October 27th 2010 6:56 pm
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OK, my loyal fur-riends. It's taken me a couple of days before I could dictate my thoughts...but...THE MEOWMMY LEFT ME. ALONE. IN THIS HOUSE. So that SHE could traipse off to Purris to go see some stupid, meowin' rock concert!!!!
I'm OK now. And don't get me wrong. I wasn't EXACTLY alone, purr se. My Aunt Joyce who lives upstairs kept coming down to fill the bowls, scoop the poop and yell, "COOOOOPIEEEEE...where are YOU?????"
And while I was hiding under the couch, I could hear her talking to Meowm on the phone in that Purris place. Apparently, Meowm had to tell her where to find the extra chicken food because I was having NOTHING to do with that turkey.
I did manage to cause some trouble while she was gone. Meowm strategically placed one of the big Halloween animatrons right by the entrance to where I can jump behind the entertainment center.
Now...I didn't realize this...but Meowm told Aunt Joyce to check and make sure that the decoration wasn't "disturbed." Becuase that meant that I climbed behind there.
Well...Aunt JOyce went and ratted me OUT. WHILE SHE WAS ON THE PHONE WITH MEOWMMY IN PURRIS!!! And then she proceded to wedge that stupid witch in so that there was NO WAY I could sneak behind the TV. What NERVE...
OH...and I got really bored because Meowm wasn't here to turn the red dot on for me. So I carefully DUMPED OVER my TOY BOX and strategically tossed ALL OF MY TOYS around the dining room! MOL!
But then Meowm came home. She was all tired because she had a lot of Merlot and screamed and danced and CRIED at the stupid Eddy Mitchell concert in Purris...and she flew through what she calls, "Switzer-friggin-land" just to get to Purris.
And the FURRY FURST thing she did was pull out the bag from the pet store that was right around the corner from her hotel. She told me that the French dude in the store even asked her if she was buying a gift for her kitty...and then he SPRAYED THE BAG with CATNIP. Meowm said he pronounced it, "CAHT-NEEP." And that he was really nice. And really French. Whatever that means...
And I was happy...and I kissed her...and I loved her...and I followed her to the potty...and back...and then we had REAL chicken...and I kissed her...and I loved her...and I followed her back to the potty...and I have been stuck to her butt ever since SUNDAY.
OK. Just shuddup. I'm a MEOWMMA'S BOY! There! I admitted it.
And do you know what she said??? "Maybe I should go away more OFTEN!!!"
Got some really cool toys, though. From Purris. And tons of treats.
Stupid Purris. Stupid Eddy Mitchell. I don't care if he has a zoo of cats and every one of his songs has a kitty reference! HE and PURRIS took my MEOWMMY AWAY. But I got toys...and kisses...and treats...
I'm just fur-klempt.
Purrs, dudes, because I just can't write any more...
October 16th 2010 2:19 pm
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Wow...I'm just sitting here thinking...and it's really been a busy month.
Furst and Furmost...it was MY BIRFDAY. I know, I know...Meowm says the Gotcha Day is more important...but birfdays are fun, too! Meowm and I are both only children, so she understands that it's the one whole day out of the year that's all about YOU.
And speaking of birfdays...Meowm's was yesterday. We're a week apart! And I still remember Meowm laughing when our adoption counselor told her my birth date. Meowm said, "This could be perfect harmony, or it could get really ugly with TWO libras in the house!" MOL (Note: Usually, it's a little of both!)
We spent a lot of time snugglin', which she said is the bestest gift she could receive. (Because I'm sooooo CUTE, you know!)
Oh, and then we had company. LOTS of it. Everyone likes to come over in October -- to celebrate our birfdays and to see the Halloween decorations.
Auntie Heather brought my baby cousin Alex over. I spent the entire time under the couch because that baby Alex just scares me. But do you know what her favorite word is? CAT. EVERYTHING is a CAT. Meowm swears that one day we shall play in harmony. We'll see about that...
And then Auntie Lori came for a visit. Siiiggghhh...Auntie Lori is my FAVORITE. She's one of Meowm's bestest friends from college...and she's the ONLY person I will come out for. And that's because she smells like THREE kitties!
Meowm was SO PROUD of me for playing with Auntie Lori and giving her kisses. She said it was a huge breakthrough for this shy kitty.
And now...there's something strange that's supposed to happen this week. Apparently, the Meowm is going somewhere called...Purris?
I guess this Purris place is kinda far away because Meowm keeps threatening me, saying, "You BETTER be good for Auntie Joyce while I'm gone..." I guess she's going to be out of the house for a few days because Auntie Joyce only babysits when Meowm isn't here to feed me.
Meowm's putting all kindsa stuff in bags today. And I guess she needs a ticket and a little blue book to get there. She swears it's just a long weekend, but does she realize how LONG a weekend actually is for a CAT? I better get extra lovin's when she comes home...that's all this cat has to say...
So anyway, furs, it's been a busy time here at our house. I just hope you're having as much fun as we are this Halloween season! It's our favorite time of the year...
October 9th 2010 6:05 pm
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Meowmmy and I are both furry sad. One of our dearest Catster buds, Teddy McLovin, went to the Bridge today.
Meowm said she was so lucky to have met Teddy. She said he was shy like me, but that he mustered his courage and came out to let her pet him. She said he gave really good head-butts, too.
Everyfur, please purr not just for Teddy, but for his brother BK and his mom.
October 9th 2010 1:56 pm
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Hi, Everyfur --
I just wanted to thank everyfur who sent me gifties for my birfday! I don't want to name names because I'm afraid I'll miss someone, but I loved everything! And thanks for taking the time to make my day so special!
I had a nice day. I got a ton of toys -- a Nanner, a catnip lamb, a pheasant, a duckie with real feathers and a bunch of other stuff! I even got extra treats! YUMMM.
Oh, and my Auntie Julie got me a heated bed! It's so nice and toasty. I could just nap all day in it. (And I have been! MOL!)
Now...Meowm's birfday is next...and then...MEOWLOWEEN!!!! YAAAY!
August 25th 2010 2:23 pm
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OK, fur-riends. Let me just preface this by saying...I really do love my Meowmmy.
BUT SHE'S CRAZY! BAT-MEOWIN' CRAYZEE!!!!
Last year, I was still a baby kitten. Everything was new to me. And honestly...in my babiness...I just didn't know any better.
This year...I'm a big boy. Almost two whole years. And I KNOW my birfday is in October. Which comes about three weeks before Halloween. And October is still a LONG WAY OFF. Especially in CAT TIME.
Sooooo...HELLOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! WHY IS SHE PUTTING UP THE HALLOWEEN DECORATIONS???
She says she has two weeks off so she's getting it out of the way. She can just be quiet, because I know the TRUTH. She did the same thing LAST YEAR. She just loves Halloween!
The twinkle lights do look nice. All. Seven. Strands. Of. Them. (And she said she's not done yet???)
Purrsonally, I can't wait until she pulls out the tap-water coffin fogger. That water tasted really good last year. Even made me puke!
Ummm...OK...so maybe I kinda like Halloween, too. Just a little. I even kissed her Chuckie Doll last year! She thought that was funny. I was just being affectionate!
Do your Pawrents decorate for Halloween? Are they as crazy as my Meowm? I kinda hope so...it's actually -- shhhhhh... -- kinda fun!
August 9th 2010 8:29 am
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Good Evening, Everyfur. Tonight, we bring you a furry special -- and furry serious -- epsiode of Coopurr 360. Tonight, dear fur-riends, we will talk about GROUNDINGS.
Allow me to give you some background. Last Saturday, I was unjustifiably grounded because I didn't want to go to the V-E-T. For three hours, the Meowther chased me all over the house, moved furniture around and made me claw her up and down and sideways.
Oh...and we were so late to the appointment that the Meowther had to call and tell them what was goind on. Uhhh...who CARES?
She said I ruined a shirt...but for that afternoon...she ruined a life. A sweet, little life. MY life.
If that wasn't bad enough, she grounded me from Catster then hijacked my diary and told ALL OF MY FUR-RIENDS that I wasn't allowed to play for a week.
My dear fur-riend, fellow Blue and Mentor, The Great Pharoah Loki, immediately went to his diary and took to my defense, begging everyfur out there to FREE COOPURR.
And thus...he was unjustifiably grounded -- exiled, if you will -- by HIS Meowther for sticking up for me.
Tonight, I am so pleased to welcome the Pharoah Loki to the 360 Studio to talk about...GROUNDINGS.
COOP: Loki, my good fur-riend, thank you so furry much for agreeing to come on the show and discuss this...harrowing experience for both of us.
Now...you came through for a fellow Blue like the bestest of mentors. You jumped right on your diary the second you found out that I got (unjustifiably) GROUNDED from Catster. You were doing what you always do, and just trying to help a fur-riend. AND THEN YOU GOT (unjustifiably) GROUNDED. How did that make you feel?
PHAROAH: It was worth it my friend! I was of course furious, after all I am Pharaoh! I command all! I was only coming to the aid of my fellow blue and friend..and I was punished! Exiled!
She said I was inciting a riot! Hmmmph...
COOP: Disturbing, Loki...sad and disturbing. You know, while I was grounded, Meowmmy kept telling me to *think* really hard about what I did wrong. So I thought about it. And I thought about my three-hour struggle, fighting her and hiding from her to stave off a vet visit. And I concluded that I DID NOTHING WRONG. What did you think about while you were grounded? And what did you learn from the experience?
PHAROAH: What did I think about? REVENGE! A lot of revenge! So much revenge I will need another century to enact it all!
I learned I will enact revenge First before getting grounded..I will write a book on Groundings and How to Enact Revenge Before Punishment! I will sign the first copy and dedicate it to you Coop, my inspiration.
COOP: No, Loki -- you are MY inspiration. Just there to help a bud, and to do what's right when a pal gets (unjustifiably) grounded! But...did you do anything special while you were in exile? I basically did the same thing I do every day -- nap and watch the birdies through the window. But I was sooooo BORED without Catster! How did you occupy your time?
PHAROAH: I called down plagues of water bugs to infest Mammas bathroom..Worked on my Book Of revenge of unfair groundings..I called down more plagues of June bugs to infest her room and make her scream! I planned my next riot too! I also yakked up many gooey hairballs for her to discover in the night! You Do Not want to know what I left in her shower! MOL
COOP: Um...no...Loki...I don't think I want to know what you left in the shower!
Now...when Meowmmy finally got me to the vet's office, she said something evil. Something so evil that I don't think I will forgive her. Even after she pays for my tuition at Me-Yale when I go to college.
SHE SAID to the office manager at the vet's office, "FREE TO A GOOD HOME," when we walked in!!! Obviously, they knew she was kidding because they know what a Psycho Cat Meowm she is and that she really does love me above everything. And she kept me. She grounded me. But she kept me. But what's your take on THAT?
PHAROAH: How dast she joke about giving you away! You are a Royal Blue and one cool cat! You need to explain to her you are The Cat and no matter how you act or what you do, you are always right!
** background noises, throat clearing**
I am NOT trying to incite another riot Mamma!
COOP: Yeah, buddy. We are TWO KEWL KATS. Aren't we? However, I think the big question here is actually...would you do what you did to get grounded again? I certainly would! I would even do what you so selflessly did -- helpin' out a fur -- if it meant getting grounded. Loki?
PHAROAH: Would I do this again? By Bastet's Silvery Whiskers I would! I delight in inciting riots, er, I MEAN, coming to the aid of friends in need!
Plus I have all these leftover bugs from plagues I need to dispose of..Infesting a small home is a bit different from infesting a small country..
COOP: Loki, I know this was difficult for you to discuss, as it was for me. But it's so important to get the message out there that V-E-T visits are HORRIBLE and that GROUNDINGS are inhumane. I want to thank you again from the bottom of my furry, blue heart for agreeing to be here to discuss these tragic events.
PHAROAH: I am honored, my friend Coopurr, that you chose me to interview tonight. I am Blessed by your friendship. Thank you. Now I must go. Too much of My Royal Cat Self may cause sensory overload you know.
COOP: Catnip cookies purrpared by CHEF ROOSTER (exclusively for 360) for EVERY FUR in the audience! (*MAJOR SPONSOR PLUG*) I SAID...CATNIP COOKIES BY CHEF ROOSTER!!! (Aside: Is this the Coop or is it Oprah here?)
We'll be back again soon with a new episode of Coopurr 360. BASTET'S BLESSING TO EVERYFUR WHO GETS GROUNDED!!!!! Thank you, Loki! Good night, everyfur!
August 7th 2010 12:59 pm
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YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!! I AM FREEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!
Ummm...we had a little scuffle last Saturday. See what the Meowther wrote below.
Do you know what that Meowther of mine had the evil NERVE to say when we got to the vet's office? DO YOU KNOW?
She looked at Chris, the office manager who (of course!) LOVES me. (HELLO...I'm CUUUUUUUUTE.) And she said, "FREE TO A GOOD HOME..."
If that wasn't PAWFUL enough...
Then she goes and grounds me from Catster and HIJACKS MY DIARY!!!!!!!!!!! MY DIARY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Aside: Anyfur know how to change the password on this thing?)
Then...then...then...THEN...if my grounding wasn't bad enough...my loyal fur-riend and mentor, The Pharoah Loki, took to my defense and started a Free Coopurr Campaign. AND HIS MOM GROUNDED HIM, TOO!
Not to worry, my fur-riends. We have a furry, furry special episode of Coopurr 360 coming at you tomorrow. In the studio will be my fellow Blue, The Pharoah Loki. And we'll be disgussing this harrowing experience.
Right now, though, I want to thank everyfur who joined the FREE COOPURR campaign. Groundings stink! Ground your MEOWMMIES!
July 31st 2010 1:59 pm
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Coop's Mom here. And Coop was a very bad boy today.
You furs know...Coop is usually a little lovie. Sweet, affectionate, kissy little boy. He's everything and more than his Meowmmy ever wanted.
However, today...when it came time to get in the carrier and go to the Vet...Coopurr Anderson Hays Vanderbilt the Furst decided to turn on his "only child" inner-brat.
Yes, I know...you're all squirming and taking his side. And I know you don't believe us humans when we tell you that we only do it because we love you so much...but that's what it meant when we signed your adoption papers -- that we would love you and CARE for you at all costs...
...which INCLUDES taking you to the vet to make sure your paw is OK after you jumped in the bathroom sink and got your claw stuck in the faucet.
Today...Coop decided to take a three-hour hissy, clawing temper tantrum when I tried to get him in the carrier. Making us late. An hour late.
Don't worry -- he'll still get his extra treats for going. I do not take back my promises.
And he did get a nice long chin rub when we got home. Like everyone else...I do fall victim to his cuteness...and wow -- can he turn on the cutes! Especially after he's done something wrong.
My wounds -- literally and emotionally -- will heal. I'll buy a new shirt to replace the one he destroyed during today's fit. And he's already back to his little lovie-self.
But he's grounded from Catster for the next week.
Yeah...I know...I'm mean. But we do believe in Freedom of Speech, so please do post your FREE COOPURR comments below.
Sincerely -- and I mean SINCERELY...
July 25th 2010 5:21 pm
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Hi, Everyfur! Hope you guys had a pawesome weekend!
I've been tagged by my buddy Skippy. Please consider yourself tagged and play along in your diary...
1. Do you ever wake your parent up in the night?
Sometimes -- usually for a snuggle!
2. Do you ever tear up things?
I used to love to create what Meowm called "Toilet Paper Art" when I was a kitten. I moved on to bigger things after that -- "Paper Towel Art." But I've kinda given all that up now that I'm a big boy.
3. What is your favorite treat?
I LOVE Punce Tuna treats for many reasons, but I'm not allowed to have them very often. Mewom says they're bad for me. But I like them because she used to bring me Pounce when I was sick and she'd visit me in the shelter. And I like them because they're TUNA!
4. Can you fetch something when asked to do so?
Oh, yes, I can! And guess what my favorite toy is to fetch? RO!
5. Have you ever lived any place other than where you live now?
I was born on the streets of Brooklyn, and my foster mother found me and gave me a home. Then I went to the shelter to live while I recouperated with my eye. And then Meowm adopted me!
July 22nd 2010 6:52 pm
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The Meowm needs to get something straight here.
If she tosses out Ro, and I bring her back...THAT's a trick.
Yeah, I do that. Woot. Woot. Who CARES? So I'm gong for President of MENSA for Felines. Didn't Madonna do that? I am CERTAINLY smarter than MADONNA!
(Aside: My Uncle Greg likes to pick on Meowm about my MENSA meetings -- and she gets ALL defensive. It meowlarious!)
However, the Feline -- unlike the canine -- does not exist to please the Can Opener.
Don't get me wrong. There is love in this feline heart for the Meowm. She rescued me and nursed my eye. She feeds me. She nurtures me. She's even tried to clothe me. (NOT having THAT!) She even takes me to get my tootsies trimmed. And even though I hate her for it momentarily...it's so nice after it's all done.
And she is the ONLY person I will sit next to on the couch while sucking my thumb.
HOWEVER...there's a big difference between tricks and kisses. (Meowm said that sounds really bad, but I don't know what she means. Keep TYPING, Lady! I'm on a philosophical roll here!)
Tricks are soemthing that I do when I'm bored or feel the need to suck up or have some extra energy to exude or want more cookies.
Kisses are a WHOLE NOTHER THING.
Kisses are reserved for our quiet time in the morning...or when I'm sucking my thumb on the couch. Kisses are for when I'm lounging on the dining room floor, and Meowm passes through, and she bends down to rub my belly, and I'm so happy that I just lick her.
Yes, on many occasions, I've given a few kisses on command. Meowm puckers up...I pucker up...and we "ugga-mugga" right on the lips.
But don't you be EXPECTING one every time you smooch up and bend down.
Like...DUH...I *KNOW* what "Gimme a kiss..." means. But I ain't gonna give one every time. Just when I feel like it, OK?
Now...if you're reading this...go give your Meowmma a KISS.
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