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Won-Ton Reflects

I Am Tricked By My Mom And Dad

February 8th 2010 12:44 pm
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I have reason to believe my mom and dad have been tricking me by sneaking me pills hidden inside tasty chickeny chewy treats.

For a while they have been giving me a few tasty little treats twice a day. I always thought it was somewhat odd that one of the treats was chewy with a crunchy center that tasted a little funny. None of my other chewy treats had crunchy centers that tasted funny, but I didn't think much of it because the treat was so chickeny and chewy and fun to eat. But one time I bit down right into the crunchy center, and it tasted really bitter, so I spit it out. Even so, it left a funny taste in my mouth; fortunately the other treats covered up that funny taste.

So the next time I was offered the chewy chickeny treat I sniffed it very carefully first. And I did detect something non-chickeny about it. I took an experimental bite and felt that crunchy center inside it. So I spit the whole thing out, tasty chickeny chewy part and all. I remembered how awful and bitter that crunchy center tasted. And because of that I have reason to suspect that crunchy center was actually a pill.

Usually when I need medicine, my dad pries my jaws open and pops a pill (or squirts a liquid) down my hatch. This is something I grow tired of rather rapidly, as you may well imagine. I've even nipped my dad once -- by accident of course; or even twice, maybe. Or three times. By accident, of course. Well, maybe 4 or 5 times. Accidentally! Of course. Or maybe more times . . . OK, a lot more times -- purely accidentally! Ahem. So, anyway, he stopped trying to pry my jaws open.

But then I began getting those chewy chickeny treats shortly afterwards, with the funny crunchy centers, and I thought they were really great and life was fabulous. No more pried-open jaws, no more icky medicines, just tasty little chickeny chewy treats . . . until I bit right into that funny crunchy center. That's when I put two and two together and began to wise up about what was really going on. My mom and dad were pulling a fast one, exploiting my love of chickeny chewy treats to trick me into taking pills.

This is not good! How can I ever trust another chickeny chewy treat ever again? This is enough to put me off all treats completely, for fear they are a superficially innocent means of administering vile medicines. I am afraid I must remain ever suspicious from now on, lest I be fooled into actually swallowing a pill. Yuck!

Well, at least my daily pumpkin is still unadulterated . . . so far . . .


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