November 29th 2014 11:00 pm
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Samsara is now an Angel
February 21, 1998 - November 1, 2014
Apologies. This is Mom, Carol. I'm afraid I haven't been able to bring myself to update Samsara's page until now. Many of you are on Facebook so you've known about this since the beginning of the month.
She had been going down at a fairly rapid clip since the end of September. I had her at the vet 3 days before she died and told the vet I didn’t want to do blood work to confirm what Samsara was already telling me. Her kidney values were on a rapid downward spiral. I expected her to last maybe two or three more weeks at best. I never counted on the crisis she had on Saturday evening, November 1st.
Over the summer the vet and I had pulled her through a period during which she was breathing at the rate of over 30 breaths per minute. We stabilized her at between 25 and 27. (Norm for a healthy non-asthmatic cat is about 24 bpm.)
That Saturday evening, around 7:45 she yelled once and came out from her (new) bed that I put down in her hidey spot. She jumped into the sofa and didn’t want to sit with me, and she didn’t want to or couldn’t look at me either. She preferred to be with Cassie who proceeded to groom her—alas, way too energetically. Poor baby’s head was bobbling up and down from being so well taken care of.
Then I noticed the breath rate which I was sure would calm down—sure that it was brought on from the jump. It didn’t calm down. I counted 40 bpm and freaked, that couldn’t be right! I counted again: 41. I had to get her to emergency. It made no sense to try to pull her through the crisis at this point. I had already been assist-feeding for the last week since she wouldn’t eat anything but treats on her own anymore.
She died peacefully in my arms shortly before 9:00PM. As she began her journey, her whole face relaxed and took on the look of the happy little cat who blessed me with her presence for 16 ½ years.
My apartment is quiet and my heart is broken. I love you and miss you baby girl.
What’ll I do when you are far away and I am blue?
What’ll I do?
What’ll I do with just a photograph to tell my troubles to?
What’ll I do? --George Gershwin
Aside from telling what transpired over that last week, I want to add some happy memories here too.
Samsara was (as was Marrakech ['Keshy'], her half-sister) the sweetest little thing. As you know from her profile page she was vocal as all get-out, and she was loud. There wasn't anything that she didn't have an opinion about that she didn't voice as quickly as she thought it. I called her my squawky old lady. (Do you know how many times she grumbled about crappy room service and late supper--even when it wasn't late?!) There weren't many phone calls I would have with anyone where she wasn't trying to get my attention. Callers would hear me interrupt my conversation to ask her what she thought. As many time as I asked 'what?' she would answer 'yeeeeeow'. I loved it. The house is so quiet now.
This little girl was all about figuring out how to get more lap time and and cuddles and 'horsey rides' on her mommy's back. She treated any new visitor to the house to her cuddles too. She would check out your lap, if she found you comfy she stayed. Vet visits--people would fuss over her in the waiting room and I would take her out of the carry bag and put her in their arms. She loved it!
And she was darn near an angel she was such a good girl for almost her whole life. With the exception of the one incident she described in her diary about getting shellac all over herself she almost never got into trouble.
And her only mean streak--unfortunately a long one--was when she and Marrakech ganged up on Colette and refused to accept her for almost a year. They both finally accepted/tolerated Colette about 3 months before Keshy went to the bridge. Samsara bonded closely with Colette after that.
I will always wonder about her in one respect. I used to say that she wasn't the sharpest knife in the box. I guess I'll never know if it was because she was too dumb to fight back or just plain fearless.
Samsara was always the one getting smacked by the other cats. Oftentimes it was because she was a pain in the butt. Misha finally gave up trying to intimidate--it didn't work. He would hiss and bop her when she was a kitten and she kept coming back for more. Samsara's idea of 'togetherness' with Colette was to walk down the hallway with her, shoulder-to-shoulder. That is until Colette turned around and bopped her. Samsara just kept coming back for more.
An aside--I have yet to create 2 new kitty pages--Cassie and Blossom--I adopted Cassie the day after Colette went to the bridge and Blossom three months later. I couldn't leave Samsara as an only kitty. That would have killed her. And sure enough, three days after Colette went to the bridge Samsara stopped eating. I had to assist-feed for almost three weeks straight. (I'm also pretty sure that Colette's death speeded up Samsara's demise.)
Cassie, my new 3-year-old, did things her own way. (Samsara accepted her 2 days after I brought her home.) Cassie acknowledged Samsara's alpha status and dutifully groomed her. First her head, then her ears--lick, lick, lick--chomp! Samsara finally learned to lift her paw to fight back.
By July, when I adopted 2-year-old Blossom, Samsara was already quite frail. It was amazing how gentle Blossom was with her.
Thank you all for your gifts and kind words. They mean so much!
Family of Ralphie, Maggie, Aggie, Theo and More – Angel Star
Family of River and Simone – Angel Star
Family of Beckham, Daisy, Augie, Angel Cali and More – Angel Star
Family of Milo, Smokey Joe, Sam and Mallee – Heart
Family of Salem, Lucy, angels Emily Felicity and Edgar, and Momma Julia – Angel Star
Family of Gimli, Django, Nikola, K.C. & Angels – Angel Star with Angel Kitty card
Family of (angels) Mia & Mikki, Miko, Milo and More – Angel Star
Angel Calvin – Angel Star
Family of Muppet, Nakita, Samson and Chico – Angel Star
Family of Ginger and Pappa Mike – Heart
Family of Fluffy and Alex– Angel Star
Family of Keisha and Sylvester – Angel Star
Family of Bella, angel Orange Ruffy, Smokie Boo, and Natalie the Natcat – Rose
Family angel Patches, Phantom and Spice E – Rainbow
Family of Wanda, Norman, Tess, Rupert and More – Heart
Family of Finnegan, Lacey, and Alex – Rainbow
Family of Minnie, Pennie and Bliss - Wings
Family of Hazel Lucie and Maizie - Candle
Family of Mayhem and Mommy Mary – Plenty of Horns of Plenty
Family of The ‘M’ Crew – Horn of Plenty
Family of Big Harry, My Orange Angel, Patches and More – Horn of Plenty
Family of Big Harry, My Orange Angel, Patches and More – Big Hugz
Family of Lady, Baby Sammie and Cesar – Horn of Plenty
Family of Bliss, Penelope and Minnie – Horn of Plenty
Pipo, Minko and Furmily – Horn of Plenty with card
Simon and Reuben (an angel) - Horn of Plenty with card
If I missed anyone, please forgive me. I’m extremely grateful for your outpouring of love for my baby girl.
Hugs and Purrs,
May 21st 2014 5:21 pm
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OMC, my gotcha day was on May 2nd. Where does the time go? Mom and I knew about it and kind of caturbrated it, but it wasn't the same as in the last few years. Keshy is gone, Colette is gone… and she'd only been gone for little over 10 days before my Gotcha Day came up. And, I still wasn't eating by myself on my Gotcha Day.
I spent the last two weeks of Colette's life curled up with her in the donut bed. First it was in the bed that Colette always used, and then Auntie Gail gave us the bigger bed 'cause her doggy, Misty, didn't want to use it.
Misty is a Pomeranian, so the bed was just the right size for me and Colette together. It was so nice sleeping like that.
Then, the day before Easter Sunday, Mom took Colette to the vet. That afternoon, I went back to the bed and I left a giant-size space there so that Colette could come cuddle with me. I left plenty of room, but Colette didn't come back.
I'm not sleeping in that bed anymore. Mom left the carry bag out and it has the blankie that Colette used to use in there. That's where I'm sleeping now.
I spent a lot of time in Mom’s lap and sitting on her shoulder after Colette went to the bridge, but then
three days later, I started feeling not so good and I didn't want to eat. Well--actually, it started maybe one and a half months ago when I had an emergency. I was in so much pain I could hardly walk. Mom was so afraid she'd lose me. It turned out to be impacted stool because my kidneys don't work so well anymore. That's when Doctor V said that Mom had to give me fluids every night. So now Auntie Gail helps Mom give them to me. Poor me...I get a pokey needle every night.
Mom says I'm really inventive when it comes to getting out of doing that. MOL, I just fuss so much and I’m so strong that Mom is afraid of my getting hurt so she lets me go.
Mom got really inventive too lately. She puts a throw blanket under me while I sit in her lap. She ties the front end around my neck like a bandana and she ties the back end around my hips and lets my tail poke through. Then she folds the extra material around my legs. I usually quiet down, but, the other night I tried to bite her arm (not enough to hurt her though). But, yuckers, I got a mouth full of her sleeve! The treats I get afterwards are a lot better.
I got so upset after Colette didn’t come home that I couldn’t eat. That’s when Mom took me to the vet.
The vet gave her all sorts of stuff to help feed me. At first, I didn’t want to take it, but then I realized it wasn’t so bad. Besides, I got all sorts of extra loves. We did that for almost 2 weeks. Anyway, Mom says that I rallied.
But you know what’s better than the extra loves and food squirted into your mouth? It’s better when I eat on my own. Mom spends way too much time anyway making me take all sorts of medicines that she puts in treats. And now she’s giving me stuff (Miralax) that she puts in broth. She says that stuff helps me poop.
We just realized that it's been over a year since Mom helped me paw a diary entry. Wow! Phew. Hard to believe.
We have some thank you's to write don't we? Thank you to effurybody for all the gifts we've missed thanking.
And thank you, for the most recent ones:
Meep and Bibi for the birdy for my purrday,
Simon and Reuben for For the ribbon heart with Eeyore for my gotcha day
Pennie, Minnie and Bliss for the red heart for my gotcha day
Pipo and Minko for the kitty hugs for my gotcha day
Platelicker for the kitty hugs for my gotcha day
Family of Nala Sue for the kiddush cup for Mother's Day
Caney Cat for the POTP.
We were going to tell you something else still, but Mom says she doesn’t want me to spoil a surprise.
Purrs & headbonks,
May 2nd 2013 11:41 pm
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Wow it’s our Gotcha Day—mine and Keshy’s!
And we’re caturbrating. We’d be caturbrating more if Keshy was still here to caturbrate with us.
Do you know that we’ve been together for 15 years now? Uh huh!
If you asked Mom, she would say I don’t sound like a kitten, but I play like one sometimes. Mom calls me her squawky old lady. She says she’s losing her hearing ‘cause of me, but I’m not so loud.
Sheesh, I’d know it if I was loud. Well, maybe I’m loud when I’m complaining about taking my asthma pill, and my stupid new medicines, that stuff to get my CBC numbers down. The V-lady says my red blood cell count is too high. (Deteriorating CKD numbers.)
You’d be yelling too if you got that yucky vanilla stuff (cimetidine) and that horse pill (azodyl). And Mom, what’s the big idea with the appetite stimulant (mirtazapine)? You give me the appetite stimulant and it makes me all talky and hyper and stuff. And then I’m supposed to get the horse pill every 12 hours on an empty tummy! But it feels like my tummy’s always empty! I’m hungry!
Can I help it if I don’t like the ‘scription food and the Halo Chicken kibble, and the Halo Grain Free kibble, and the Iams canned food, and the Iams Kibble, and the Wysong canned food and the Chicken & Venison Jerky treats and the Wysong treats and the Evo treats, and the Natural Balance Venison Salmon kibble, and the Duck Duck Goose raw stuff, and the… and the… and the….
Well …. maybe I like some of them some of the time. >^..^<
Well… instead of caturbrating all day with me, you know what Mom did! She spent part of the day doing stuff, and then she started doing other stuff. I complained. She says she has a show coming up so I helped sing while she was working on her songs. Then she started working on the stuff she says between each song and I helped sing. Then she started saying all the stuff she says again—I thought she needed a bit of accompaniment, so I helped sing. Then she chased me out!
I also help with all Mom’s telephone conversations. Yep—all of them. I sit in her lap so I can hear what people are saying so I can give ‘telligent opinions. Why do the people start laughing when they hear my opinions? Maybe I should have been a comedienne? What does it mean when Mom says that I don’t have an ‘off button’?
We wanted you to know that I saw V-lady last week (and I complained all the way to her office) and Colette saw V-lady too for follow up xrays. (Colette told me she complained too.)
I got all those new medicines and Colette just got a couple of pictures, and Mom says she got an empty wallet. (Huh?) Mom saw the pictures of Colette. V-lady said Colette’s pictures looked okay as far as she could tell. (Those pictures didn’t look anything like the ones Mom takes of us!) V-lady was going to forward them to a radiologist for another opinion. We’re still wondering what it means when V-lady pointed to all these little white areas and told Mom that the xrays were showing some calcification on the bones along the sides of the rib cage. Mom forgot to ask.
We haven’t heard anything from V-lady since. It’s safe to say that if there was bad news, she would have telephoned us already. I’m going back for another blood test in another 2 weeks, so Mom will ask then.
Anyway, thank you effurrybody for remembering me and Keshy. Mom says she feels so guilty ‘cause we haven’t had the time to be around to play.
We (sort of ) saw all the lovely gifties all the furs left for us over the past few months. Thank you sooo much. It’s so nice to be remembered.
And we’re going to take a look at your new gifts and messages tomorrow. My secretary and purrtographer is busy falling asleep. She didn’t get home till pretty late from class tonight. (I was starving …. And then she only gave me pills for the first hour after she got home.)
Wow! Fifteen years together! That’s a lot of time. And you know what? It’s hard to remember a time when we weren’t together. Mom thinks I’m pretty special and I’m so happy we gotted each other.
Yeooow! Purr… Purrr…Purrr….