Colette's Diary

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My Cat Can’t Spell

October 19th 2010 10:00 pm
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What is this? A blame game? I beg your pardon… I overheard Mom on the phone blaming me for all the typos and spelling mistakes she’s been making lately. Just ‘cause it’s my diary and they’re my posts. Hasn’t she heard of spell check?

Excuse me, Mom.

I have a diary, not a dairy—I’m afraid we really don’t have space for a cow and it would definitely be taking the concept of sisfur a tad too far.

Interminate? Does that mean something that doesn’t end, cannot be liquidated, annihilated or otherwise dispensed with?

Releae. Last I checked Lea, Leah, Leae, or any other form of this would not be able to be repeated in any shape or form.

Knawing. Now you’re beginning to sound like grandpaw with his thick Tscherman agzent. Yes, I know that “gnawing” and “knawing” both have silent initial consonants, but you ‘now’, your English stinks!

Likewise, the contraction for ‘you are’ is NOT ‘your’. Similarly, ‘they are’ is not ‘their’, etc., etc.

Now—that’s better--‘weave’ set the record straight.


Hsssss….

 

Dang. Who Put the Wall There!

September 25th 2010 1:35 pm
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Mom went out grocery shopping yesterday. While that’s nothing unusual, I was feeling in a particularly ebullient mood.

I always do this “hey Ma, great to see you” routine when she comes home. Mom always laughs.

First I check out the door as she’s coming in. We go through the same fun routine every time. She always asks me “who’s coming into your house, Colette?”

I check out the bags (there might be something choice in there for me.) Then I run all the way across the long living room to my scratching post. Skritch, skritch, skritch, skritch, skritch. And I go running back to Mom.

Mom dumped the bags and walked down the hallway to the bathroom. I beat her there and jumped in the tub. I waited for a bit and then I came exploding out of the tub.

Hey world, I’m heeeeere! Life is great! I go flying down the hallway, soaring on the wings of eagles, the early autumn wind blowing through my fur, turn the corner … and … WHAM!

Oouuuch!! Where’d that wall come from??? (Nobody moved it, Colette. Giggles.)

Head bonked…

 

Couple of Little Things

September 21st 2010 12:41 am
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Nothing terribly exciting this week—thank catness.

I have a couple of little things—that is if nobody makes a big deal out of it.

I’ve come to the realization that I’m a big girl. I tried out 2 sort of new things today: Mom’s lap and the brown blanket on the bed where Samsara and Marrakech usually sleep.

You know what? That fleece blanket is really comfortable! And you know what else? Those two little girls both fit on it when it’s folded. There are pieces of me spilling over onto the bed!

And Mom’s lap. I don’t know; I just can’t quite get the hang of that. I wanted attention while Mom was at the computer today, so she picked me up and stuck me in her lap. What are you supposed to do? There really isn’t enough room for me to stand so I just kept slipping around. Then there’s the part where my side is pressed against her face and she keeps breathing on my stomach?? I wanted the attention so I graciously purred and stuck it out for a few minutes.

Oh… the other thing I wanted to talk about: I don’t know who’s trying to get me in trouble, but it’s not gonna work. Somebody left poo balls outside my litter box. The dummies—don’t they know I don’t do poo balls? I do plops and ropes.

I’m also finally being accorded some of my rightful leadership status. Misha used to do that—show Samsara what to do. That’s my job now.

First thing every morning I’m in the bathroom for brushies, and Samsara shows up under me. Then, come around 2:00 in the afternoon, it used to be that Samsara would wake up from her nap and Marrakech would still be sleeping. Samsara didn’t know what to do with herself so she’d come out of the bedroom and make Mom crazy.

I’ve taken over that routine with a slight twist to it. Why take up space and just bellyache? Make it a productive endeavor, man! Treats! Ignore the full kibble bowls and pull the starving kitteh routine. Make a big enough pain in the butt out of yourself and you can get enny-thing your fuzzy little heart desires. I kick up the fuss and guess who shows up as my side-kick?

Headbonks…

 

Birthdays are nice!

September 18th 2010 12:04 am
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Hey, wow! Birthdays are nice!

I got lots of treats and hugs and kisses from Mom, and Mom sang happy birthday to me. I usually join in when she sings, but I was amazed: that song she sang had my name in it! Pawsome--a song in my honor!

Thanks everyone for your good wishes and presents:

Catster for the 25 Catster treats and one vote of 5 Paws
Monida for the yummy Ice Cream
Pipo & Minko for the yummy Ice Cream with the pawsome sunburst
Riley & Skippy Skipster for the pretty Pnk Ribbon
Nuk Anuk, Taag, Sweets & Gabby for the yummy Shrimpie
Steinem, Winnie, Charley Bleu Eyes & Tia Sydibil for the pretty Blue Ribbon
Simon & Reuben for the pretty Red Heart with the kitty giving me that birthday cupcake
Tutti, Junior Fluffkins, Tethys Fluffkins, Jake & Family for the pretty Pink Ribbon
Mea-Angel, Mikki, Milo, Mimu & Maui for the pretty Red Heart
Adam Dylan & Family for the fun Pirate Flag
BK & Teddy for the lovely Pink Ribbon
Sassy for the pretty Heart and the yummy Shrimpie
Oreo, Thomas, Brantley, Callie, Leo & Family for the pretty Heart
Elsa for the pretty Heart
Ozzie & Harriet for the pretty Heart
Jack & Gizmo for the pretty Heart
Anonymous for the pretty Heart
Teebo, Callie & Rose for the yummy Cupcake
Nikolai – Dreamboat #24 for the yummy Cupcake
Beepers, Ashlynne & Family for the yummy Cupcake
Mercy for the yummy Cupcake with the surprise Birthday Song in the middle
Kitty Pryde & Indiana for the yummy Cupcake
Muppet for the fabulous Champagne

How pawsome! You’ve all given me enough extra toys and treats to last me a whole year! Thank you everyone!

Headbonks...

 

FOOD-FIGHTS 101; ETHICS 101; CAT-FIGHT 101

September 11th 2010 8:42 am
[ Leave A Comment | 8 people already have ]

Mom always calls me her brainiac, so let me take advantage of that for a moment.

We are in the middle of the fray of a furry contentious issue here in Catsterland. I don’t need to point out what it is—by now you all know.

You may not like it, but both sides have equally valid points to make.

THE GOLDEN RULE: THOU SHALT NOT BITE THE HAND THAT FEEDS YOU.
And, we will say this to all sides in this cat fight.

At one point in time and hopefully never again, the food may have been no good, and perhaps the cats producing it acted unethically or unnecessarily slowly to fix the problem … We don’t mean to imply that we would always turn the other cheek… but let’s move on ….

Let’s look at that hand that feeds us.

We all live and play in a wonderful place called Catsterland. For the most part, we really like being here, if not it wouldn’t matter to us. Why get into a cat fight when you could just stake out new turf?

This is a great place to play with each other and to support each other in times of need. It’s a place for our pawrents to make new friends as well.

But it’s so much more than that. Where else could we go to for advice on all the everyday issues that come up? We have access to news, to each other, to veterinarians and sound medical and behavioral advice. There is a treasure trove of valuable things we get here that all the money in the world can’t buy. Or certainly, there is not any one of us that could buy all of this out of our own funding if we had to do it privately. Not even the Plus accounts.

In economic terms, that’s called a positive externality. That’s the stuff we get without having to pay for it directly. It kind of works like: part of my tax money goes into buying stuff like highways or street lights, or, perhaps, a policeman’s salary. By extension, another positive externality is the internet. We have paid no one directly, but because someone did pay, we all enjoy this amazing technology. But nothing is perfect. Not even a democracy.

In return for the protection of government and the enjoyment of things like information and fine parks to play in and the like, we are asked to sign on to (obey, if you will) a certain set of rules. That’s called a social contract. It is a contract by which we implicitly agree to give up some of our cat-given ‘inalienable’ rights for the common good of effuryone.

Let’s look at democracy for a moment. You always hear someone bellyache “it’s a free country”. What does that mean? That we can say and do anything we want without regard for who it hurts? Of course not!

Let’s take a look at our First Amendment rights:

Can I state my opinion—certainly. In what way?

May I yell fire in a crowded movie theatre and cause a stampede?

May I incite a crowd to riot?

May I bad-mouth someone in giving an employer reference causing him to never be employed again? He could rightly sue me for libel and character defamation.

May I blacklist that cat? That has overtones of the McCarthy era. Do we really want to go back there?

And, moving on to the Second Amendment: Do we have the right to bear arms without license?

ON THE OTHER HAND, OH GREAT PROVIDER

You have provided for us well; but the reason we are here in such force is because you have provided. And the reasons those who feed you—and by extension, feed us—are here is because we are here.


LET US ALL, PLEASE, CUR-TAIL, HOW FAR WE WANT TO TAKE THIS.

Headbonks….

Colette

 

Pet Health & Safety Widget from the FDA

September 10th 2010 8:49 am
[ Leave A Comment | 5 people already have ]

We don’t mean to be copycats. Nuk put up a Pet Health & Safety widget from the US Food & Drug Administration on his page earlier today. Clicking on the widget links you directly to the FDA web site and important information to keep us all well and safe.

We thought that this was so important that efurryone should have one of these widgets on their page, so we put one on my page too.

Here is the FDA address to get the code for the Widget so you can add it to your page:

http://www.fda.gov/AnimalVeterinary/ResourcesforYou /ucm192894.htm

Thank you, Nuk. This will go a long way towards keeping us all safe.


Purrs & Headbonks…

Colette

 

Gifts 101

September 1st 2010 5:37 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 8 people already have ]

In case you haven’t seen it yet. We’ve got a pretty new gift that we can give each other. It’s a heart with a kitty in it. (Who am I kidding--you haven't seen it yet! My page is covered in them!) But you might not know that it's for free just like the dogs have the big paws gifts.

A number of our friends started giving them to us so we wanted to reciprocate. For a smart lady Mom can sometimes be a real dork.

Okay. Mom’s way of gifting – the hard way. STUPID!

Click on your friend’s page and find out that they have a kazillion family members. Click back and forth to get to each member of the family and click on the gift button on each page. Click over to their doggy family member (even if you have a guest account for those of us with no dogs in the family) and find out that you can’t give either the kitty gift or the big paw ‘cause you need to have a family member on the web site. And sit there for half the afternoon making sure that each family member has our undivided attention.


COLETTE’S WAY OF GIFTING – LET THERE BE LIGHT and let you see it before the day is out.

Open two tabs in your browser.

The first tab is for your friend. The second tab is for the family page.

Open the second tab first and bring up the family page. Put your mouse cursor over the name of the first family member's name and right click the mouse button, select “Copy Shortcut”.

Click on the first browser tab. Place your mouse cursor over the address bar of your browser and right click the mouse button and select paste. Enter.

When your friend’s page comes up, click on the gift button. Select your gift as usual. Click on the Add/Edit Recipients button. Without closing the first tab, go back to the second tab and put your mouse cursor over the second family member name and right click the mouse, select “Copy Shortcut”.

Click the first tab again. In the Add/Edit box, there’s a space for you to paste the shortcut, “Add a Recipient Manually”. Place your mouse cursor over the box and right click on the mouse and select “paste”. The address of the family member will be pasted into that box. Click the Add button. You will see the picture of the newly added family member in the recipients’ box.

Keep going back and forth between tabs until you can see all of the family members you want to gift. Then click the “Continue” button and finish giving the gift the way you normally would. You can even leave a kitty gift on a doggy page that way.

Pop quiz tomorrow, Mom.

Headbonks…

 

New Food

August 31st 2010 10:55 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 7 people already have ]

It's been 3 days now that Mom started mixing Natural Balance Venison and Green Pea Formula into my wet food.

We have our paws crossed--there's some fish oil listed in the ingredients, but so far, so good. My poops started getting better before the new food and they've continued to get better.

I like the food so I'm hoping that I can keep eating it. Samsara likes it too :~{

I was a bit too slow eating tonight, but, hey. What am I going to do with her? I didn't want to bop her (and I really didn't). She kept shoving my head to the side so that I couldn't finish it by myself. My bowl got a bit too squeaky clean too quickly.

Headbonks...

 

She’s Such a Brat!!

August 29th 2010 8:43 am
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I’m ‘sposed to go first for my brushies every morning! (Oh? Says who?)
She’s such a brat! Samsara knows I’m gonna jump off the toilet seat when she stands under me. And then you’ve got the nerve to brush her first!!!!
Maaa…. Do something!

Pfft…

 

Vampire Lady Says I'm Normal

August 24th 2010 10:47 pm
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We got a call from the Vampire Lady (vet) this afternoon.

She says my thyroid levels came in at 2.1: completely normal. Yay.

The vampire lady was amazed when Mom reminded her that this was my first follow-up evaluation after sleep-away camp. The next one happens 2 months from now.

My poops are still no good. Mom is supposed to watch them for the next 2 days and if they don't get better I'm getting another round of Metronidazole to jump-start the healing. Mom and the vampire lady also discussed moving me on to Natural Balance Venison-Green Pea Formula.

Purring for good poops. I hate medicine!

Headbonks...

 
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(My Angel) Colette


 

Family Pets

Misha (In
Loving Memory)
(My Angel)
Marrakech
(my precious
angel) Samsara
Cappuccino
(1981-1998)
B.A.
(1984-1998)
Cassandra

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