Kittens, Adoption & Loss: Navigating Happy and Hard Times

Welcome to the Wednesday Cats of Catster! Every week, we share a story from one of our cat-loving Catsters. This week is about Isabel and her sassy rescue, Milly.

Last month, I shared the story of when my dearest cat, Milly, accidentally became a teenage mom, and I became a midnight midwife! I officially became a proud grandmother of 5 adorable kittens during a nationwide lockdown caused by the Covid-19 global pandemic in 2020.

Now, I’m sharing the story of how the kittens helped us cope with lockdown, the hard decision we made saying goodbye to two of Milly’s babies and the heart-breaking event of losing Tommy…

The Rollercoaster From Crazy Town: Lockdown

Depending on where you found yourself during this time, lockdown may have looked very different for people from different countries.

In Italy, lockdown started with balcony opera concerts and people cheering in unison. Then, pasta stockpiles ran dangerously low, and suddenly, Nonna became the most powerful figure in the household. By week four, everyone was making their own wine and debating if the virus could be defeated with enough olive oil.

In the US, lockdown meant different things depending on which state you were in. Some were barricading their doors, while others were throwing house parties in defiance. Supermarkets became battlegrounds over hand sanitizer, and conspiracy theories spread faster than the virus itself. Meanwhile, TikTok thrived as people baked sourdough bread as if their lives depended on it.

Brits stockpiled tea, biscuits, and—unnecessarily—toilet paper. The Queen reassured the nation while people queued at Tesco in perfect, socially distanced silence. “Working from home” translated to wearing a shirt for video calls but absolutely no trousers. The great national debate? Whether one could claim a daily walk and a trip to Tesco as separate outings.

I was in South Africa during lockdown, and boy, was it wild. First, they banned alcohol. Then, they banned tobacco. The entire nation went into collective mourning. Homemade pineapple beer became the currency of the underground, while WhatsApp groups turned into black markets for overpriced brandy and cigarettes. Braais (BBQs) were illegal, but somehow, you could still smell them at 2 am.

Bizarre times! Today, it all just feels like a weird fever dream, as if none of it could even be possible… And with all the silly things that happened during lockdown also came a lot of scary, concerning and uncertain times. I for one, found myself to be extremely concerned about whether life would ever return to what it once was. Or was this the beginning of the end?

I had just graduated from University, and I was so excited to head into the world, then bam! Nationwide lockdown. I felt quite depressed and worried about what the future might bring. If it wasn’t for Milly and her 5 babies, my lockdown would have looked very different.

The Best Lockdown Medicine: Kittens

As you may remember from my previous post, helping Milly bring new life into this world was the most insane experience I’ve ever had as a cat owner. It was scary and beautiful and unexpected and it came as if it was sent from above. Our 5 little furry dopamine dispensers really helped to lift the gloom and doom that the pandemic incited.

After giving birth, Milly and the babies spent some quality time together. Thankfully, all the babies were born 100% healthy, and there were no major complications.

Let me start by introducing the clowder of kittens!

This is Shelby, or Shelbelina, or Noosie (said in the highest pitched voice possible). She’s the eldest. If you read my previous post about the night I became an accidental midwife for Milly, you might recall the kitten my sister had to pull out of the birth canal and into the world by her little back paw – this is her. She is the sweetest, most shy, and most beautiful little girl. Such a little lady with the softest little meows you ever heard. And she looks the most like her mother!

Then there was Tommy, or Tommelino(s). Pitch black with the most glorious white mustache and socks you’ve ever seen. He was a true gentleman. Such beauty and poise. He wasn’t fond of petting, even head scratchies and bum pats. The only place you could pet him was very gently on his mustache with only one cautious finger. He loved that. He is unfortunately no longer with us… He was taken too soon, and his absence still weighs heavy on our hearts… More about Tommelino a little later.

Next up, we have Alfie. He was a chonky baby. And boy, could he meow. He didn’t meow often, but when he did, it was long and serious. Those were the longest meows I’ve ever heard from a newborn kitten. He was just a happy go-lucky little dude.

The second youngest is Basil. He was about 72% white and cute as a button. Unlike his older brother Alfie, he meowed a lot. He felt the need to tell everyone exactly how he was feeling at any given moment. Especially when food is involved in some way or another. We loved him dearly. He and Alfie were very close from day one; brothers and besties.

Even though our youngest little nugget, Miley or “Kleintjie,” was technically Basil’s uncertified twin sister, she was more of a loner from the start. She was the smallest, hence the Afrikaans nickname “Kleintjie,” which loosely translates to “small one.” It almost looks like she’s smiling, so her name actually came from calling her smiley Miley. She’s the sweetest little girl. She’s naturally quite thin and lanky, almost like a Greyhound. She loves nibbling (not suckling) on fingers with her back teeth; it’s hilarious and adorable and a little mysterious. I’ve never seen a cat do that before. She’s the cutest, quirkiest little cat!

Lockdown was a wild time. Everyone had completely different and unique experiences during those times; some had it good, some had it okay, and some people had it bad. However different all our lives were, it was also similar in many weird, wacky ways. The uncertainty got to me sometimes. It felt unreal to think about the future and not know at all what it would look like or how life will turn out now that there was a global pandemic and nationwide lockdown regulations underway in almost every country.

The kittens really helped by distracting us and easing the uncertainty and stress during these surreal times. They were the most adorable little kittens. Five little Millys, each with a little bit of her and a lot of their own pizazz. They provided us with endless entertainment, laughs, and positivity. They grounded us. Reminded us of reality and life and nature. Of growth and happiness. I cannot begin to imagine going through lockdown without them and, of course, the queen herself, Milly.

Which brings me to the next part of today’s story: how friggen adorable Milly was as a lil mama! Still very much a sassy, fiery Aries, but with a lot of natural motherly instincts. It was the cutest thing. She was so good with them. Firm, yet gentle. Serious and playful. They were obsessed with her. After a couple of months, she got really fed up with their raging preoccupation with her milk-making abilities. She was done. And then she kind of just went on with her life as they grew older. Not super involved, letting them grow and explore the world with her very relaxed supervision and all the help.

Milly was lucky, she had the village. About 7 cats and 5 and a half human co-parents (spread across two houses on a big yard). We all raised these little babies during a time when we were legally required to stay home, so it was kinda perfect. We could be around them all the time. It was a win-win situation and no one complained. I’d go back any day. For the kitten experience, not the whole end-of-the-world situation, of course.

One of the toughest decisions of my life

So, we already had 8 cats before the kittens came. As a cat lover, having 13 cats is awesome! As a cat lover in lockdown, having 13 cats was expensive and a really big commitment. After a lot of sums, alternative solutions, and deliberation, we came to an agreement that we needed to find a wonderful and loving forever home for 2 of the kittens.

Miley was very attached to me, and I have a really special place in my heart for her. I wouldn’t have been able to break our bond. Tommy and Shelby were really close, and both of them also had really good relationships with Miley, their little sister. Basil and Alfie were best bros. We knew they would be happy together, even if it meant it was in a new, loving family.

It was truly a painful and horrible experience. My heart absolutely shattered when we said our final goodbyes at their forever home. Never in my life did I think I would need to go through something like this. We helped bring them into this world and watched them grow and develop. It was so very hard to give them a last kiss and cuddle before driving away. Both my sister and I cried hysterically from start to finish, of course.

We actually snuck out of the house in the wee hours of the morning, praying we didn’t run into any police or roadblocks or anything. This was in high-lockdown times. You weren’t allowed to leave your house. Only for very specific reasons. And I promise driving kittens to their new home ain’t on the list. It was eerie. There were 0 other cars or people outside or on the road. Just us, crying, and the kittens meowing, all unsure of what is real and what is not. Wild times, indeed.

Luckily, they were playing and being themselves 5 minutes after we arrived, and we just felt in our hearts it was the right family for them. That made us feel strong enough to be able to say goodbye, however hard it was.

Losing Tommy

I’m going to keep this short. I still struggle to find the words to explain how excruciatingly painful and hard this event was for my sister and me. She and Tommy were especially close… He was the sweetest, most handsome little boy, only 2 years old. He really was a special little gem, and I miss him dearly.

I was on a work call when my sister barged into my room/office saying the most dreaded words: “Come now. Tommy was hit by a car.” We were out in the road, looking for him because he ran off into the bushes. My sister found him, and we brought him home, adrenaline high but feeling relieved that he was alive. My sister carried him in and gently put him down. He stood there, and we almost got happy when he took a step or two, and his back legs just gave in. Something was wrong. My sister took him to the vet. I had to work. I don’t remember what exactly was the matter, but he needed surgery, expensive surgery. I was ready to max out my credit card but the vet informed us that there was no guarantee that the surgery would fix the problem. It was risky.

After careful discussion with the vet, we came to the decision to put him down. We wouldn’t have been able to give him the help he required to live a normal, happy life. I would’ve sold my car to help him if I had one. Money was tight, and we didn’t have another viable option.

I’ve never felt pain like that before. I didn’t even get to say goodbye. The last time I saw him was briefly that morning when I got home from sleeping over at a friend’s house. I was going in through the garage, and he was standing outside the garage, and he looked at me. I stopped the garage door from going down and called him. He didn’t come to me. He loved exploring the neighborhood. A real adventurer. He gave me a slow blink and continued with his rounds for the day. I closed the door and got ready for work. The accident happened later that day.

That moment we shared played over in my head probably a thousand times… If I had been more convincing, picked him up, and brought him inside with me, maybe things would have been different. I don’t know. It’s hard not to feel guilty… But either way, nothing changes what happened. We carry his absence with us every day.

If you’ve made it this far, thank you.

Until next time! Give your cat an extra hug today.

Cheers vir eers!

(Cheers for now!)