February 27th 2011 11:10 am
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For the past few days Mama has had a sad stuck in her throat, eating all her words. She hasn't been able to help me write a diary and translate it from Meow to English. But we both feel that it's time to try.
On Thursday I had a sleepy day, and Mama gave me some ham, and some trouts, to nibble on. She also sat down on the floor near my hut and scritched my head for awhile, but I really wanted to sleep. Late in the afternoon I got a little more energetic and walked around the house a bit. Dougal decided he liked my fire, and stretched out right in front of it, but Mama nudged him so I would have some room too.
At night I was dozing in my hut when I heard Mama and Daddy talking to a lady with a soft voice. The lady came to peek in my hut, and then they talked some more. Then she gently reached into my hut, and looked at my eyes and felt my neck, and said that Mama was right - the swellings on my neck were lymph nodes, and they weren't really swollen but they were being pressed outward by my tumor.
Mama took Cow!Cat to her bedroom so he wouldn't get upset, as his job is to protect me and there was no way for the humans to assure him that I would be getting the best protection there is. Then Daddy took Lady to the big bathroom, because her job is to help in every task, but the soft-voiced lady didn't really need a helper, no matter how well-intentioned.
Mama sat down with me in my hut on her lap, and said that my being sick was almost over, and soon I wouldn't need any more needles or pills or anything else annoying. Then the soft-voice lady pinched my leg with a needle. It stung a little, even though I had taken my pain meds earlier, and I twitched, but then I was quiet. Mama scritched my ears, and I relaxed, and finally I did a face plant and was sound asleep. Mama took me out of the hut then, and wrapped me in a fluffy towel to keep me warm, and cuddled me and kissed me and rocked me, and I snored a little. She told me I was going to not need my pretty little sick cat suit any more, I was going to a place where I would be pure energy, not tied down by a bad tumor, or a weak heart, or broken kidneys. Then the lady gave me a second stick, this time into my liver, because she said my veins were so small and thin it would be gentler to inject into an organ. And Mama kept snuggling me, and I felt her leaking on me.
I stuck around for awhile, and I heard the soft-voiced lady say I was a tough little girl, and I felt Mama smile when she answered that being a tough little girl was what kept me alive through everything. Silly Mama. PURRS kept me alive! Purrs, and love, and Mama's touch, and the skill and dedication of my wonderpurr docfurs and nurses.
But eventually I let go, because I saw Thomas waving to me at the foot of a shining Bridge. I was so glad to see him again - he always was so gentle with me. I'm afraid I gave Mama a little bit of a bath then, as I slipped off my heavy earth-cat suit and went to join Thomas. And there was Calvin, right next to him, making sure I had my heart basket.
Once they greeted me, and Thomas licked my new-angel ears, I looked around some more and saw so many beautiful, shimmery, strong angels coming to meet me. I knew the Bridge had to be a busy place, but still it's a bit overwhelming to a newcomer! Tyler and Spunky were waiting to tell me their eye stories. Then Mr. Sam and Misha introduced themselves and said that when things calm down a little, they want to show me the meadow where we can hang out in the sunshine and breezes and chase bugs. My dear friend Lola wanted to give me flying lessons - which is funny because I hadn't been measured for my wings yet! And Freckles and Emily Felicity and Alaidh and Princess Penny and Jazzi and Miss Mittens and Sugar and Little Cat and Samantha And Alex were waving to me, along with Reuben and Simon and Glowy Bear and so very many more angels. Then I noticed Catsy and Taag and Lucinda and Tutti all sitting in the shelter of a big tree, peeking out at me shyly, so I went over to say hello and give them whisker kisses. There are even some tiny little kitten angels, rolling around and playing in the grass, chasing their tails and each other. I am so glad they are having a proper kittenhood here in eternity, since their enjoyment on earth was cut so short.
There are so many things for a new angel to do, and what's truly wonderful is that angels never get tired! If we are resting, it's simply because it feels good. But I have been taking it easy the past few days. I have eternity, after all, so there's no rush to do everything at once, and I have a lot to learn. For now I've simply been sitting on the soft grass, nibbling it occasionally, and looking through my heart basket, treasuring all the love I find there - much of it from kitties and humans I didn't even know of while I was living on earth.
I also found my little vial of sparkly angel stardust tucked in the basket. Thomas tells me that the more you use the magic dust, the bigger the vial gets - and the dust never runs out! That's a good thing, because I have so many earth furriends who can benefit from a healing sprinkle.
I'll get better at using the dust once I learn to fly, but I know some of it already has landed on Mama, because she's been sleeping a lot after weeks of only getting naps, and each time she wakes up her mind is a little clearer. She gave me a heart-shaped crystal in my last days on earth, to keep in my hut and look at and touch with my paw, or to sleep on top of when I wanted. She put it aside for me after I came to the Bridge, but yesterday I let her know that she can carry it with her. It connects her aching heart to my angelic energy-heart, and it lets me know when she needs a little extra healing. Healing my healer a little seems to me like a very good new-angel job.
Angelic whisker kisses,
Awe sweet girl - you have many friends in Heaven. Please kiss my Sister Autumn. I miss her so much
kisses and hugs
Godspeed sweet angel...you shared so much love and were loved so much..you will always be loved as you are a part of your mom and your furamily...
hugs and purrs till time we meet again..
Ras and the Carolina Crew
Oh Sweet Taffy...I love you so...please be my new Angel Friend....
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