The Feline Philosopher

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Mom Says I Can't Eat Centipedes

June 4th 2005 1:06 pm
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Can you believe it? I thought it was a bit mean of her, but apparently she saw a HUGE one (at least two inches long!) in the bathroom last night, and it brought back unpleasant memories that she thought she had successfully suppressed. It seems that my predecessor, Adrian Mole, had quite the predilection for the many-legged creatures, and would often be caught munching on them. Gross! Well, that’s what mom says. In fact, she says it’s the grossest thing she’s ever seen, and went to a great deal of trouble explaining to me why she thought I should just leave them alone. She also added that if she ever caught me with one dangling from my mouth, she would not let me lick her for a full week! Personally, I think they’re amusing to watch, and probably full of healthy protein too. I’ve never tasted them myself per se, but if that other cat liked them, they can’t be that bad. Still, as she rightfully pointed out, I can play with other things, and I never go hungry, so maybe I should just leave the buggers alone. Okay mom, you win!

 

Quote

June 2nd 2005 11:50 am
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Another quote by my wise friend Theo:

"If you are worthy of its affection, a cat will be your friend but never your slave." - THÉOPHILE GAUTIER

 

Happiness

June 1st 2005 7:54 pm
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My mom just told me that she loves me more than any other cat, and that she always will. She's actually told me this many times before, but I always like to act surprised. She then gave me belly kisses, and I purred as loudly as I could to let her know that I love her too!

 

Identity Crisis

May 31st 2005 6:52 pm
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Help! Even though my mom has me listed as at least partially Russian Blue, I’m not sure that I am. She’s not either, but someone had told her that I looked as if I could be, so voilà, that’s what she decided I was. But, what if I’m something else? What if I’m a shorthair something-or-other? How would I even know if I were British, European, or American? Mom says it doesn’t matter what breed I am, and that even if I were no breed at all she would still love me because I’m the most loveable kitty in the WHOLE WIDE WORLD. That’s nice, and I appreciate the sentiment, but she knows her nationality, and I would like to know mine. Can anyone tell me by looking at my pictures? If not, how else could I find out?

Oh, and I haven’t told her, but I’m definitely heavier than 12 pounds. I won’t get on the weigh scale for her, and luckily, mom hasn’t figured out that all she has to do is weigh herself on the scale while holding me, and then subtract her weight from the total. Silly mom. And if she ever does clue in, I just won’t let her hold me! Tee hee. Nobody needs to know my real weight—I've been through enough. Don't you think?

 

Thank You

May 28th 2005 2:33 pm
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I would just like to thank all you nice Catster cats who have agreed to become friends with me. My mom tried to assure me that I would make some online friends soon, but I wasn’t sure at all. As she will tell you, I’m not the bravest cat in the world, and after she brought that other cat into the house who just ended up terrorizing me (I probably shouldn’t admit this because now you’ll think I’m the wimpiest cat ever, but the cat in question was actually a very brazen and self-assured four-week-old kitten), I didn’t think I would ever make any friends. Thankfully, all of you have proven me wrong, and I feel much better about myself!


“It is difficult to obtain the friendship of a cat. It is a philosophical animal … one that does not place its affections thoughtlessly.” - THÉOPHILE GAUTIER

 
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