Gotcha Day

May 2, 1998. That was such a long time ago. And now I’m not with Mommy anymore, but she says she wouldn’t have traded our time together for anything in the world. Samsara told you part of our gotcha day story, so I’m not going to repeat it. But you know what? Mommy says in so many ways I’m still around.

You know that picture that Mommy took of us in the baffroom mirror: the one where I was trying to help her take the picture? She just saved another version of it—this one is in the style of a pencil sketch. The pencil sketch style gets rid of that awful yellow light and Mommy thinks she’s going to use that picture as the logo for her furtography business venture. After all, she says Colette and I taught her effurything she now knows about furtography. (She says that Samsara’s face, with those big eyes, usually loves the camera—she’s too easy.)

That’s right, some of the furs around here have purrsuaded Mom that she might be able to make a living doing this purrfessionally, so Mom is trying to put together a purrt- and doggy-folio, and do the million and one things she needs to do to make this happen.

Giggles! Instead of seeing pictures of herself and Colette right now, when she sits in Mommy’s lap, Samsara is seeing pictures of doggies. (Some of them are really pretty, some are really funny-looking and then there are the others, the big doggies that are just plain scary.) I wonder if Samsara would have tried to smacky-paw Argos, the French Bull Mastiff! And if she did, would he have paid any ‘ttention?

Thank you all so much for stopping by my page. It’s going to take Mommy a bit of time before we can thank effurybody. We miss you all and, as soon as we can, we’ll come back to play.

Purrs and huggies…

Bridge Day Thanks.

It was a rough few days there. And, to top it off, I’ve been busy. (Maybe I shouldn’t say that—Diary Gal, you’re going to be back saying ‘Gotcha. Let’s give Marrakech another DDP’!)

I needn’t mention Saturday was St. Patty’s Day. Last year I was reeling. I had just helped Keshy to the Bridge and even though my voice coach has kitties (and has lost kitties) of his own, he still didn’t quite understand why I couldn’t come to his party. I brushed sadness aside this year and only walked in the door after 4:00 Sunday morning. (There’s nothing quite like the New York City subway. It can turn an hour’s ride into a two-and-a-half-hour late-night ordeal.)

Saturday was also the day Samsara was scheduled for her echocardiogram and sonogram, and the day that Dr. L. (Colette’s oncologist) had another gig.

I spent Sunday recovering.

Colette was due for another CBC on Tuesday. Let’s see… it’s (name a day of the week), it must be (name a kitty[‘s]) Mommy, Carol, showing up for a vet visit.

Rather than spill beans here, I’ll have Colette and Samsara tell you about their visits.

I will add one thing, though. The sonographer who did Samsara’s tests brought her back and commented on how sweet she is (and that it really showed how well-cared for she is [yay!]}. After thanking her and without even thinking about it, I had two remarks: “Yes, Samsara is good girl”, and, that her late half-sister, Marrakech, was “breath-taking” she was so sweet.

Thank you everybody for stopping by: for your gifts, for your kind wishes and for your love. I’m sure Keshy would have had a huggie for each of you.

Tabbies O Trout Town – Angel Star
Pinkie, Biggles and Nonny – Angel Star
Tink and Snow – Heart of Gold
Ringo, Webster and Dusty Puppycat – Rainbow Star with the Teddy Bear.
Anonymous – Heart of Gold
Bella, Orange Ruffy, Smokey Boo and Natalie the Natcat – Four Leaf Clover
Louis LeBeau – Rainbow
Family of Skylar, Mrs. Murphy and Rusty – Rainbow
Nala Sue – Rose
Family of Big Harry, Patches, Angel Abigail and Zack – Heart
Family of Kitty P, Harrison and Indy – Heart
Family of Misha, Molly and Macy – Rainbow
Blue II and Family – Rainbow
Family of Lola, Beepers and Ashlynne – Heart
Teebo, Callie and Rose – Rainbow
Simon and Rubin – Heart with the Teddy Bear Hugs
Family of Mia, Milo, Xena Princess Warrior and Queen Tallulah – Rainbow
Serena Honey Girl Angel – Rainbow
Family of Bliss, Penelope and Minuette – Rainbow
Sofie and Family - Rainbow

Hugs…

Mom, Carol

First Year Bridge Day Anniversary: the Memories

Twelve years of memories that will most probably dim but never will fade. It’s your first year Bridge Day anniversary, Keshy. How vivid and alive you’ve been all week, in my mind and in my heart! The tears come easily today; the words for this diary entry don’t flow as well.

Gosh, those cherry yuckies (prednisolone) you had to take, and the way you would shake your hind leg after the inhaler treatments, as if you had just used the litter box and gotten the sand (and other things) stuck between your toes. Those chases around the house: you trying to avoid those medicines with all the spirit you had in you. I still love to tell the story about the Houdini act you pulled on me with the kennel cab. Me trying to get you out of the empty box—you had just walked out under my armpit while my head was on top of it. Then you sat there, behind me, watching me make a fool of myself.

I still feel our nuzzles. It was the cutest thing when we would go nose to nose and you would sneeze on me. I can almost smell you and feel the softness of your fur against my nose. I loved nibbling on your ears and I loved the way you went off to sleep in my lap when I stroked your paw pads. I thought it was the funniest thing when you shook your head. Your ears made the same sound as a doggy’s ears.

You always ‘noticed’ when I got my hair cut—we would both lay down to sleep, you on my pillow—then you would start nuzzling my hair—and chewing on it because you liked the scent of the products the hair cutter used.

A mourning dove came to our window early this afternoon. Woo hoo, woo hoo…. I think he came just about the time you were last in my arms. You used to love watching the doves.

“What’ll I Do? What’ll I do with just a photograph to tell my troubles to? When I’m alone with only dreams of you, that won’t come true, what’ll I do?” (Irving Berlin)

I’ll be posting a few photos I still have. The quality of some of them is better than others. Mostly they are ‘outtakes’—ones an editor would have left on the cutting room floor. I meant months ago to post my most common view of Keshy--this photo taken with her in my lap: her tiny head with those enormous ears sticking out of it. I’ve mentioned this to Toki’s Mom (because Toki has them too) and to several other people—they were the most expressive kitty ears I’ve ever seen. They stuck out from her head at almost 180 degrees when she was happily leading me to the bedroom for extra noms, they were at 90 degree angles when she was on a mission, and at 45 degrees when she was startled. She crinkled them when she wasn’t happy and I never once saw her lay them flat against her head—she just didn’t have it in her.

I noticed all your lovely gifts on Keshy’s page. Thank you—I haven’t had a chance to look at them yet. I’ve been struggling with this diary entry and my sadness all day long today. I’ll be coming back to thank everyone ‘purrsonally’ over the weekend.

I also want to give Hazel Lucy’s Mom a big hug. We both lost our babies a year ago today. I know she must be hurting too.

Mom Carol

Oh Nosey! Another DDP!

Mommy is starting to say that Diary Gal is out to torture her. It’s so close to my first year Bridge Day. Mommy is missing me so much. What does love look like? Mommy says it looks like me. I was always trying to figure out newer and better ways to get picked up and cuddled and loved. Sometimes they worked, sometimes they didn’t.

Sometimes it seemed Mommy took me for granted—that I would always be there. And now I’m not. Maybe I overdid it a little bit. You can’t always stick to Mommy like glue. But weren’t we a part of each other? What Mommy wouldn’t give to be able to pick me up again and love me.

It’s not that Mommy doesn’t love Samsara and Colette; she does. But, for years, Mommy would always tell Auntie Joany, her sister, that there would be major trouble when I went to the Bridge. She says I was the ‘special’ one.

A year down the road, Mommy says it almost seems like I never left. She remembers little things as clearly as if they happened today or yesterday.

We won’t go into details right now—we’ll save those memories for my Bridge Day.

In the meantime, thank you Diary Gal for the honor—even if it does make Mommy sad.

And thank you
Smokey Joe, Milo, Mallee, Sam, Timmy and Zig for the beautiful Emerald
Pennie, Minnie and Bliss for the lovely Heart of Gold
Tate McPhatpants for the Leprechauns Hat. I can play with that, right? I don’t have to wear it?
Skylar and Family for the Leprechauns Hat
Elsa for the pretty Four Leaf Clover. You’re right, Mommy does love my pictures.

Thank you, Buddie and Furmily for your p-mail, and thank you effurybody for stopping by my page.

Mommy has to help Misha with his diary entry tomorrow morning. It’s his birthday tomorrow!

Huggies…

DDP on March 8th—Hoo Boy!

Mommy is having a hard time catching up. She says she wants to know why I get the honor (or Colette gets it, or Samsara gets it) effury time we even breathe that Mommy is going to be busy.

I love it when I get the DDP, but since I can’t do my own typing anymore, Mommy says it starts making a ruff schedule even ruffer. (Am I beginning to sound like a doggy? Hmmm….)

Mommy took Samsara to see V-lady on my DDP day (last Thursday). Samsara started to give Mommy a hard time with what she wants to eat and she lost a whole pound since she last saw V-lady in October. First she didn’t want to eat the kibble and now she’s starting to not want her prescription canned food too. V-lady found what she thinks might be a heart murmur, so she wants Samsara back for an echo-cardiogram this coming Saturday. The only good news V-lady had for Samsara is that her kidney function values haven’t deteriorated.

Mommy was with Auntie Rochelle until late on Saturday. Auntie Rochelle is almost ready to move now. Hopefurly the move can happen on Thursday. Mommy can’t be there ‘cause of class, but, if the move doesn’t happen then, Auntie Rochelle might get into trouble.

It’s less than a week before my one-year Bridge Day anniversary. Mommy feels it’s still so unreal that I’m not with her anymore. She’s had a hard time helping me with my diaries ‘cause effury time she goes to my page she gets lost in the pictures of me.

The other day she noticed that Samsara’s appointment with V-lady last Thursday (March 8) was exactly the same date as my last appointment: the one Samsara and I both had a year ago.. If you look my photo book, March 8 was the day Samsara and I went to see vet lady together. That’s the day I came home in my pretty orange doggy sweater. Mommy couldn’t believe the coincidence. It was the last time I saw V-lady. I had a pimple on my ear and Samsara had a cold. Then I caught effurbody’s cold and Mommy needed to take me to the ‘mergency instead. It made Mommy furry sad when she saw that picture.

Thank you effurbody for the lovely purresents you gave me:

Trooper, Dakota and Smokey for the pretty Rainbow Star.
Pipo and Minko for the pretty kitty picture. Wow, She looks like me, ‘cept she’s a seal-point and I was a chocolate-point!
Tate McPhatpants for the Four-leaf Clover. We hope it brings us lots of luck. That’s a good thing to have right now.
Patches and Phantom for the Shrimpie. Yummy!
Biggles for the Heart. Awww!
Bell and Family for the Heart
Elsa for the Heart. Giggles. We just read your message after writing my diary entry!

Thank you, Buddie and Family, for your p-mail.

And, thanks, effurybody for stopping by my page.

Purrs & huggies…

DDP Thank You

Wow! How many days have already passed since my DDP. Mommy hasn’t really had a chance till now to help me with my diary.

The week has hardly begun and already she says she’s had a rough week. She spent Friday and Saturday helping Auntie Rochelle with her move, and that’s not done yet. On Sunday, Mommy got sick with a migraine. She doesn’t know if she got it because of the stress from helping Auntie Rochelle, or ‘cause she put some Fra’Angelico liqueur instead of brandy in her tea. She thought she was getting sick and she didn’t have any brandy in the house.

On Monday, she had the last minute stuff for a luncheon she was helping arrange. Then she had to run out for her lesson and a class. Yesterday she needed to go to the luncheon and, OMC, how many things went wrong! (She’s thanking her lucky stars none of it was because of something she did.) She said it was the stuff that comedy television is made from. The web site sent people to the wrong place. A couple of the older people were threatening not to come because of the PayPal system the treasurer just set up. The projector they borrowed didn’t work and then one guy who seems not to have talked to anybody at the wrong place wants his money back ‘cause he couldn’t find the luncheon? Effurybody else found the luncheon. Hoo boy! You should have seen the e-mails flying afterwards!

Mommy says that hopefurrly today she’ll have time to practice for another class she has tomorrow afternoon, ‘cause she’s taking Samsara to see the vet lady tomorrow morning. And, Friday, Mommy expects to be back with Auntie Rochelle.

Anyway—I’m here now and I want to say thank you to effurybody for stopping by my page to ‘gratulate me for my DDP.

Angel Samantha – for the Leprechaun hat. Mommy always used to call me a spry little elf. That hat will make it ‘fficial.
Simon and Reuben for the pink ribbon. I love pink!
Family of Skylar, Mrs. Murphy and Rusty for the shamrock. Aren’t the green flowers pretty!
Family of Bliss, Penelope and Minuette for the pretty shamrock. I sure did enjoy my DDP at the bridge. (I never thought that kind of thing was possible.)
Timothy McKatz (giggles; your name looks so funny!) for the pretty pink ribbon.

And for your p-mails:
Gibbs, Cash, and Angels Buddie, McKenna, Mookie, Angel and Ricki
Pipo and Minko with the pretty portrait you framed of me with all the nice dogwood flowers and jewelry.

And thank you, effurybody who stopped by my page to help me celebrate!


Huggies…

Oh Nosey!

We almost missed my DDP today and it’s really late so we can’t even look at your pretty gifts.

I feel furry honored! Smokey Joe said it was really fun dancing with me at the Bridge, and Pipo and Minko made me a pretty picture, and Kitcat came around to congratulate me.

Mommy says she’s not going to be around much tomorrow either. She’s helping Auntie Rochelle move from one ‘partment to another.

Mommy is feeling sleepy now, so she’s going to have to help me say thank you for your gifts tomorrow.

Nighty night for now.


Purrs and huggies.

Thank You!

Thank you effurybody for stopping by to make my first birfday at the Bridge a happy one. Mommy woke up in a migraine funk today and it took us almost all day to look at all your purresents.

Gee, I don’t know what to say. Mommy and I feel so loved. Thank you all for caring so much about us. Even though I couldn’t be with Mommy, your lovely gifts and P-mails really cheered us up.

Thank you:

Mercy for the Heart of Gold Star
Hunter, Munky and Ozzie for the beautiful Birfday Cake to share with the other angels at the bridge
Milo, Smokey Joe, Mallee, Sam, Timmy and Ziggy for the Birfday Hat. (Smokey Joe, will you dance with me?)
Tate for the Cuppy Cake
Serena for the Valentine’s Day Heart
Skylar, Mrs. Murphy and family for the pretty Rainbow
Anonymous for the Shrimpie. Do you know I was the only kitty in the house that could tolerate fishies?
Big Harry, Angel Abigail, Patches and Zack for the Heart
Ruby Fur Angel and Furmily for the Heart
Kaci Sunshine, Miss Mittens and Family for the pretty Fleur de Lis
Keisha, Sylvester and Merlin for the Heart
Teebo, Callie and Rose for the Heart
Lola ~ Our Good Girl and Family for the Heart
Pinkie, Biggles, Nonny, Buddy and Fluffy for the Fleur de Lis
Simon and Reuben for the Heart
Mietzi Katze and Timo Katze for the Heart
Bliss, Penelope and Minuette for the Fleur de Lis (Mommy thinks that purple and fleur de lis’ are pretty too.)
Angel Alex for the Fleur de Lis
Lady, Baby, Sammie and Cesar for the pretty Pink Ribbon
Skids Kitty for the pretty Rainbow
Samantha Angel for the Heart – that catnip cake sounds yummy!
Sky for the Heart – Huggies and kitty kisses to you too!
Family of Sleeper, Samhain, and Fearless for the Heart
Monster for the Heart
Kitty Pryde, Harrison, Angel Indy and their Mommy for the Heart

And thank you for the Birthday P-Mails:
Jezebel
Patches and Phantom
Tabbies o Trout Towne
Queen Tallulah and Family
Xena Princess Warrior
Pipo and Minko
Angel Alex
Lacey (for Samsara)
Adam Dylan and Family
Eve Layla and Family (for Samsara)

Purrs and Huggies…

First Birthday at the Bridge

It’s my first birthday at the Bridge; I would have turned 14 years old today.

Mommy has been waiting a few days to hear my voice in order to help me write this diary entry, but until now it hasn’t come. And you know what else? I’m not going to tell you how it is at the Bridge.

Instead, I’m going to talk about how it’s been for Mommy. It’s still so hard for Mommy to believe I’m gone. I suppose when you have a bond like we had it’s almost like I really haven’t been gone. Mommy still thinks about me every day. She still remembers me to people—the things I loved and the things I hated. For instance, Mommy just sent Auntie Regina, (who painted my portrait) the Valentines pictures she took of me. (I hated taking those but Mommy cherishes having them.) Sometimes at night Mommy feels a light weight jump on her pillow and it feels like the pillow is pressed down next to her face. Then she reaches up and there’s no kitty there. Am I visiting? I’m not telling.

Mommy spent time, today, with the picture of me in the mirror and with my portrait, telling me how much she loves me and how much she misses her precious little girl (me). She spent time with the boxes that hold my ashes and Misha’s ashes. She looked at my clay paw print and caressed the fur she kept from my brushies. When she smelled the fur she realized it doesn’t smell like me anymore—it’s taken on the smell of the little burlap bag it’s in. Well, my smell may have gone away, but the memories haven’t. Mommy spent time reflecting on the lovely things we did in the 12 years we spent together.

Mommy says we’re going to have to thank effurybody for the beautiful gifts tomorrow since it’s really late. Wow…I’m going to have a lot of fun opening the purresents.

Meeeiuw!

Six Months

My precious little darling, Marrakech, today marks six months since you left me. Where did the time go? And why does it still hurt so much?

It’s so hard to believe you’re gone. Every now and so often I see a little white cat out of the corner of my eye and I turn around to greet you and you’re not there.

I’m trying to be brave and smile when I remember the things we did together: how you helped me take the photos of the two of us; the Houdini act you pulled on me, disappearing when you didn’t want to take your cherry yuckies; how your world was complete when you were in my arms; how my world was complete when you were in my arms; how you used to pat me on the nose every night just before we both went to sleep.

They say that comfort centers around food—it still feels so strange that there’s no one to share my pasta al pesto or my rice salad with. (I’m still amazed. The salad has so many ingredients. How did you always know when it was ready? Mieeeeuw! Give me some!) It feels even stranger buying “Drumstrick” flavor ice-cream with peanuts and fudge in it.

What to say? I miss you so much, Baby Doll. The day you went to the Bridge heaven reclaimed an angel.

I love you.
Mommy