My Saffy has always veered toward the lazy side of the feline energy spectrum. I know most cats are known for their inertia, but Saffy is kind of the gold standard. Even as a young cat, she was more of a slug than a cat. That doesn’t mean we didn’t try to engage her in activity. Oh, she’d play for a little while, but then she’d resort to an idle position, wanting us to bring the play to her. And we would. And do.
She loves to go outside on a leash and harness. That’s definitely another way we make sure the old girl gets some exercise. Speaking of “old girl,” Saffy just turned 15, so it stands to reason she has grown lazier in her golden years. Like, super lazier. If she were a superhero, her name would be Super Lazy. Boy, I’m kind of lazy in choosing superhero names, aren’t I?
My intention has never been, nor is it now, to make fun of her in any way. Her sluggishness is quite adorable, and watching her age has been sweet. She’s a total love. I won’t lie, though: She gives us all a giggle. Here are five ways sweet Saffy has become lazy(er).
Saffy’s the hunter of our bunch. With her paws of lightning, she would have been a beast out in the wild. She’s always “hunted” her toys (and sometimes socks) and either leaves them outside a bedroom door at night or drops them and begins howling, alerting us of her catch. My favorite move, however, is when she walks around the house with the toy in her mouth while howling. It’s a totally garbled “mrroroorororrow.” Of course we have to stop what we’re doing and tell her what a good girl she is and thank her for her gift.
These days, she doesn’t do as much of her traditional “hunting.” Instead she finds a nearby toy, stands by it and howls, pretending like she indeed captured the prey and carried it through the house just for us. We totally know she didn’t, but we give her the same “good girl” praise.
Saffy has always been fond on lying on top of anything folded. I know many cats do this, but — of our three — she’s the one who usually calls dibs on any new folded blanket, towel, or piece of clothing. We keep blankets folded in various parts of the house, just for her. In the old days, she’d make her way around to each blanket, spending a bit of snooze time on each one.
Lately, she settles on her favorite blue blanket and that’s all she wrote. She’s not looking for variety in her old age — she wants comfort. She can have all she wants.
This lady has been a lifetime counter-cruiser. I’m sure she is president of some local chapter of a counter-cruiser club (say that fast three times). She has always assumed she was super sneaky, but she’s not a small cat. We hear her exploring dirty dishes in the sink and pushing the butter dish with her snout. When she was a younger cat, she’s leap off the counter as soon as she heard us coming to bust her. And when she jumped from the counter, everyone in the house heard it: THUD!
She still loves her a countertop. She gets up the same way: by climbing on bar stools. The thing is, she can’t make that swift leap to the floor anymore, so when she’s busted, she’s busted. To her credit, she does stop in her tracks, hoping her frozen form will make her invisible. Sorry, Saff.
Saffy has spent a lifetime chowing her own food at record speed and then quickly going after the other two cats’ bowls. We needed to referee mealtimes, calling fouls left and right. When we believed she had exited the kitchen, she would sneak around the other way and zero in on the bowls all secret-agent like.
Don’t get me wrong: She still does this. I believe she’ll always be a complete food-jacker; however, now she moves a little more slowly and her fouls are fewer and fewer. Plus, she doesn’t toss her meal back as quickly as before. Maybe it’s her lack of teeth? Perhaps she needs kitty dentures. Totally off topic, but wouldn’t that be adorable?
As previously mentioned, Saffy likes us to bring the toys to her. In our house, she has always been called “paws of lightning.” That’s right — even though she’s a general lazy-pants, she has the fastest paws in the upper Midwest. Lying in her sedentary state, she’ll go after the feather at the end of a wand toy like nobody’s business. Her paws become a blur of action!
We don’t mind bringing the play her way. She still enjoys it, and the paws get a total workout. She might be a senior lady, but she can still whoop the other cats when it comes to catching anything.
Sweet Saffy will always be our silver queen of the slugs, and she’s simply marvelous.