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The Sadness of Leaving Your Cat For Christmas

By Wesley Nelson
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Raphael in the cage in cattery

Welcome to the Wednesday Cats of Catster! Every week, we share a story from one of our cat-loving Catsters. This week is about Wes and his fiercely cuddly Russian Blue, Raphael.

For many, the festive period is a time for joy, for family, and for togetherness.

For me and Steph, though, it’s often bittersweet, and that togetherness with our family means we have to take Raphy to the cattery.

Her side of the family lives overseas. This means that not only do airlines not allow him in the cabin, but even if they did, we aren’t quite sure how he’d handle the travel. On my side of the family, a member of the family has medical conditions that can be fatal if exposed to pets for too long. When he last came to visit my home, he could only stand in the doorway for a few minutes before his chest started feeling uncomfortable.

When we initially discussed getting a cat, a key discussion for Steph and me was about understanding that it is a privilege and an obligation to look after an animal, not simply a right. For that reason, we now try to limit instances where we have to bring Raphy to a cattery. However, at certain times, it is inevitable. Here’s what we do, though, to make sure it is as comfortable for him as it can possibly be:

The 4 Things We Do to Make It Easier:

1. Only the best

We interviewed a number of catteries before settling on one we liked. To us, it was one of the most important decisions we could make for his safety and happiness. We looked at images online, read reviews, and then grilled them on any concerns we had. We considered not only what they said, but how they said it. For example, did they get back to us within a reasonable period of time? It’s surprising how many don’t! In the end, we found a fantastic cattery… about three hours away. To us, it’s a small price to pay to ensure he has fresh air, things to do, and nice people looking after him.

Raphael in a pet carrier

2. Consistency

When we were going through the process, we spoke to some vets who told us that there was nothing innately distressing about a cat moving from one place to another. However, for optimal happiness, it’s better for Raphy if he is familiar with each environment. That’s why we wanted to make the decision about a cattery once, and only once.


3. Communication

We stay in regular contact with our cattery, day or night. It doesn’t matter how small the issue is; they know they can contact us. Similarly, without annoying them or driving them wild, we ask for a photo/video every now and then, and a little description of how our little monster is doing.

Raphael in the cattery
These are some of the photos our cattery has sent.

4. Practice

Traveling there and back to the cattery was something that we built up with Raphy over time. We practiced taking him in the car for short periods of time (he was very interested in the world), and we practiced taking him on the train (he was more interested in napping). We made sure that there were lots of cuddles and treats throughout the journey so that he had a positive experience. We did this starting when he was extremely young, as we thought that as he aged, it would be tougher and tougher for him to accept travel without having tried it before. Now, though, whether it’s a car or a train, he’s as cool as can be the whole way there (and the whole way back).

Now, I have to be honest, we still worry. Every time we leave him, it is the worst feeling in the world, and we talk about him every day while he’s away. How he’s doing, what time he’ll be eating, and which of his toys he’s playing with. And of course, these discussions are accompanied by us flicking through the photographs on our phones of him in various states of mischief.

close up of Raphael

What do you think? Do you agree that sometimes there is no option but to leave a cat safely at home? Is it something that you have to do semi-regularly throughout the year, even though you feel bad about it? Is there anything you think we should be adding to our list as considerations for the future? Let me know because I’m always looking to make the experience kinder for Raphy and less emotional for us!

This article features Wes and Raphael in our Wednesday Cats of Catster series.

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Wesley Nelson
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Wesley Nelson

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