Danger Cat!

Yesterday, my beautiful and talented girlfriend, Lucy, wrote me a song!
The song was written to accompany my 'around the carpet sliding' that I do so enjoy. To be sung to me by my mum and dad while they do the dragging.
It goes to the tune of spiderman.

Danger Cat, Danger Cat
Handsome Bladey the Danger Cat
Can he slide on the floor
Make the den his obstacle course
Look out
Here comes the Danger Cat

Is he hot, he's on fire!
He's the object of my desire
He devours yummy prawns
Then goes and toilets out on the lawn
Hey there
There goes the danger cat

In the still of the night
While locked in the house
He wakes mum and dad
Makes them grumble and grouse

Danger cat, danger cat
Handsome Bladey the danger cat
Sexy cat in leather chaps
Makes me swoon when he sings his raps

For handsome Blade, life's a crack up
Get too sassy, he'll give you a smack up
He's the hot handsome danger cat.

I'm so pleased with my song that I'm preparing something for her in return...

Check out my 'bird'.

You should see my girlfriend Lucy's slideshow, she is soooo beautiful....I'm so proud.

Giving them 'the runaround'.

I am an 'outdoorsy' kind of cat -always have been. My mum and dad would be happier, deep down, if I was a totally 'indoors' cat because they wouldn't have to worry about cars, dogs, local brats or me ending up in a takeaway meal etc.
They tried to keep me in before but I kicked up such fuss about it that they realised I'd never be happy as an 'indoors' cat.
So, reluctantly I'm let out more or less when I want. Well, as long as there's someone home and I'm not allowed out overnight unlike most cats in my neighbourhood.
Usually I abide by the rules. I never wander far from the back garden and I *usually* come in without a fuss at night.
The night before last, I decided to challenge the rules. I'd already come in for the night as far as they were concerned and they's taken off my collar (I always sleep naked) . I could see my friend, Soda outside in my garden. He's allowed out all night by his owners and was taunting me. I waited for the right moment...my dad (who's only got one pace -S L O W) went out the back door to put some crumbs on the bird table. On his way back through the door, I shot past him like a speeding arrow. "HAH!!! I'm freeeeeeeeeeee!" I thought!
I was overcome with mischievousness and dashed and darted all around the garden with glee. Soda was well impressed. I was just like him - a naked 'night-stalker'!
I could hear my mum saying "just ignore him...lets close the door and pretend we're not bothered..... he'll soon want to come in....blah de blah de blah..."
No you pair of suckers!!! I'm out for the night!!.... See me run around these plantpots!! Look at me!!....Look at me!!....I know your watching me through the window...LOOOOOOOSERS!!!
It didn't take long before they abandoned their 'pretending not to be bothered' plan. "Come and help me catch him..." I heard mum say to dad. How pathetic, that it would take 2 of them to catch ME - I'm only 1ft tall!!
I put up a valiant effort, but in the end I was defeated. It finished up with me on my back under a bush, fending the pair of them off with various kicking and biting moves. I think I could have evaded dad all night but mum lunged at me, grimacing as she took my blows. She wanted to get to bed so really I had no chance.
Iwas carried in, humiliated. Soda sniggered as I was carried past him.
I got my revenge though....I made sure I set my 'alarm clock' for 4.55am the next morning.Word.

What a great 10 days!!

The last 10 days have been absolutley fantastic!
Firstly, on Wednesday the 26th of April I was named as Catster *Cat of the Week*!! I just cannot describe how much of a shock this was! To be selected out of 68,000 cats was FABBY DABBY DOO!
My week as COTW just whizzed by! It was party, party party! Compliments....rosettes.....more rosettes.....lady -cats positively THROWING themselves at me......*wink*
I was actually COTW for 8 DAYS! Although this was a bonus it made it all the more difficult when I had to relinquish my throne. When I saw the next COTW announced, I felt literally wizened.....shrunken....crushed.....deprived and deflated (for about 7 minutes - then I recovered.)

Anyone who knows me in my neighborhood would never have guessed I had been living the life of an international superstar on Catster. I just mooched around the gardens and back allies with my usual nonchalance eating flies, drinking from the bird-bath, all the while knowing I had a bottle of catnip champagne (Nypstal - the very best) on ice down at Tabby Hall...

The climax of these heavenly 10 days is the Spring Fling occuring today over at Tabby Hall. Currently the tabbies are enjoying a hog roast and other gourmet delights, tuna punch and catnip brew by the gallon and are later too be entertained by a live band of tabby-point Siamese cats yippee-aye-eh!!!
Word.

Why are some humans so stupid?

I'm sorry for sounding so bitter today but I have to get something off my furry little chest....
I live very close by to an old peoples housing complex, ideal neighbours you might think? - think again. These houses are small one bedroom bungalows, just big enough for a couple of old age pensioners. So why is the house at the end of the road inhabited by at least six lunatics?!! I'm talking about the kind of people who steal milk floats at 3AM and drive them around under the influence of alcohol smashing into all the parked cars on the street as they go! (Yes this actually happened - and we are talking about a middle aged woman here!)

The lunatics decided to get themselves a pet. Now, what would be an ideal pet for a this houseful of lunes plus baby in the one bedroom bungalow with a 10ft square garden? A rabbit? A budgie? No, a fully grown adult Japanese Akita that has had previous behavioural problems.
Within a few days of owning the dog, it got out and attacked a neighbours King Charles Spaniel almost killing it and putting it in intensive care for two days. The police won't act because it was a 'dog on dog' attack. I know that with the right RESPONSIBLE owners and living conditions these dogs can probably make good pets but I've heard that they are inclined to attack other smaller dogs and cats as they are dominant dogs. Apparently it killed 2 cats at it's previous address.......

Yesterday evening it got out AGAIN, a neighbour came and warned my mum and dad and they got me in. I was not allowed out again yesterday so spent the rest of the day distressed and crying.
The dog warden was called but apparently they only work 'council hours'! WHAT USE IS THAT!!!??? The police didn't think it mattered because it's only attacked a dog before. After 2 hours of it being on the loose, the owners themselves called the police and said they were worried that the dog could attack a child if the child was walking a dog. My dad saw the dog about a mile away and tried to trap it in a garden (he's SO brave) but it got away. I went to bed hoping it would never return.....

This morning the dog was back again but guess what - a couple of hours later it got out AGAIN so I've had to stay in today AGAIN.

Everything was OK until that dog came to live here. Because of it's irresponsible owners who are incapable of keeping their garden gate closed, I'm having to suffer.
Why are some humans so stupid?
Word.

Aunty Fiona's Birthday...

Today is my Aunty Fiona's birthday. Here are a few facts about Fiona.
She's so OLD:
her memory is in black & white!
I told her to act her age, and she died!
I asked to see her birth certificate, and she handed me a rock!
she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp!
Jurassic Park brought back memories!
she DJ'd at the Boston Tea Party!
when she ran the 100 metre dash, they timed her with a sundial.
when she was at school...there was No history class!
she recalls when the Grand Canyon was a ditch.
she co-wrote the 4th Commandment.
when Moses parted the Red Sea, he found Fiona fishing on the other side!
Heh heh heh!...HAPPY BIRTHDAY FIONA!!

Word T.Y.M.

Help...I'm being penned in!

Oh no....has it really come to this?.....
I've got a horrible feeling I'm about to lose my liberty. They're hammering some 'stuff' all around the top of the garden fence. It looks like it's going to be too high (they THINK) for me to climb over.
I've heard them calling this stuff 'fern screening'. It looks a bit flimsy to me, l may even be able to gnaw through it....
Damn it! They KNEW I'm no good at climbing! They're trying to exploit my weaknesses.
This is all down to that Akita down the road that keeps getting out. It's ruined my life ever since it came to live around here. Suppose I shouldn't blame the dog, it doesn't have much of a life either. Perhaps that's why it's so ANGRY all the time?
I just heard dad on the phone to the shop, asking them if they have any more 'fern screening'....YESSSSS! The shop only have two rolls left! That's not enough to finish the job!
Heh heh heh! We'll see..... we'll see if they EVER get to contain The Bladester!
Word.

Kittens, kittens everywhere......not enough homes.

In all the animal shelters and cat rescue centres where I live in Nottingham, they are overflowing with kittens, not to mention the other older cats that are waiting for homes also. The older ones may get overlooked in favour of the kittens, who themselves could be having more kittens in just a few months time......
Everybody who looks after cats should please try and spay or neuter them before they add to the overpopulation of cats that already exists.
There are too many cats and not enough homes for them all.
Spaying and neutering not only prevents unwanted pets but also has secondary health benefits, such as preventing certain forms of cancers (mammary tumors in females and testicular tumors in males). Pyometra is an infection of the uterus which can and almost certainly at some point WILL affect unspayed female cats and dogs. It can be fatal if not treated promptly and is not as straightforward to treat as other infections. Pyometra cannot occur in spayed females.
There are other indirect ways in which it may prolong your pet's life also - most cats killed on the roads are un-neutered toms. Un-neutered cats roam and fight, picking up injuries and risking contracting incurable diseases such as FIV (the feline form of AIDS) and FeLV (Feline Leukemia Virus) which are both spread by bite wounds.

If the costs of spaying or neutering are a problem, remember that a pregnant cat and her kittens will cost more to feed than a spay operation would cost.
Find out if there are any reduced cost spaying and neutering clinics in your area. There is often help out there if you look for it.
In Nottingham there is a charity called P.U.P. (Prevent Unwanted Pets) who assist people on low incomes with the costs of spaying and neutering, they rely entirely on donations from the public. There may be similar schemes in your area.

Just remember that for every homeless and unwanted animal that ends up being put to sleep, there is a human somewhere down the line who was responsible for that happening....

We are the Tabbies - We are As One!

I am a member of the Catster Group 'Terrific Tabbies'. We have lots of excellent group activities which so far this year have included a 'Spring Fling', Picnic Party and even a magnificent Tropical Cruise. The fabulous album of our cruise was put together by one of our group leaders, Oliver
The founder member of Terrific Tabbies Miss Muppet is currently in the running for Pet Idol 2006. I urge everyone to vote for Miss Muppet, she is pet No. 6 in the competition. You are allowed one free vote per day and you can even buy some more votes, some of the proceeds of which are going towards a good cause - the Humane Society.
Any tabbies reading this should firstly join Terrific Tabbies and then vote for our leader Miss Muppet to win Pet Idol! Afterall, "We are the Tabbies! We are as one!"
Word.

How I made my own Catster backround.

Firstly, you need some kind of software that you can use to make the 'tile' (the image that repeats over the page to form a background).
I use Ulead PhotoImpact which came free with my digital camera. Then you need an account like a Photobucket account, that you can upload your image and link back to it with an url.
Then follow these instructions:
click for instructions