Like many cats you probably know, mine possess a strange and magical relationship with every bathroom in the house. Cosmo is especially fond of the loo that’s connected to my bedroom — the one where I shower every day. In fact, he has a menu of activities from which he chooses while I stand under the running water. He’s never at a loss for something to do because he’s carefully crafted the menu to include much Cosmo-riffic excitement. I’m certain you can identify with at least a few of these shower-time moves.
See for yourself — here are five of Cosmo’s favorite activities from the “Mom’s in the Shower” menu.
If for whatever reason (perish the thought) I forget to bring the young prince into the bathroom with me, he expresses his discontent from outside the bathroom door — and loudly. I can hardly enjoy my shower while listening to his plaintive mews and pounding paws, so I carefully make my way out of the shower and across the floor to open the door. Sometimes I don’t slip.
Cosmo has this thing with my puffy purple robe. Really, it’s a “thing.” I sometimes leave the robe on the bathroom floor while I’m showering, and when I peek around the curtain to see what my Cosmo is doing, I find him making serious love-biscuits (along with well-timed hip twitches) on top of the purple cushiness. He’s neutered and all, but the sight is always slightly unsettling. I halfway expect to hear Marvin Gaye music. I hope I never do.
When he’s not preoccupied with my robe, Cosmo is completely curious about what I’m doing behind the magical curtain. He likes to stand between the curtain and liner and watch me — like some creepy bathroom stalker. Occasionally he’ll stand on the tub ledge and bat at me through the liner. I hope to never meet a real bathroom stalker who bats at me through a curtain liner. Yikes! That’s the stuff of horror movies, right? Cosmo’s stalkerish behavior is more cute than terrifying.
You know what else is fun to do while Mom is in the shower? Knock crap over, and lots of it. More than once I’ve jumped because a shampoo bottle has crashed into the tub. Usually it’s because he’d been rubbing his face all over the bottle, eventually sending it off its balance. Other times jumps on the bathroom counter and swats brushes and barrettes onto the floor. It’s party time, I tell you — party time! If anyone knows how to have a good time, it’s cats.
If Cosmo has exhausted all his other options, or simply isn’t interested in batting tubes or hip-twitching on top of my robe, he’ll stand outside the curtain and meow at me. When I pull the shower curtain back to see him, he meows some more. You see, he has concluded that I’ve had plenty enough shower time, and now I must wrap things up, dry off and focus my complete attention on him. Because, poor baby, he’s so neglected. Haha. As if.
What does your cat do while you’re taking a shower? Tell us in the comments!
Read more by Angie Bailey
About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (originated right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.