August 11th 2013 5:24 am
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So this morning I was up to my usual tricks, and slipped out the door into the entryway when the Papa went out to get something. See, we live in this old farmhouse that’s got this hallway kind of like an airlock on a spaceship. When you step out of the kitchen door, you have the choice of either going out the front door or up the stairs to the second floor door or under the stairs to the basement door. Lately the pawrents, after the initial curse or two, have been letting me stay out there until they have reason to go out again. It can get a little boring since there’s not that much to explore under the stairway now, not much I could hurt myself on, and I’ve seen it all before anyway. Usually, by the time they let me back in, I’m waiting at the kitchen door. This time when the Mama opened the door, she said: “Oh, it’s you. I’d forgotten you existed.”
…….????!!!!!.......I gotta admit, this sent me into a blue funk for awhile. I started thinking - What If I’d Never Been Born?
[This is where you got to imagine those wavy, blurry images like they show when someone is dreaming or remembering stuff that happened earlier]
Picture this: Sleeper is a little tiny baby; Big Mama (our cat mother), has left her under the kitchen window and never come back, don’t know why. It wasn’t because she had made a choice and carried me off instead; I’d never been born, remember?
So, the Mama takes the Sleep in and bottle-feeds her for a month, and everyone is just hunky-dorey, except maybe the Sleep feels a little lonesome every once and a while for someone like herself to play with. Then Fearless shows up with all the other Ferals, and the Mama feeds them all, but Fearless is the only one who asks to come inside, so the pawrents let her in. And then Sleeper and Fearless are really happy to have each other to play with; and Fearless isn’t ever jealous of Sleeper’s sister, because the Sleep doesn’t HAVE a sister, so Fearless doesn’t act mean and chase her friend ever. And then they get a little baby brother Owl who loves to play with his big sister Fearless since Sleeper is older now and doesn’t want to play as much. And they’re all happy together and never fight, and …………………….. Wait a minute…HOLD THE PHONE! This is supposed to show how much poorer everyone’s life would be if I’d never existed!
Well, it was a dumb idea anyway.
Darling, my life would be very different without you, after all your the first and only girl wingman I've got.
Thinking of life not as we know it is always an intriguing subject, thanks.
Darn that Jimmy Stewart for outdoing your non-existing plan anyway!!! Who needs him? You just need to find your own Clarence to bring it all into perspective. Who knows, without you, maybe your mom could've turned into a.....dog person. It's a horrifying thought.
The best-laid plans...
Zach, my good buddy - honored as always to be your girl wingperson.
Percy - you'll never believe this, but the pawrents WERE dog-persons before all of us. But we have done our very best to reform them. :)
Monster - where did I go wrong? (sigh)
I think you need Clarence to show you how bad it would be without you.
Jezzie - I've decided to forget the whole thing! Never good to second guess my decisions. The Mama was obviously just having a senior moment - hehehe...