August 21st 2009 12:45 pm
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The Bridge has been my home for over 6 months now. Mom and Dad still miss me, of course, and I miss them and our life together . . . the way it was . . . before illness . . .
I was very fortunate to live a long and happy life -- over 20 years -- most of it healthy and all of it knowing I was very much loved. I never spent time on the streets, except for a couple of hours once when I thought I needed an adventure, nor did I ever live in a shelter. Yes, I know I was one of the fortunate ones.
I'm still fortunate. Although I'm no longer physically with Mom and Dad, I live on in their hearts and in their memories. Their 20+ years of good memories are sometimes obscured by the sad memory of saying goodbye to me, but the good memories are still intact.
When Mom recently saw my photo again in the little rotating headline section of the Catster home page, this time she smiled. Karen Nichols (Skeezix's Food Lady) gave tips in The Cat's Meow for Creating a Memory Book. Her example is from the memory book she put together for my mom and dad, using entries written and contributed by Catster members, perhaps even you.
That tribute book is making a few stops before it's delivered to Mom and Dad. Right now it's at RayPod's for his pawprint. RayPod's mom sent a photo of the book, though, and you can also see a preview of the first few pages on Blurb. (*whispers* My mom ordered the other version of the book a couple of days ago, so they can have each version.)
Olde Furts Alex and Annie are on the other page of the sample memory book that's currently shown in that rotating section of the home page. Olde Furt Calvin is also shown in an example in the article on The Cat's Meow. If you look at the preview of the book on Blurb, everyone who happens to be included on the preview pages is identified.
Recently Mom spent some time reading again through the contributions for that book and also reading the many thoughtful and supportive pawmails she received after my journey to the Bridge. That reaffirmed her knowledge that most Catster members are unselfish, caring, kind and thoughtful. But it also reminded Mom that she never personally acknowledged more than a few of those kind messages, nor the gifts I received, nor the contributions to the tribute book... nor a lot of other nice things done in my memory.
The mom of one Olde Furt said after his journey to the Bridge that she hoped to pay the kindnesses forward when other cats and their families need it. My mom felt that was an especially considerate thing to do, so she's been trying to do that. She hasn't been very good at it, though, so I'll have to tap her on the shoulder to remind her to try harder.
To all of you who put thoughts of "self" and your own problems or grief aside in order to support others in need, who remember that no matter how great you feel your pain or your need is, others also have feelings, who exemplify the best of Catster by unselfishly going about your way, quietly paying it forward day after day, I give you a four-paw salute. Angels salute with all four paws at once, you know, because our wings hold us aloft.
Since Mom is working on recalling good memories, she wants to share a short video of me walking "the line" the day after my 20th birthday. You may have seen me walk the line before and, at age 20, I sure didn't do anything spectacular in this one! I even veered off course a couple of times, but eventually I got back on the line.
This video clip is special because two of my best Catster friends sent their moms to celebrate my birthday with me. At the beginning of the video, RayPod's mom says, "Good girl." You can't quite hear the first word, but she definitely said, "Good girl." I'm a good girl! ;) That's my mom who says, "Hi sweetie." In the background, Daisy's mom and my dad are talking. Dad was making a lot of noise with the grill, getting ready to cook us a turkey, one of my favorite things.
Here's the link to Remembering Scooter, the first of some happy memories Mom wants to share with anyone interested.
To everyone who's ever lost a beloved cat, I hope you've already found the place that holds your happy memories. To everyone who is blessed to have a beloved cat still with you, be sure to make some happy memories with your cat today.
gotta fly . . . ;)
June 5th 2009 7:58 pm
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I miss you, Scootie. It's 4 months today.
You know I didn't forget about you last month, even though I didn't write to you here. That was the 5th of May -- Isaac's Bridge date, Simba's birthday.
When I was helping Lola play the Cat Trivia Game a few days ago, we saw one of your photos with your whiskers highlighted by sunshine, along with the question, "How many whiskers does a cat have?" I helped Lola make sure she got that one right: 24.
A photo of you in the garden was on the home page for a while, too, for an article in The Cat's Meow, and then it showed up in a Catster newsletter. The purple flowers in the photo have finished blooming this year, and I couldn't help thinking of you every time I saw them in full bloom. They weren't as pretty without you posed on your little wall -- the "line" -- in front of them.
Things are lively around here with Lola. You didn't warn us she would start acting like a kitten once she got rid of those rotten teeth. Did you know?
She wants to fly the way you did, from the top of the refrigerator over and up to the top of the cabinets, just over 3 feet away. Once she gets there, she can walk along the tops of the open walls -- just like you did. She keeps eyeing it, sizing up the jump. I know we can't stop her anymore than we could stop you, so I hope she'll make it safely like you always did. She's a good jumper, but she's sooo little and her eyes as well as her aspirations are sooo BIG, I'm afraid she'll try something too big for her. But I was afraid when you tried stunts like that, too. You always had big aspirations, too, and weren't afraid to try for them.
I miss you.
April 5th 2009 9:20 pm
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It's been two months today since I last held you, Scooter. It seems like an eternity ago, yet sometimes it hurts like it was only an instant ago. I still love you and miss you . . . I hope you know I always will.
Three weeks ago we adopted another kitty -- Lola is her name. I think you already know about Lola, though, and probably had a paw in us finding her at just the right time, for her and for us. Thank you, Scooter. I miss you every day, but now Lola is bringing joy and smiles to us again. Thank you for the joy you brought to us for over 20 years.
Your plumbago is just starting to emerge from the ground. I had to look closely today to see that it's starting to grow again.
March 6th 2009 2:51 pm
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I've been remiss again saying "thank you."
Over a week ago, we received a package with lovely Nirvana Candles and candleholders from Alex (the Angel)'s mom. There were 2 "eternal love" and 2 "renewal" candles -- so appropriate. Thank you. (At least I wasn't completely rude this time. I thanked Alex's mom right away, but it's taken me awhile to get around to adding thanks here.)
We also received a card and note from Kassidy, Kayleigh, Maytag, "Angel" Cole and their mom. Thank you for thinking of us.
I also want to give a huge THANK YOU for each contribution to the tribute book. The entries are amazing and touching. Special thanks go to several contributors with recent losses of their own or who are dealing with health issues for their own beloved cats. I know writing something for Scooter had to be difficult and I'm not sure I could have done the same, so I really appreciate it.
Yesterday was one month since we said goodbye to Scooter. Spring is definitely on the way here. Her plumbago isn't showing new growth yet -- it's always a late comer -- but other things are springing to life. Scooter loved supervising our work in her back yard at this time of year, when the weather was nice. During the winter, she'd forget all about going outside -- she was tough but not stupid. It gets cold out there and a heated bed inside was much nicer. Spring renewed her interest in her back yard, though.
This morning the daffodils were blooming. Renewal . . .
p.s. Continuing computer problems along with some lethargy on my part are making me even slower than usual. I still hope to somehow respond to everyone who sent pawmails or gifts or wrote in the tribute book. However, I'm still trying to get organized and it's going s...l...o...w...l...y. Maybe my problem is lack of a plan. :) I want to add photos of the gifts and cards we received, too, but that hasn't progressed very far, either. I know, that's not even difficult . . . what can I say?
February 25th 2009 8:05 pm
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Hannah also wrote a diary entry about Scooter, which I saw just today. Although I know Hannah won't be reading this because her brother Zack is ill, just diagnosed with cancer, I still want to include a thank you here, for the diary entry with the recipe for Scooter Pie. It's a really sweet entry, too, and will go in a scrapbook with all the other diary entries on behalf of Scooter. THANK YOU, Hannah. I'm keeping Olde Furt Zack and your family in my thoughts.
We also received another card on Monday. THANK YOU, Thomas, PixieBelle, Leo, Lady, Cow!Cat, Dougal MacDuff, Fizzgig and Mom for the card and note.
The card was in one of the plastic sleeves from the Post Office saying "We Care" that we damaged your mail. The envelope was torn but the card inside was undamaged. The last time I received one of those "We Care" messages from the PO, it was with a box from eBay that was open and EMPTY. It was supposed to contain a Yeowww catnip cigar that Arnold P. ordered for Scooter, but the cigar was gone! I always hoped someone in the PO found the cigar, knew what it was and gave it to some other 'nip-loving kitty.
February 21st 2009 8:23 pm
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Cat's got my tongue, it seems.
I apologize for the lengthy silence and now this lengthy entry!
We're getting more accustomed to there being no Meezer voice around here, but those little sounds in the night, when I'm only half-awake, still make me think for just an instant that Scooter's moving around the house. Maybe she is . . .
Although I added hearts to Scooter's page, I've been unable to touch the heart of her page to update her bio or add photos. So, I haven't added photos of the gifts we've received. I can't, yet . . . but I want to and I will, soon.
I've fallen "silent" with thanks, too, and I apologize. We received more cards and gifts the past 1 1/2 weeks. For cards in the mail, THANK YOU to:
Phineas and Luna's mom
Diego, LuLu and mom
Frankie Sinatracat, Macaroni the Innocent and mom,
Marina, Tosca and mom,
Also, THANK YOU Sylvia and mom, for the card and the "Heaven Sent" balloon and message card, so we can send a message to Scooter. We'll wait until summer to release it from her back yard, when we know she'll be watching. One side of the message card is blank, for our message, and the other side says:
My Beloved Pet
Sunlight streams through window panes
onto a spot where you used to lie,
but now you are no more.
Though my eye are full of tears,
I thank you for the happy years we spent together
and for your love and loyalty.
I know I have to let you go, how I will, I do not know
but this balloon carries what I have to say:
I love and miss you very much.
THANK YOU Sasha, Natalie, Ceylon, Jasper and Sterling Mithril and their mom and dad for the gift of Cat Wind Chimes and Pet Prayer Flags from the Best Friends Store. They were our next-door neighbors for several years until they moved to Tucson. The Pet Prayer Flags are 4 small flags, each with a pawprint, and a 5th flag with this message:
You have gone ahead
And nothing is the same
Leaving paw prints on my heart
That will always remain.
We also received a card from Scooter's vet with a handwritten note. Scooter was treated at an emergency/specialist clinic at the end, not by her regular vet (some days, I regret that). She wrote:
"I wanted you both to know how sorry I am for the loss of your beloved little Scooter. You both should be very proud of the meticulous care you gave her. She was in the best tender loving hands possible. I know you will miss her very much but also know that her sweet (and feisty) spirit will be in your heart always. May all your happy memories of her bring you comfort. Please know that you are in our thoughts."
Thanks, also, to those who wrote diary entries mentioning Scooter. Some are especially meaningful. I hope I didn't miss any. If you wrote about Scooter and aren't included below, please send a pawmail to let me know. The links below are to the diary entries, and I included the 6 listed previously for the sake of having one complete list. THANK YOU (in alphabetical order):
Alaidh, in her blog -- (Alaidh's Catster page)
Alex (The Angel)
Arnold P. and Arnold P. again and Arnold P. again
Ashley of Grimalkins Moon and Ashley of Grimalkins Moon, again
Bear (Best Cat Ever) 1992-2008 and Bear (Best Cat Ever) 1992-2008, again
Dave and Dave, again
Edgar and Edgar, again
Ka - zar
Sally Maria and Sally Maria, again
While I've been silent, I've been re-reading the messages received by pawmail and with gifts, the diary entries, group forums and messages, The Cat's Meow tribute, the submissions for the tribute book, and looking at the photo strolls. It still doesn't seem sufficient, but all I can say is thank you, from the depths of my heart.
February 11th 2009 7:11 pm
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The mail came twice yesterday -- sort of. Apparently it came very late on Monday, so late we thought we hadn't received any mail at all. We can't see the neighborhood mail boxes from our house so we don't know when the mail is delivered. Yesterday morning there were cards and a package waiting in our box, from Monday's late delivery, then more cards came in the real Tuesday delivery later. Two more cards arrived in today's mail. I can't even express how much they mean to us.
Thank you, Isaac's staff for the card and the ornament of an angel lifting a kitty to heaven. It's wonderful! The same ornament can be seen in the background of this photo of Pedro, Isaac's brother. I'll try to get a good photo of our ornament to add to Scooter's page, soon.
For sending cards and messages, thank you to:
Hazel Lucy and mom;
Hailey and mom and cat family;
Calvin's mom and cat family;
Taz's mom, dad and cat family;
Arnold P.'s mom;
Merlin and Creatures;
Sammie's mom, dad and cat family.
A Tribute Book
I feel strange promoting a tribute book for Scooter, but Scooter has some friends who might not know about it otherwise.
Skeezix (with a little help from his Food Lady) will put together a book if enough submissions are received. You can read more about it on The Cat's Meow and also at http://scootertribute.blogspot.com/.
On blogspot.com, you'll see the entries submitted so far, along with instructions. To make a submission, log in with:
….. username: firstname.lastname@example.org
….. password: scooter2009
Please don't feel you need to contribute money, though -- I'll make sure it's paid for, since we'd be the beneficiaries of it. If you already wrote a remembrance in The Cat's Meow Tribute to Scooter, in your diary or elsewhere and you would like it included in this book, just copy it over onto blogspot.com and submit a high-resolution photo of yourself and your Catster ID along with it.
Skeezix wants all entries before March 1, just a couple of weeks away. You can edit your submission up until then, too.
Scooter's ashes were returned to us today. Her urn is still out being engraved, so her bodily remains will stay in the little wooden box for now. Her spirit is surely soaring, though, free of pain and illness. I heard that some Heavenly Catnip was dropped over The (Endless) Summer of Scooter group recently. Maybe . . . ??
We miss our little girl. I never realized how much I automatically think about her with almost every move I make, checking to make sure she's not sitting under my chair or standing right behind me, making sure there are no obstacles in her way or papers lying around that she might slip on, checking to make certain she's okay before we leave the house.
But I've quit looking to see if she's in the front window, on the back of that flowered sofa, every time we drive up to the house. The spot where the litter box sat in the laundry room doesn't look quite as glaringly bare as it did at first. I'm not sure what to do with the extra space in my closet, though, where her case of baby food and case of fluids sat.
I mailed some unused things to some of her Olde Furt friends today and I'll give the rest to a shelter here, but we'll keep some things that might make another kitty, or two, happy to be part of our family . . . some day. Not right now, though.
February 8th 2009 7:31 pm
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We realized today that we adopted SooLing on Feb. 10, 1984, then Scooter joined us in 1988, so we've had at least one Siamese beauty living with us continuously for nearly 25 years. It's lonely around here now, especially at 4 a.m, which has been the "Scooter love hour" for many years.
I doubt these friends would love Scooter meowing in their face at 4 a.m., but they showed some love for her in their diaries. Although I've seen 30+ entries (hope I haven't missed any!) I'll include just a few at a time, with links, if you'd like to read what others have written. Here's the first group, in no particular order.
Sullivan for his diary entry and for the good times Scooter had when you teamed up to catch perps!
Daisy, or Doodle, as Scooter called her, for the lovely diary entry, among other things. A big hello to Daisy's mom, too, for coming to celebrate Scooter's 20th birthday with us.
Chai Latte-Capone for her diary entry with the Ode to Scooter (love it!) and for purring for Scooter in an earlier diary entry. Thanks for becoming an Olde Furt for a while, too, Chai.
Elvin for his diary entry. It was a sweet diary entry, so I'm sure it was Elvin, not his Evil Twin, who wrote it.
The other Albuquerque Scooter for the diary entry, among other things, AND for the great time Scooter had riding along with you and Nikko in the Blue Brothers caper.
Lovely Lucy for sending purrs in this diary entry. Scooter and Lucy became friends only recently, while playing the Name the Breed game in the forums.
February 7th 2009 11:20 pm
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Thank you for sharing our love of Scooter, and thank you for understanding and even feeling some of our sorrow. Of course we're grieving, but we're trying to find the places in our hearts that hold the best of the 20 years of wonderful memories with Scooter and push some of the last couple weeks' memories into a small corner. That's hard at first, as so many of you know.
One memory about Scooter is from when she was young, although I can't remember her exact age at the time. From the very beginning, she was my girl more than her dad's, then I nursed her through some kitten illnesses which furthered our bond. She was always very affectionate to me, but one day her dad remarked, in her presence, that she wasn't very affectionate. I swear Scooter understood what he said because she became more affectionate to him from that day on. SooLing was still his girl, though, and Scooter was mine. Then when SooLing went to the Bridge and her dad was "available," Scooter moved right in to fill the void for him. We both miss her dearly.
Scooter was our special girl and she meant the world to us. Was she more important or special than your kitty, who means the world to you? No. Scooter just happened to have a lot of friends in this place called Catster, where we start out to show our love for our own cats and then, somewhere along the way, start to love others' cats almost as if they were ours. Is the love real? It feels real, doesn't it? To have so many others feel and express their love for Scooter means so much to us that "thank you" seems inadequate.
I haven't yet answered messages nor thanked anyone for the rosettes, stars, gifts, diary entries, special photos and other tributes to Scooter. It's certainly not because I don't appreciate them but because I'm astounded by the number and don't know when or if I'll be able to send thanks to each of you individually. I'm touched not only by the heartfelt messages from friends but by the gifts and messages from those who didn't even know Scooter. Your thoughtful support, generosity and compassion are truly appreciated. Thank you.
I can't include individual recognition for everything at once, so I'll start with some special things that aren't on Scooter's page.
.....Karen Nichols (Skeezix's Food Lady), for The Cat's Meow Tribute to Catster Superstar, Scooter. Thank you!
The contributors to the Tribute, some of Scooter's close friends who, I hope, know how much I appreciate what they wrote as well as their friendship and support:
.....RayPod. I must mention that Ray's remembrances were added the day after the Tribute was first published, so if you haven't seen it, I'd love for you to go back and read it. Scooter's "Ray of Light" reveals a "secret" which started as a silly joke between the two way back in 2006, then turned into a lasting friendship.
Thank you all!
.....The 51 others (last time I looked) who left comments on the Tribute. Some are dear friends but some did not know Scooter well. Even The Catster Cat paid tribute, saying in part, "The tails at HQ are flying at half mast for you . . ." As Calvin would say, Wowza!
Thank you all!
.....Whoever at Catster HQ put the "Farewell, Scooter...", her photo and link to The Cat's Meow Tribute on the home page. Thank you!
.....A special tribute to Scooter from our personal friends. They're dog people, but good friends nonetheless. ;) Thank you!
.....A Best Friends Sponsorship of Mrs. Crinkles from two of Scooter's dear and long-time friends, Louis LeBeau and Ethan (and their mom). Thank you!
.....A gift of zealies from Sparky and his Dogster family members Bow, Ralph 73-87 and Arrow 88-95. Scooter didn't know Sparky very well so I thought that was especially sweet. Isn't Sparky cute? Thank you!
.....A plant -- a Peace Lily -- was delivered to our home this morning, from another Albuquerque Olde Furt and special friend Simon and family, known as the New Mexicats and Dogs, and their mom, Ali. I apologize for the less-than-great photo, Ali -- the plant is beautiful (I'll get a better photo!). Thank you!
I'll add more "thanks," perhaps in a few days.
If you wish to view gift and rosette messages to Scooter and find it easier to use our family page, here's that link: http://www.catster.com/family/90752.
February 5th 2009 7:01 pm
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Scooter has always been Our Angel and always will be. Our Angel made her journey to the Bridge this morning to join her many Angel friends.
Scooter slept comfortably on the loveseat in our bedroom last night. Around 3 a.m. she got off the loveseat, unassisted, then walked to the front of the house to get into her favorite wicker chair, making a litter box stop along the way. This has been her habit lately, to move to that chair in the early morning hours. She jumped into the chair on her own, too. She was a little winded from the effort and started breathing harder, but then settled down and began napping comfortably again.
Later she even ate a little chicken baby food from my finger, but the effort taxed her breathing to the point that she had to lie down and allow herself to recover again. Scooter had been using "mind control" since she was a kitten and we knew she still was. She willed herself to relax and get her breathing under control. That's when we knew we had to help her get to the Bridge today. We couldn't let her live that way, being exhausted from taking a few licks of food, and we couldn't allow her condition to get any worse.
When the sun came through the windows this morning, she left her chair and headed for her sofa, the flowered one that's completely faded by the sun because we never had the heart to move it away from the sunny windows. She liked it there. She loved sitting on the back of that sofa in the sunlight or getting down on the windowsill behind the sofa to roast awhile in the sun. The back of the sofa is pushed up against the windowsill and that kept her from falling off the narrow sill. It was a perfect little Scooter-sized spot for napping. We couldn't possibly have moved that sofa. We had to raise the blinds for her every day, too, not just open them. She wanted unobstructed sun and visibility in the lower half of the windows, and we made sure she got it.
When she headed for that sofa this morning, I lifted her onto it. She could have jumped up herself, but I wanted to touch her again and save her some effort, too. She climbed up to the back pillow to relax and look out the window, then moved into the sunshine to bask a while before going back to her wicker chair for another nap. We're so thankful for the sunny day and seeing her enjoy the sunshine one more time.
Scooter was happy to be home, we're certain of that, and we're happy she could enjoy some of her favorite spots again. Being an Olde Furt, she liked her routines and she was still sticking to hers as much as she could. That was comforting to us and I truly believe it was comforting to her, too.
Scooter was comfortable and never in real distress after we brought her home. Yes, she got winded easily, but all those purrs really helped and it didn't develop into any distress for her. We're thankful for that.
Before this week's events, we had scheduled a mobile vet to come tomorrow. The intent was to possibly use him as Scooter's vet (or one of her vets), in order to spare Scooter a 40-minute trip, each way, to her vet. We called him last evening to tell him what had occurred and to say we would likely ask him to help her pass peacefully on Friday. As we talked, I asked if he knew of another vet who might be able to come today if needed. Although this was his day off, he said to call if we needed him and he'd try to get here. I called him this morning and he came shortly after that. We're thankful for him.
I held and caressed Scooter against me as she fell asleep from the first sedative. Her dad was right there petting her, too. It seems odd to say it comforted me, but it did. Scooter comforted me. I hope I never forget the feel of holding her against me . . . next to my heart.
Scooter passed peacefully.
Friends came to be with us after the vet left and they stayed with us for several hours. We're thankful for them, too.
We're especially thankful for all the purrs that surrounded and comforted Scooter through the night so she could rest comfortably. That's a whole lot of love out there from all of you. Scooter felt it and we feel it. Thank you.
A special thank you to the Olde Furts, the Olde Furts Junior Auxiliary and the Angels who gathered to watch over Scootie and meet her at the Bridge. Please, if you joined Olde Furts to purr for Scootie, stay in for at least a day or two so I can read the messages and threads and have a chance to know who you are.
I saw Scootie's photo on the home page, too, looking through a few tears but she's still beautiful that way. Karen, I have not read your tribute yet but I'm going to as soon as I post this. Thank you! Thank you to Catster, too, for including her on the home page.
I removed the "protection" from Scooter's photos since some friends wanted to put her photo on their page. You may use a picture if you wish but I ask that you please keep your own main photo and use hers elsewhere on your page. Scootie's still new to this Angel business and she wants to see YOU when she looks down from the Bridge tonight.
Thank you, all, for everything. That isn't enough to say, I know, but I'm a little overwhelmed right now.
Bonnie, mom to Scooter ~ Our Angel
p.s. The analysis of the fluid in her chest was "inflammation." That doesn't pinpoint what was causing it, but it was not a treatable infection.
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