16 people already have ]

... in oh so many ways kitties. Oh do these rainy days make my belly chilly and sad. It's all dark and rainy out right now and I'm sulking in the closet. There's a great little nook mommy made for us at the way back of the closet where we can hide. If people come into the house who we don't want to see or if we are stressed out we can go back here and feel nice and safe. She just bought us a new tent that has glow in the dark stars on it to put back here as well to help build up the safe nook for us. The best part about the nook though? It's really easy to warm up cause it's so small and safe and there are so many blankets! It's nice and cool in the summer and easy to warm up in the winter!

Anyways... enough about my great nook! The point is, I'm back here trying to warm up all day. I want the sun to come back. Mommy is thrilled about all the rain, she says we need it. She also hopes the heat stays away until at least June, apparently the AC bill is very high in the summer and she hates having to turn it on so she wants to get in all the water we can before the heat wave rolls in. I disagree! I want sun mommy! I NEED SUN! I'm waiting for my sun to come back mommy... I'm so cold!

The only good part of the day was that this is the one week mommy is taking off before she dives into full work again. This is her reward for finishing up graduate school, 1 week. She slept SOOOOOOOOOOOO late this morning and I was right there with her. It was THE BEST! Mommy won't admit how long she slept because she is embarrassed about it, she thinks she wasted the day. I say that's silly... sleeping is NOT wasting the day, am I right kitties? Here's hoping she sleeps in again tomorrow and doesn't wake up early... I love a good warm bed!

and now... as promised, your French Lesson for this diary entry! All of these phrases are pulled right from my new book, "French for Cats" Let's all learn some great French together!

What do we call a dog in French?
Le Mauvais Chien = the bad dog!

What do we ask our parents to do about Le Mauvais Chien?
Je vous en prie, tuez le chien (de la maison d'a cote) = Please kill the dog (next door (in case it's a neighbors dog you want to get rid of!))

How do we make sure this happens? By using another enemy of the beloved cat!
L'Enfant Mechant - The Mean Child

All you have to do to get your parents to get rid of the dog is...
Je Voudrais que le mauvais chien morde l'enfant mechant = I wish the bad dog would bite the mean child

next time, let's discuss the different groups of nom noms!


Mommy got me a weird present...

May 15th 2011 12:33 pm
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Hello kitties (or should I say Bonjour!)

Mommy brought me a very weird present yesterday that she found at a little shop downtown. It's a book. I know, what could a kitty possibly need with a book? Well... this is a special book written just for kitties! It's called "French for cats; all the French your Cat will ever need to know". I guess mommy wants me to learn the language of the origin of my name!

You see kitties, three years ago before mommy and daddy moved to CA and adopted me and brother they were going to move to Paris, France. Things changed and daddy took the job in CA instead, but they never gave up on wanting to move to Europe someday. Now, of course, so long as we have River in our family that won't happen. Because of River's FIV he can't cross national borders without being confiscated, and mommy and daddy would never ever in a million years part with River. They didn't intend to adopt a kitty that couldn't travel internationally but they bonded with River so I guess we're keeping him (despite the fact that he just ran across the keyboard while mommy was typing MY diary and put in all these funny letters she had to remove later!) I might be a cranky gal sometimes, but overall I'm happy we're keeping River. He's my brofur and I love him! I guess I still get to learn French though, just in case they ever change the laws and let River travel!

I've decided to take it upon myself to teach you kitties some French too, cause this is one handy little book let me tell you! It covers everything, and I do mean EVERYTHING a kitty would need to know! So, from now on, prepare yourselves for a French lesson at the end of all my diary entries and we can all learn to whine at our parents in more than one language! hehehe!

Bye bye for now kitties from Simone the Siamese

or... in French Simone le Siamois!

(Next time stay tuned for instructions on how to get rid of the dog... in French!)


please purr for a little lost soul

May 12th 2011 12:31 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 22 people already have ]

Oh kitties, I have some very sad news to report. Mommy made sure to write River's entry first today because he has happy news, I am taking on the burden of reporting some very sad news.

Today mommy was driving in early in the morning to give her students their final exam. She was approaching the campus when she saw a little black kitty dart out from behind a parked car. A silver car driving past him hit him and kept going. Mommy slammed on the breaks and jumped out of the car. How could you keep driving? It wasn't necessarily this driver's fault. Sometimes bad things happen by accident. Sometimes people hit people by accident, let alone little kitties, but why wouldn't you stop? Mommy ran over to the little kitty. Kitty was not in good shape. This poor beautiful little black kitty was gone within seconds. The driver never stopped their car and the driver's behind mommy got all angry at her for blocking traffic. Mommy had tears in her eyes. She took kitty into the car and drove into a parking lot to stop. Kitty was hit right in front of a bunch of apartments and he looked like he might have had a family somewhere. Someone hit beautiful kitty and took him away from his family and didn't even stop their car. They were going to leave his little kitty shell on the pavement behind a parked car. What if kitty had been alive still and could have been saved? Mommy wrapped kitty in a towel she had in the trunk of the car and took a picture of kitty with her phone. She went to the apartment manager's office on the grounds and asked if they had anyone with a kitty like him. They didn't think so but they said they'd take kitty. Mommy was very reluctant to let kitty go, she wanted to make sure that if he had a family they knew what happened to him and didn't have to spend days searching for him never to find him, or worse yet, find his little body dumped in a trash can. The girl working the desk seemed genuinely concerned with kitty though and promised to bury him over by the river if he didn't have a home. Mommy relented and handed over kitty's little body. Poor kitty. She gave a description of the car but since she only got a few numbers on the plate and the vague model she doubts anything will ever happen. Hitting kitties with cards isn't even a crime in lots of places, even if you drive away like that.

Poor little kitty. Mommy wanted to take him to the vets to see if he had a microchip but she had to go give the exams. She hopes the girl behind the desk will do that. Mommy begged her to. She said if she couldn't do it, mommy would find the time to. She promised to do it. I hope she does it. I hope if kitty has a family they find out what happened to him. It may hurt, but it would be better than never knowing. The girl at the desk had a picture of her boyfriend and their puppy on her desk. Hopefully she knows what it feels like to love an animal and will do the right thing for kitty.

Can you all please take a moment to purr for kitty? He died this morning around 8am on the road by the university in Sacramento. Please purr for him kitty. Purr that he is at peace and that his family will know what happened to him. If he doesn't have a family, purr that he is at peace now at the rainbow bridge. All you bridge kitties, please go find him. He was a beautiful little black kitty. Find this kitty and tell him mommy is sorry she couldn't save him. Take care of him bridge kitties. Take care of the little kitty who was killed by a thoughtless human early this morning by the university. Help him up to the bridge and play with him. If he has no family, tell him to find Dinah and Eva, they'll watch over him until one day mommy can help him cross the bridge himself. Poor little kitty.


The dreaded double kitty hug.... of doom!

May 7th 2011 7:27 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 12 people already have ]

That's right kitties, the dreaded double kitty hug of doom. That's what I had to suffer yesterday. It was horrible. Allow me to explain to those of you who have never suffered in such a way.

Mommy had her last exam on Friday for her graduate degree. She was so worried when she left. 2 hours later she came home practically dancing and the VERY first thing she did... run right over to me and scoop me up. That's ok, I like being hugged by mommy... by MYSELF! The problem was, she started squeezing me and snuggling me and then she saw River and scooped him up in the OTHER arm and hugged both of us. Our butts were bumped together and mommy was kissing both of our cheeks. It was so horrible. The double hug. I don't share my mommy hugs with any brofur no matter how adorable everyone thinks he is. Icky icky icky double hugs of doom. I guess mommy must have done well on the test. I had to spend the rest of the day dodging her and running from room to room so she wouldn't hug me like that again. River was so stupid he just kept prancing right up to her for the attention. If I didn't know any better, I'd swear he liked that experience! So unbearably gross!

Don't worry kitties... I got back at her last night by taking over her whole pillow. I just tucked myself right under the blankets and rested my head on the pillow next to her, when she woke up this morning, I was still under the blankets but my head was in the center of the pillow and she had NO pillow. he he he! Evil Moe Moe giggles! I showed her!


I'm not THAT spoiled am I?

May 2nd 2011 1:24 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 19 people already have ]

Oh dear me kitties, let me tell you, I made that mommy of mine awfully mad at me last night! She was out at the gym last night at dinner time and she ended up staying late because she was waiting for the president's confirmation to the news last night and she couldn't get off the elliptical because that's where the TV was. So, needless to say, she got home late and I was waiting for her at the door DEMANDING my nom noms. How dare she make dinner late when I'm on a diet?

So anyways, before she showered she fed us. Or at least, she thought she fed us. She came back out and I was sitting glaring at the food bowls. She gave me my calorie control diet and she gave us our one pouch of good nom noms. Since we are easing onto this diet she figures she shouldn't pull all the good stuff right away. Turns out, she accidentally bought a bunch of flavor River and I don't like. We REFUSED to eat it. She said we were being cry babies and ridiculous about it and she wasn't going to change the food. I said... I WANT LUNA TUNA!!!

Well she tried to ignore us, she watched some tv, had a late dinner, and then mommy and daddy tried to go to bed. No dice mommy. I don't get luna tuna, you don't get sleepies! I walked up and down in front of the bed yelling at her. "mrat... Mrat... MRAAAAT!!! mreep mrap mrrrrrrrrrrrrat!" She finally couldn't take it anymore and she got out of bed making all kinds of angry noises about how insane we were behaving. She walked out and put the icky flavor outside for the stray and got us a fresh bowl! We promptly chowed down and then joined them for sleepies!

Daddy laughed at how silly we were all be having and mommy growled at us, but she still let me sleep on her butt, so I guess it's all ok! hehehe! A Moe Moe gets, what a Moe Moe wants!

I still don't think I'm THAT spoiled though, do you kitties?


A DDP for me!!!!

April 30th 2011 1:28 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 15 people already have ]

HOORAY! I'm so happy now that I'm a DDP today! Thanks so much diary gal and catster! hehehe! Sorry to all the kitties who read my entry yesterday and thought that someone had gone to the bridge. I didn't mean to scare you kitties, I just really think a diet is the worst thing in the world. I woke mommy up this morning by sitting on her pillow yelling at her for more food... needless to say the attempt backfired and I DID NOT get more nom noms. Sigh. Oh well... when I lose this weight I'm so jumping up on the table to get River's delicious food up there!

Anyways, thanks to all you kitties who sent me presents and messages and comments. You're all the best! Some day mommy will be able to come back to Catster more so we can play, I hope it's real soon cause I love and miss you all so much!


oh nose... not again

April 29th 2011 5:31 pm
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Oh kitties, it's a sad sad day. I have sad sad news to report. Sigh. I wish I didn't have to tell you this kitties, it makes my little eyes water just thinking about it but I must, it is important you all know this. My mommy... has put me... back on my diet.

I know, you can't believe it can you? There's no way to prepare for the news when it is that bleak. What can you do about it? I'm so horrified to even have to say it myself. Mommy says I'm just too much of a chunk munk these days. (Apparently chunky monkey wasn't degrading enough - she had to shorten it!) Mommy told me she loves me very much and she wants me to live a very long life so I have to take off some pounds. She got worried about me because the other day I was having some *blushes* problems reaching a sensitive area to clean. I'm a lady so I won't elaborate on that but suffice to say mommy saw me and said that that was the last straw. It's time to lose some weight. I'm back on less than a cup of calorie control diet from my vet a day and she is allowing me to split a pouch of my favorite wet food with River a day. (Mostly because River steals my diet control food grrrrrrrr!)

River gets all his delicious gravy soaked nom noms up on the table now. That's right... she's letting that BROTHER of mine eat off the TABLE like he's a PEOPLES! I can't believe the insult. Just because River doesn't have to lose weight doesn't mean you should taunt me like this. I don't like jumping that high because of my lack of front claws. GRRRRRRRR again to the people who declawed me before mommy and daddy found me. Is there no END to the suffering I must endure?

I'll keep you kitties updated about my weight loss. I hope I lose it all fast. I don't want this diet thing to go on forever. I HATE dieting. I HATE the idea of my belly getting smaller, that will mean LESS belly TO RUB! Do you hear me kitties? She wants LESS MOE MOE BELLY TO RUB!!! Oh... the inhumanity!


You make my Moe Moe Heart so full!

April 25th 2011 4:44 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 10 people already have ]

Oh kitties!

I just had to hop online and say how excited I am! My last two diary entries were a little bit of a call to arms, and the Catster community responded so fantastically that I can't even believe it! So many of you went and voted down that dog hater in the video game cover contest and today we checked in on Vern's auction, we can't believe it! Our catnip toys are all ready pulling in some really great bids!

We are so proud of you kitties! So much money is being raised right now for Vern, and we are so happy we are helping. Is it wrong that we feel bad though every time a friend gets out bid by another friend for the toys? Hehehe! I just wanted to thank all of you though for bidding in the auction and helping earn money for Vern! For anyone who hasn't seen it, here's the link to the facebook page. If you aren't on facebook but still want to help out the little guy, I think Finney and Lacey's mommy can help you out, or you can contact Vern's mommy directly!

Vern's Facebook Auction

Vern's Catster Page

I'm so proud of all you kitties and all the help you are willing to offer to those in need. GREAT BIG PURRS for all of you! Thanks so much for making me and my family proud to be on Catster!

P.S. keep bidding on our catnip toys! hehehe! Remember, it's for Vern!

P.P.S. Mommy has taken some very adorable and some not so flattering pictures of me recently that she wants to upload onto Catster with some new colors behind me! As soon as she's motivated to deal with the new picture uploaded again, look for those! hehehe! I KNOW you all want to see more pictures of my beautiful BELLIES!!! hehehe!


Vern's Auction

April 22nd 2011 4:47 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 11 people already have ]

Hi kitties,

I know I promised you all my next diary updated would be about my beautiful belly in the sun, but I found something a little more important to discuss with you. But just so you know I'm a kitty of my word...

I, the Princess Moe Moe toes, have the most beautiful belly in the world! This is why I'm always eating, it's a masterpiece and I must continue to work on it to keep it in the perfect shape it has achieved! Maximum belly rubbing space! hehehe! I've been sunning this beautiful belly all morning long with my brofur in our great big green bed my mommy made us! I'm one happy snuggled up Princess! HOORAY!

Now, back to the important matters at hand! Many of you know the little kitty Vern. He's having a second auction to help out with his medical bills on Facebook. You can read about it on his diary page, but suffice to say he has some serious medical problems and some serious medical bills. You should all go over to facebook and check out his auction. Me and mommy have donated some stuff to the auction! We donated a big bunny foot kicker, a mousie, a heart, and a big pillow toy! So.... if you didn't win anything in our last quiz game you can still get yourself a catnip toy AND help out a little kitty in need! I also heard a rumor that there was one of the last remaining and ever so precious Hazel Lucy hats in the auction. This item is priceless, and Hazel Lucy's mommy so generously donated it to help out little Vern and his medical bills. There's lots of good stuff there, go check it out kitties and bid generously! If you've got nothing to give, at least go visit Vern and send him some lovies and think warm thoughts for him and purr generous purrs. He needs them kitties.

Vern's Auction on Facebook

Thanks so much kitties!!! Remember, there are some extra special toys in that auction, they will be custom made for the winner and me and mommy are taking care of the shipping! Go bid kitties! Go bid right now! hehehe!

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