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28 Dirty Cat Jokes for Adults to Make You Laugh

By Kristin Hitchcock
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Gray cat laughing with mouth open

Cats are absolutely hilarious if the rise of cat videos has any bearing. While cat jokes don’t touch on the real thing, they can still be funny. Memorize a few to keep up your sleeve for the next dinner party.

Some are on the “dirty” side, while others are more harmless. No matter what tone you’re going for, we’ve included many great options below!

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The 28 Dirty Cat Jokes

1. Teen Cat

Why did the teenage cat get sent to his room? He had a lousy cat-titude.

young woman playing with her cat
Image by: Olezzo, Shutterstock

2. Cat Sports

What’s a cat’s favorite sport? Hairball.


3. Cat Police

What do you call a cat police force? Claw enforcement.


4. Dirty Litterboxes?

What did the cat say to the dirty litter box? “I can’t believe you’ve gone this long without a bath!”

grey cat sitting behind green litter tray
Image by: New Africa, Shutterstock

5. Cats & Eggs

How do cats like their eggs? Hairy-side up!


6. Adults-Only

Why did the cat join a strip club? Because it had purr-fect moves!


7. Cats’ Favorite Colors

What’s a cat’s favorite color? Purrple.

chinchilla cat sitting at the window
Image by: ZAHRA22, Shutterstock

8. No Climbing Allowed

Why are cats afraid of trees? Because of their bark!


9. A Traditional Knock, Knock Joke

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kitten. Kitten who? Quit kitten around and open the door!


10. Cats and Vets Just Don’t Get Along

Why did the cat get a bad review at the vet? He had purrsistent pawblems.

ginger cat being examined by a vet
Image by: Andy Gin, Shutterstock

11. Never Shave a Cat

Why did the cat get a haircut? He wanted to get his mane attraction back.


12. Cats Can’t Read

Why did the cat go to the library? To get a paws-itive review of a new book.


13. Lemons

Why did the cat refuse to eat lemons? Because they made him sour and grumpy, just like a sour-puss.

cat sitting beside a lemon tree
Image by: Kit Leong, Shutterstock

14. Cats Love Tuna

What made the cat upgrade his phone? The tuna can opener app kept crashing.


15. What Do Cats Say After…

What did the cat say after making a joke? Just kitten!


16. Cat Accountants

What was the reason for the cat to consult an accountant? It happened because they were embroiled in a purramid scheme.

tabby cat sitting on the deck
Image by: garageofh, Shutterstock

17. Cats and Computers Don’t Mix

How do you know your cat used your computer? Your mouse has teeth marks.


18. Dogs and Cats

What kind of dog doesn’t bark? A meowsehound!


19. Talking Cats

What’s smarter than a talking cat? A spelling bee!

close up cat meowing
Image by: Oscar Wiedemeijer, Shutterstock

20. Cat Pregnancy

Why did the mother cat suspect that she was pregnant? Because her pregnancy test came back 'pawsitive'.


21. Cat Music

What song do kittens always request at dances? “Mice Mice Baby.”


22. Cats Don’t Do Laundry for a Reason

What do cats call a big pile of laundry? They call it a “meowtain” to climb.

blue maine coon cat inside the laundry basket
Image by: Nils Jacobi, Shutterstock

23. Cats are Indecisive

Why are cats bad at making decisions? They become so purrr-plexed.


24. Grumpy Cats Abound

What did the grumpy cat say to the sunshine? Don’t bother, I’m making my own.


25. Ever Seen a Cat Playing a Video Game?

What do you call a cat who loves video games? A clawmaster.


26. Cats Fight!

Have you ever wondered how cats put an end to their fights? They hiss and make up.

two-cats-armwrestling-fight-battle
Image by: Nils Jacobi, Shutterstock

27. What Does Your Cat Look At?

What’s a cat’s favorite publication? Good Mousekeeping!


28. Cats at School?

Why did the cat go to school? To improve its mice-reading skills.

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Final Thoughts

Hopefully one of these jokes made you laugh! These one-liners are great for memorizing, allowing you to pull them up whenever a joke is needed. Plus, because they’re all cat-themed, they’re perfect to share with other cat-lovers.

See also:


Featured Image Credit: Svitlana Sen, Shutterstock

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Kristin Hitchcock
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