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Toby's Diary

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It must be autumn

September 19th 2016 10:31 pm
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Last week it was still summer and we were all toasty and hot. Then the rain came and washed summer away, literally overnight, and now it is autumn.

One real sign of autumn - yesterday Josie climbed onto mum's lap. She hasn't done that since Spring.

Being Josie she chose a really bad time. My mum had supper on the stove. To be fair you could see my mum weighing up whether burned supper was a price worth paying for Josie's comfort (but concluding the subsequent kitchen fire wouldn't make anyone comfortable and Josie had to move).

My best thing about autumn - my mum is back in her big fluffy robe in the mornings. I love to purr and paddy paw on that. I do try with her light summer robe but it isn't nearly so satisfying and my mum goes all "Ow! Your claws," whereas they just sink in her fluffy one and she can't feel them so we're both happy.

I love summer but there are definitely good things about autumn too.


We are helpful cats

September 18th 2016 10:01 pm
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My mum was busy and out and about at the weekend but on Sunday afternoon she did our favourite thing - the three of us all lined up on the sofa, being cosy and happy, mum with her book and us with our dreams. It was all perfectly delightful.

But then she said, "I really have to sort out my pension paperwork."

Well that didn't sound like fun but you know us, always willing to lend a hand, so we forsook our soft and comfy cushions and joined her.

"Really?" she asked. Our thoughtfulness never ceases to surprise her.

Josie spread herself out over the paperwork so mum would have something beautiful to look at and I took the role of advisor, keeping up comments and what she was doing, how badly she was doing it and generally telling her what she ought to be doing.

She wasn't as grateful as you would expect but she did get the forms she wanted to complete done so we could all go back and be happy again.

I bet it would have taken twice as long without our input. (Mum says half as long would be right but she's never been that good at maths.)


The water fountain

September 17th 2016 10:51 pm
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You may be wondering how we are getting on with this.

I will tell you. Josie loves it. Mostly she likes to drink just where the water lands. Sometimes she laps from the spout. Sometimes just the pond bit. She reckons it tastes extra delicious and I should try it.

So I did.

Never again.

A cat should never have water poured on his head while he has a quiet drink! And the other cat should never laugh at the cat who forgot that water flows constantly from the spout and puts his head under it. Whose crazy idea is a cat water fountain anyway!

Looks like we'll be keeping it though. I just won't use it.

"So now you have your water bowl, your fountain, your water glass - how come you're still drinking my water?" asked my mum.

Just in case. Us cats hate to risk missing out on stuff.


So my mum went to the Cat Cafe

September 11th 2016 10:10 pm
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She told us all about it. When they arrived, before they were let anywhere near the cats, they were given a list of rules - Do not wake a sleeping cat; Do not pick up any cat; Do not disturb a sleeping cat and so on.

You can imagine how impressed I was with that and am expecting future guests to our home to be given a similar briefing before they are allowed to see me.

Then my mum showed me the pictures she had taken - the cats have raised walk-ways and a magic tree and high-up hammocks to sleep in and so many toys.

"Where are you going?" asked my mum as I trotted off.

"To fetch a pen. Maybe they'll be hiring new cats and I want to apply." It looked amazing.

"One - you are going nowhere. I love you too much to let you go. Two - you don't much like sharing with Josie. There's about a dozen cats there and they all have to get along. I'm not sure you would. Three - you would be expected to show yourself to visitors. You don't have the best track record on that front."

Oh - another dream crushed.

"Maybe you could get us a magic tree and raised walk way and lots of toys instead?" I suggested.

"You have lots of toys and the magic tree would take up most of the flat so no."

My mum can be very unreasonable at times.



September 8th 2016 9:59 pm
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A package came in the post for me. Not for my mum. Not for Josie and me. Just me. It had my name on it.

I can read my own name. T for terrific. O for orsome. B for brave. Y for Yise. Sums me up!

Anyway if a package is addressed to a particular cat and contains two sachets of Sheba then that particular cat should get to eat that Sheba. Both sachets at a time of his choosing i.e. there and then and not share with a cat who is not named on the package i.e. Josie.

My mum saw things a bit differently. I had to share one sachet with Josie and the other one is saved. Life is so unfair.


In other news Josie caught a tiny frog yesterday but my mum stole it. Also, unfair. You never see mum doing the hard work of hunting but she's quick enough to take anything we catch.


The strangest thing my mum has ever done

September 6th 2016 10:19 pm
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Yes, even stranger than getting us a water fountain.

I heard her talking, all happy, about an outing she is going on, what time they will meet, how much they are looking forward to it etc. Nothing odd there but then I heard where they are going.

Lady Dinah's Cat Emporium.

Imagine my horror. Bad enough I have to share with Josie, we want no more cats in this home. Mum was quick to reassure me. She won't be buying any cats. She will be drinking tea and eating cake and there will be cats there.

"You get to live with cats," I pointed out. She agreed, yes, she does.

"And you drink a lot of tea." She does, gallons of the stuff. I'm surprised we got running water rather than her get running tea.

"And you eat a lot of cake," I added.

"Maybe I permit myself the occasional nibble," my mum said.

"A LOT of cake," I continued, "so the experience of drinking tea and eating cake and being with cats isn't one you have to go anywhere to enjoy."

Mum had no answer to that.

"And yet you'll do it, won't you?"

She will. This will be the strangest thing I think I've ever known her do.


We have a new thing

September 5th 2016 10:24 pm
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I'm not actually sure what it is. I found it first and gave it a wide berth, discretion being the better part of valour.

Then Josie came in and followed my good example.

It's on the floor, pale grey and there is some sort of liquid flowing in it. Most peculiar. Over time we have got closer and Josie said, "I think it's water" and bravely tasted some. "Yes, definitely water."

We have no idea why we have a small grey water fountain in our home.

Oh - my mum says Nahid gave it to us. Mum had said about Josie drinking from taps (I know - that tortie is weird!) and Nahid wondered if Josie would like her own fountain and mum thought she might and now we have one.

It's been a week now and apart from that one sample Josie's not been back.

It may be we don't actually need a fountain. We have our bowls and mum's water glass and our own water glass and the taps so we are probably OK for water. But I do like the way that our mum keeps trying to please us!


I have amazing powers

August 29th 2016 10:17 pm
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My mum went away at the weekend and she stole some of our toys to take with her.

"Just the ones you never play with. My friend has kittens and I think they would like them."

Now this is a friend who came to visit me back in July.

"I am using my amazing super powers and I reckon at least one of the kittens is a black one," I said. "I'm right, aren't I?"

I had impressed my mum. I could tell.

"One black, one tabby. How did you guess that?"

I didn't guess that. I knew. I have seen this before. People come to visit me and they see how awesome I am and they go home and realise that a black cat is just what they need in their lives. Obviously they want me but I'm still very busy training my mum so won't go and they have to make do with another black cat instead.

Black cats, not torties. I rest my case on who is the superior of me or Josie.


Dare we hope?

August 21st 2016 10:23 pm
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Last we heard Lady Catster was having a big think about everything and was not to be disturbed. We're been purring that she decides that our blogs can keep going but we haven't heard anything.

Not much news here. Josie went to the vet. She and I had upset tummies and I got better really fast but she didn't. She reckons she did but mum says the tray tells a rather different story so off they went.

Josie said there were two very bad moments. Having prodded and poked her and put the thermometer you know where - finally the vet released Josie. Josie jumped down off the bench to where she had seen mum put the basket but the basket had vanished. She looked all round and panicked, convinced that meant she would have to stay there for ever. But my mum had picked up the basket as Josie was jumping down.

The second moment was as my mum was paying. A woman walked in with a basket and greeted the receptionist saying, "I'm from Cats Protection League". My mum looked in the basket and said, "What an adorable kitten." Josie was afraid we might end up with another. But mum looked at the vet bill and said she can't afford another. Narrow escape!!

Josie now has medicine in her food. I think she's getting better; hard to tell with that one.


So this is goodbye

August 8th 2016 10:10 pm
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By the time my mum came back from work Josie felt well enough to come and greet her. That made my mum happy.

She fed us and Josie had a few chunks. Not me though.

"This is not soup." I got soup when I was poorly and I had been looking forward to sharing Josie's when she got hers. I was disappointed to find normal food.

Mum said she had looked for soup but they don't stock it where she works. She works in a bit of a rougher borough than where we live. (Mum wants it pointed out that she works in the only borough in the UK with its own cat protection officer. "Is that your job?" I wanted to know but she said that if she saw sad, abandoned cats all day she would bring them home so I'm glad it isn't.)

"So this is goodbye then," said my mum.

"But Josie seems so much better. I think she's going to be just fine," I said.

"Tomorrow all the Catster Blogs will be gone. All that love, all those memories, all those funny stories, all that shared heartache. Gone." My mum was sad.

But she's wrong - because love and happy and funny and sad never go. The words and pictures will go but they're on the puters. The cats and their peoples (and even the dogs some of my friends live with) they all go on, having stories and loving each other.

My mum is talking to some of the other mums on e-mail so hopefully we'll all find a new home for our blogs but until then Josie and I send purrs and thank yous to everyone.

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