So your cat knocks over your beverage and your turkey sandwich is now swimming in a pool of lemonade (or gin and tonic — envision what you’d like). You race for a towel to sop up the mess and look over to see your cat stretched out in a sun puddle, looking perfectly adorable. Conundrum! You’re supposed to be a little bit frustrated, but you also know your cat’s a big tipper so this is also sort of your own fault and, dang it, how can you be mad at a face like that?
I totally get it. There are particular pussycat facial expressions, body positions, and overall vibe that charm me out of any sort of bad mood. They know this about me and use it like fine weaponry — especially when they know they’re in trouble.
Here are six cats who could get away with most anything with me.
1. The roly-poly
Every one in a while Phoebe pulls this one. She knows I’m powerless to the kitty belly and the promise of prime cat-huffing. If she steals something from my dresser or runs off with my pen, she knows this move is her Get Out of Jail Free card. I mean, would you look at her? Manipulation city, baby.
And do you think she’d oblige if I moved in to rub her belly? Hell, no. Rabbit kick to the face, for sure. But by that time, she’d already softened me, so she’s back on top.
2. The peeky teeth
Oh, man. I have a thing for peeky teeth. They’re insanely cute, and a flash of a fang gets my cats out of trouble every time. Instead of feeling cranky because somebody walked across my keyboard and deleted my document, I run for my camera. Cat: 1, me: 0. As usual.
3. Look, a kitten!
I don’t share my home with a kitten, but I’m fairly certain if I did, that precious baby would get away with everything. A kitten doesn’t even have to rely on peeky teeth for redemption. A kitten doesn’t have to change position, purr or cuddle in our laps (although that is a bonus). A kitten simply has to exist.
4. Of yawns and bags
This cat gets double immunity. First of all, she’s chillin’ in a bag. Who can resist a bag-o-cat? And then there she goes with the yawn. Yawns = squinty eyes, full-on view of teeth and the possibility of adorable kitty noises. A yawn alone is enough to gain immediate forgiveness, but put that yawn inside a bag and forget about it! That’s one smart cat.
5. “I’m a silly kitty!”
One no-fail way for a cat to make me forget any and all offenses is to make me laugh. Cats are high-larious, and my three are masters at seamlessly transitioning into, “Look at me! I’m a silly kitty!” If they can evoke a giggle, they know they’re home free. And then, like a giddy, amnesia-ridden fool, I skip off to find my camera.
6. The almighty cat smile
Have you ever seen a cat who looks like he or she is smiling? That, my friends, is one of the best things I’ve ever seen. Maybe in my life. Plus, you get peeky teeth, which assures the grinning cat will not only avoid getting in trouble, he or she will likely be given carte blanche for any future transgressions. The smiling cat is the equivalent of the Puss in Boots eyes from the Shrek movies. Humans are powerless.
Are you a sucker for a particular type of cat face? Tell us about it in the comments! And post a pic!
About the Author: Angie Bailey is a goofy girl with freckles and giant smile who wants everyone to be her friend. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, and thinking about cats doing people things. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that may or may not offend people. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.
Read more by Angie Bailey:
- How Does Your Cat Greet You When You Arrive Home?
- 5 Parts of Cat Anatomy That Crack Me Up
- My 6 Favorite Things I Saw at the Minneapolis Cat Video Festival
- My Cats Are Addicts: 5 Reasons They Would Land in Rehab
- 5 Ways My Cats Look Like Food
- 5 Ways I Suffer Physically to Appease My Cats
- Do You Kiss Your Cat on the Lips? Um, I Do!
