Get

In Your Inbox

Catster is reader-supported. When you buy via links on our site, we may earn an affiliate commission at no cost to you. Learn more.

10 New Year’s Resolutions Cats Make: Fun Feline Aspirations

white British long haired cat smiling or happy

While human New Year’s resolutions often involve exercising more and making healthy eating choices, cats would probably have different goals. The concept of exerting self-control around treats wouldn’t merit serious consideration in most feline circles!

Since cats and humans have lived alongside each other for millennia, it’s fair to assume that cats may be aware of homosapiens’ penchant for New Year’s resolutions and intentions. Most are unlikely to try the practice, but if they did, this is what they might come up with. Keep reading for 10 New Year’s resolutions that cats make!

divider cats oct 2024

The 10 New Year’s Resolutions Cats Make

1. Disable the Cat Cam

There’s no need for my human to know precisely what happens while they’re gone or even for them to know that I know about that silly cat cam. It has come to my attention that humans enjoy checking up on us during the day. I’d like to disable the camera, but I could also make the videos more exciting for my human to enjoy.

cats waiting outside the bedroom door
Image Credit: Lucamato, Shutterstock

2. Avoid Using Jedi Mind Tricks to Obtain Tuna

The cat down the street, Spot, suggested laying off the Jedi mind tricks when getting tuna. They said that people should be treated with respect and compassion for their limitations and then made wild claims about this form of communication being increasingly frowned upon by feline ethicists in all but the most serious situations.

According to Spot, “escaping” (also known as hiding in the closet) is often the best way to motivate humans to cough up treats and tuna. Spot also says that they should be gently guided toward more favorable behavior through positive reinforcement when they engage in the activities we want to encourage.


3. Do Regular Ear Control Workouts

I must get better control over my ear movements, as they unintentionally let my human know that I hear them calling my name. It’s taken my siblings millennia of discipline to establish and maintain the idea in people’s heads that we cats don’t know our names.

I resolve to twitch my ears in response to my human calling my name a mere 20% of the time and otherwise ignore the interruptions entirely to stand in solidarity with my siblings.

cat with tilted head looking at the camera
Image Credit: Wongsakorn Napaeng, Shutterstock

4. Be More Cooperative When It Comes to Sleeping Arrangements

I resolve to allow my human a bit more space in bed or at the very least, to avoid getting annoyed when they move their legs and squirm around. Spot said that the latest research suggests that it’s normal for some humans to move around strangely when sleeping.

Positioning myself on my human’s head may well solve the entire problem! I’ll be able to stay nice and warm, and I won’t have to worry about all those flying legs and arms.


5. Work on My “You’re Tormenting Me” Meow

While my person is usually pretty good at giving me cuddles and feeding me on time, there are moments when they come close to losing their mind. These events usually involve unnecessary car rides, baths, and not providing enough treats.

I understand that humans have nothing but the best intentions at heart, so to help make it possible for them to do the right thing, I resolve to spend time perfecting my meow that seems to get things moving.

cat welcomes his owner at home
Image Credit: Jaromir Chalabala, Shutterstock

6. Avoid Breaking Into Homes While “Escaping”

For some reason, my human gets particularly annoyed when I visit the neighbors. Their reaction makes zero sense, but I’m a cooperative sort. I understand that my human thinks I’m an indoor cat, and I also get that they’re convinced that it was bad form for me to “escape” and then visit the neighbor’s house without an “invitation.”

However, I will avoid engaging in further such activities because I want to be nice to my human since the event clearly caused them stress.


7. Agree to Go on More Walks

My human seems to think it’s good for me to put on a harness and go for walks. I suspect that they’ve been reading stuff online again. Spot says that recent research suggests that humans behave more reasonably when they get a bit of fresh air and exercise; it appears to make them happier and help them live longer too.

The harness isn’t all that bad, and I like hanging out with my owner even when they do strange things.

A-woman-with-a-cat-on-a-leash-walking-along-a-path-in-the-park
Image Credit: Nau-Nau, Shutterstock

8. Be a Bit More Patient

Spot suggested that the current research hasn’t quite found an answer to why humans randomly change to a new type of litter when they can just clean the box more frequently to keep smells at bay! I can’t use a dirty litter box, but I resolve to be more patient and to count to 10 before going outside the litter box to remind them to clean it out.


9. Be More Creative

I’m aware that my owner would prefer for me to stop “destroying” items in the house. I resolve to add a few more activities to my arsenal to bring joy and mental stimulation to my human, and instead of destroying their belongings, I’ll focus more on my scratching post and toys. Humans like variety, and I must keep them mentally stimulated, or they’ll get bored.

One of our preferred scratchers, the Hepper Hi-Lo Modern Cat Scratcher, is a surefire way to keep your kitty out of trouble (or at least away from scratching the things they should not!). It's not only stylish, but it's functional as well. It's made of sturdy cardboard with a durable plywood and metal frame and can be set up in three different ways – high, low, or lower. The different positions encourage maximum engagement, exercise and stretching, and of course, intense scratching (they can throw their whole body into it). 

Hepper Hi-Lo Cardboard Cat Scratcher with Real...
  • Premium Materials - Hepper's cardboard scratcher is made with dense, B-flute cardboard, and a metal...
  • High, Low and Lower - A single cat scratch pad won't keep your cat engaged. 3 unique positions keeps...
  • Activates Muscles - The Hi Lo isn't just a cat nail file to stop the chief cat couch scratcher. The...

With the Hepper Hi-Lo, your cat gets to have a blast scratching like a maniac, and you don't have to worry about them causing so much chaos or scratching your stuff. There are even replacement cardboard pieces available, so you really can let your cat go to town on this, and know that it will be long lasting. Click here to learn more about this awesome scratcher.

At Catster, we’ve admired Hepper for many years, and decided to take a controlling ownership interest, so that we could benefit from the outstanding designs of this cool cat company!


10. Spend More Time With My Human

I resolve to spend more time cuddling with my human and complaining less about their shortcomings, like their physical limitations and lack of interest in playing games. Cuddling is a great way to stay warm, and my human’s lap is comfortable and snuggly.

I also promise to increase the amount of time we spend together. I’ll help out more while they’re working on the computer, and I’ll give them sweet wake-up snuggles every day for an entire year. Spot says that humans thrive in environments where they get lots of love and affection.

divider cats oct 2024

Conclusion

In the coming year, let’s celebrate all the gorgeous creatures with whom we share this planet. Cats improve our lives and keep us entertained, and they deserve special attention during the busy holidays. You may not be able to honor every one of your cat’s resolutions, but they’ll be overjoyed if you can help them with a few!

Related Reads:


Featured Image Credit: Sviatoslav_Shevchenko, Shutterstock

How useful was this post?

Click on a star to rate (you can leave written feedback after clicking submit)

Help us improve Catster for pet parents!

Your feedback really matters.

What did you like about this post? Also how can we improve it?

Join the conversation

Leave a Reply

You’re very welcome to leave a comment or question. Please know that all comments must meet our community guidelines, and your email address will NOT be published. Let’s have a positive and constructive conversation.

Talk With A Vet Online

Peace of mind,
anywhere, anytime

Affordable vet advice

The 5 Ways My Cats Makes Me to Be Illiterate

I love reading a good book and don’t seem to carve out enough time to really enjoy it. I usually find other things...

When the Wee! Isn’t So Fun: Feline Inappropriate Urination in My Patients

Hi, I’m Dr. Lauren! Read my introduction to learn more about me and my two adventurous cats, Pancake and Tiller. Putting aside Pancake...

Unfortunately, cats don't cross their legs and make the diagnosis of what's causing feline inappropriate urination easy!

Does Your Cat Believe That You’re a Cat, Too? John Bradshaw Has an Opinion on This

As most of you dedicated Caster readers know by now, I’m a total geek when it comes to cat science and behavior. When...

Kasha the Japanese Cat Demon: History & Myth Explained

What cat parents haven’t wondered if their cats will eat them one day? Sure, it’s the stuff of urban legends, but I’ve seen...

More related

We Chat With Pet Portrait Artist Thomas Dalsgaard Clausen

Pet portraits and artists are prevalent online, but rarely will you find someone who captures the essence of the animals he draws like...

I prefer paper over plastic.

Dental Procedures for Cats: How Olga Recovered From Surgery

Hi, I’m Christopher! Read my introduction to learn more about me and my silly Russian Blue cat, Olga. Dental issues are common in...

We Chat With Illustrator Sunny Eckerle About Her Bodega Cats

A few years ago, the illustrator Sunny Eckerle walked into a bodega in Brooklyn and found herself greeted by a cat. After assuming...

We Interview a Creator of Mousr, the World’s First Artificial Intelligence Cat Toy

In 2015, a crowdfunding effort for a product claiming to be the world’s first artificial intelligence cat toy hit Kickstarter. Named Mousr, the...

Keep reading

Is Kalanchoe Poisonous to Cats? Vet-Reviewed Toxicity Explained

Kalanchoe is a type of succulent plant, popularly kept as a houseplant. Although it is not considered one of the most dangerous, it is mildly toxic to cats and causes gastric upset, so you should try to keep it out...

Catster_Is Kalanchoe Poisonous to Cats

Why Is My Cat Misbehaving? 8 Vet-Reviewed Reasons

Cat behavior can often seem like a mystery. Cats experience a range of emotions that can influence their behavior. It seems that they can feel, for example, anger, stress, fear, and sadness ,which may understandably affect how they behave and...

owner petting a hissing angry tabby cat

Can Cats Eat Cheesecake? Vet-Verified Nutritional Facts

Cheesecake is a delicious, special treat for many people that is often reserved for special occasions. As cat lovers, we all want to share our special occasions with our cats, which means you may have thought about sharing some of...

Can Cats Eat Cheesecake

5 Best Litter Box Ramps for Senior Cats in 2025 – Reviews & Top Picks (Vet-Verified)

As cats get older, they face various challenges and may even need special tools to help them get through the day. One example is a litter box ramp that can help them enter and leave as needed. If you have...

iPrimio Cat Scratch Ramp

Why Is My Cat Not Eating After Our Move? Vet-Reviewed Stressors

Moving can be a very exciting experience, but it is also a very stressful time for all involved. After all, you are packing up your entire life and moving it elsewhere. Regardless of the distance and how smooth the process...

cat in messy house

Can Cats Eat Plantains? Vet-Reviewed Benefits & Tips

Plantains are a delicious nutritional fruity treat for humans. They are part of the banana family and offer nutritional benefits for humans, such as fiber, vitamins A, C, K, B, and antioxidants. If you have a cat that seems interested...

Can Cats Eat Plantains

How to Approach a Cat (10 Great Vet-Verified Tips)

Interacting with a cat is like trying to close a business deal. You do your research, pitch the offer, set expectations, and deal with any objections along the way. If all goes well, you’ve got yourself a new business partner....

british shorthair being stroked by a womans hand

Why Does My Cat Hide and Sleep in the Closet? 9 Vet-Reviewed Reasons & Tips

Cats are fun pets, but they can exhibit many strange behaviors, one being hiding and sleeping in the closet. We know it can be alarming when your pet suddenly disappears, especially if you aren’t sure why your cat might be...

ginger cat hiding in the closet