My Diary

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Contagious

April 7th 2011 4:24 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 6 people already have ]

Sun, sun, sun and more sun. I have been warming my belly out in the sun again today, check out my tripod in the sun pics that mom took today. I think mom got my best side, MOL.
No visits from the aliens last night but a lot of bed hogging going on.
Well it looks like there are some new and VERY contagious feline Ailments out there, and it looks like a lot of catsters have got them.


COLLAPSIBLE LEGS

Symptoms: The affected cat places one side of its head on the ground as though cheek-marking the concrete, carpet, etc. After several such maneuvers, the legs on that side of the cat suddenly collapse, leaving the cat waggling its feet in the air.

Treatment: This involves placing the palm of one hand on the exposed belly and rubbing gently. There are side-effects though some feline sufferers attack the rubbing hand while others recover spontaneously, often after prolonged treatment. This condition is probably incurable and any cat which requires prolonged treatment after an attack will most likely suffer repeated attacks of collapsible legs throughout its lifetime.

SNUDGING

Symptoms: The affected cat repeatedly headbutts any available part of a readily available human and turns its head slightly so that the lips and cheek are rubbed against legs, arms, clothing, etc. This condition gets its name from a contraction of the phrase "soggy nudging." Snudging may well be a form of excessive scent-marking. A bad attack can result in soggy clothing.

Treatment: Give the sufferer lavish affection. Most attacks subside between 10 minutes to 1 hour after onset of symptoms. You may need to dry off snudged clothing or skin. Attacks recur frequently, usually when the most readily available human is engrossed in a TV program, book or telephone call.

Any one suffer from these ailments.
We might have to set up a support group.

 

Little known feline ailments

April 6th 2011 4:02 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 16 people already have ]

What a glorious day today. The sun has been shining and we have all been stretched out napping in sun beams.
Kringle won his competition, yay, well done Kringle.
There has been one damper on the day.....we have 2 little known feline ailments in the house and we thought we had better warn other people about them as there is no known cure.

BED-HOGGING

Symptoms: The cat spreads to take up all available free bed space at night. It then expands a bit more until any human occupants occupy the smallest possible area of bed. It may do this on top or underneath the covers or on the pillow. It is highly contagious -- any other cats on the bed will also develop symptoms of bed-hogging.

Treatment: The most obvious solution is to evict the cat from the bed. If this is morally unfeasible, train yourself not to give way as the cat expands. Buying a bigger bed is probably pointless as most affected cats can easily expand to fill standard, queen-sized and king-sized beds. Otherwise, simply train yourself to sleep while hanging precariously off the side of the bed. Attacks of bed-hogging have been known to last up to 23 hours (in one case a 3-day attack was noted by a cat-owner who was confined to bed with flu; the cat thoughtfully kept her company during this time).

GREEBLINGZ

Symptoms: Random dashes running helter-skelter through house in pursuit of unseen prey. Greeblingz are believed to be non-visible entities and some authorities have linked them to UFO sightings or feel that they may be diminutive other-dimensional beings. Cats suffering from greeblingz typically have wild-eyed expressions. There is a minor danger of greeblingz attaching themselves to humans; if a cat tackles such greeblingz, injury to humans may result. A very few cats are naturally immune.

Treatment: None known. Anti-epileptics are ineffective as the condition appears unrelated to other forms of seizure. Avoid getting in the way of a cat engaged in greebling hunting. Attacks usually subside spontaneously, perhaps as greeblingz return to their own dimension. These irritating creatures are not visible to human eyes, but no doubt the superior sight and hearing of cats enables them to see them.

Watch out for these ailments, they could happen to you!

 

Pondering Again

April 5th 2011 4:16 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 4 people already have ]

OH, BOY!
Today has been one of those days when I have had more fun using the litter tray.
The weather has been damp and cold, so I didn't want to go out side much, so all that was left to do was wash, sleep and slap the odd cat that woke me up, oh, and eat off course(that should have come first!).
Screaming at the can of food will not make it open itself.
I should not assume the patio door is open when I race outside to chase leaves.
If I put a live mouse in my food bowl, I should not expect it to stay there until I get hungry.
The rabbits like to sleep once in a while. I will not watch them constantly.
If I bite the cactus, it will bite back.
Television and computer screens do not exist to backlight my lovely tail.
I will not stand on the bathroom counter, stare down the hall, and growl at nothing right after my human has finished watching a scary film.( doesn't work with mom as they don't scare her)
No matter how dangly and attractive they are, my human's earrings are not cat toys.
If I play 'dead cat on the stairs' while people are trying to bring in groceries or laundry, one of these days it will really come true.
The canned cat food is already dead. I do not need to kill it by swatting bits of it all over the floor.
I am a carnivore. Potted plants are not meat.
I will never be able to walk on the ceiling, and staring up the wall and screaming at it will not bring it any closer.
The goldfish likes living in water and must be allowed to remain in its bowl.
If my human wants to share her sandwich with me, she will give me a piece. She will notice if I start eating it from the other end.
I cannot leap through closed windows to catch birds outside.
The large dog in the back yard has lived there for six years. I will not freak out every time I see it.
I am a neutered cat, not a peacock, and prancing around with my tail fluffed up will not make my parts grow back.
If I must give a present to my humans's overnight guests, my toy mouse is much more socially acceptable than a live beatle, even if it isn't as tasty.
One thing that really has me puzzled......as I have said before that mom and dad are vegetarians. Mom says they don't eat anything which has a face...............well I was thinking.........potatoes have eyes and corn have ears.......they eat those. Work that one out!
Dont forget its the last day to vote for Kringle.

 

Ponderings

April 4th 2011 4:24 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 5 people already have ]

At last a madness free night and a nice sunny day follows. Dad wasn't impressed when he was feeding us before he went to work....he slipped on a fur ball and he landed on the floor and our food went flying. He really should be more careful with our food. Mom was fast asleep and didn't hear him fall. Well, he should know by now to look where he is putting his feet.
I was out most of the day enjoying the sun and rolling around. I also found the cat nip that mom grows for us,hhmmmmm, I got so giddy on it, I love that stuff. After stuffing my head in the cat nip, I tried to catch some flies but I guess I had too much catnip because all I managed to catch was a twig that was on the floor.
After all that exercise it was time for a little more pondering.
Play and sleep in cardboard boxes.
Help with making the bed.
Help with making dinner.
Regard all neatly stacked piles of paper as provocation.
Don't cry over spilt milk - lap it up instead.
Make the world your scratching post.
Never sleep alone!
Become someone's friend for life.
Will my missing leg be waiting for me at rainbow bridge?
Wake your human at odd hours.
Use the cat box during an important formal dinner.(stand back and watch the faces)
Stand over an important piece of electronic equipment and feign a hairball attack. (good one to try when you want attention).
While your human is sleeping, lie on its face.

We would like to wish all our friends that have a birthday today/gotcha day A very happy day. There are so many of you again.
Dont forget to go and vote for Kringle and the blind cat rescue.

 

Mothers Day

April 3rd 2011 4:10 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 7 people already have ]

Today has been mothers day here in the UK.
After a wild night of madness again, we thought we would be extra good today. Mo mess and no sick from anyone.
The weather hasnt been too bad and I have been in and out like a yoyo, one minuite it was sunny and I was snoozing, next thing the clouds coverd the sun and I got chilly, so had to go in.
While snoozing I did some more thinking, Im getting into this thinking lark!
Always lick after meals!
Learn the difference between idleness and repose: one wastes time, the other luxuriates in it.
Long naps never go out of fashion
Never be discouraged by the words "No," "Stop That!" or "Bad Cat." (unless The Catfather is talking to you)
Never purr half-heartedly.
Don't worry about little things.
Don't worry about big things.
Miaow and the world Miaows with you, hiss and you hiss alone.
Keep everybody's secrets.
Why is the weather the same when you look out the front door and at the back door?
When you loose a whisker, does anyone hear it fall?
Why do humans love to kiss our bellys?
Wow, Im tired after all that, think I should better have a nap!

 

Quiet Day

April 2nd 2011 3:53 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 2 people already have ]

Another night of the madness that seemed to go on for hours, it was totaly crazy. I was getting grumpier and grumpier, I eventually found a place in a bed on the bedroom windowsill to sleep where no one would jump on me. I was still there this morning. These youngsters today.
A least today was quiet and the sun was out. I went outside for a while, then mom brought Cairo out but again he screamed like a baby still clinging on to mom, so she took in back in. I have never met such a mummies boy, it dosnt help when mom calls him ' her baby boy'!
I have been doing some thinking today, I dont do it often as it hurts my brain!
Should it be The Catfather or The Mogfather?
Does he have a posse of Catster Mogs?
Will he have a Catster Moll?
Will he make you an offer you cant refuse?
Will there be a baby face or scar face or even a fur face?
Will there be a trilogy?
Who will have the rights to the films?
Like I said its been a quiet day, I had to keep my self occupied!
Dont for get to vote for Kringle.
And most importantly, Dont for get its mothers day Tomorrow, so try and hold back those fur balls and be extra good and loving.

 

I aint coming out!

April 1st 2011 4:52 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 3 people already have ]

*peeps out from under the covers*
I aint coming out until tomorrow. Everyone seems to think they are commedians today.
This morning, there was I cosy and snoozing, when I felt something cold and wet near my face. I froze, I couldnt think what it could be, then I thought thought of the The Catfather. My breathing quickend, my stomach turned over, I slowly opened one eye but I couldnt focus and just as I was about to open the other eye, I felt cold air blow on my whiskers, I panicked......I jumped up to find...........Fox, looking up at me. 'Boo, made you jump! he said laughing. Well, I gave him a few choice words and slapped him one. He had stuck his nose in my face and blown on my whiskers to try and scare me. Seems he had been reading my diary.
I came down stairs, having a good growel at anyone who looked at me and asked to go out for some 'me' time, and guess what? it was raining, so that was short lived. I was not having a great day so far.
Dinner time, we all gathered in the kitchen and waited for mom to come and feed us, we waited and waited, but no sign. She eventually came in from the garage, where she had been cleaning out the rabbits.
She looked at us and said 'I dont know what all you lot are waiting for, there is no food for anyone'.
WHAT.......what does she mean theres no food!!!!!
She walked past us and went and sat down, like it was normal.
What on earth was going on? We were all stunned. She then came out to the kitchen and looked at us all and said 'APRIL FOOL'.
April fool....is that a new food? a new greeting? what is april fool?
Well, I was just about to go and phone the RSPCA or the police or the men in white coats as our mom had finally lost the plot, when I heard our food cupboard door open and mom shake the biscuit box. We all sighed in relief, what ever had possessed mom had left her. She tried to explain about April fools day, but none of us were listening as we were too busy munching.
Anyway, I had the last laugh......I ate my biscuits too quickly and promtly threw them up again, it didnt make mom laugh but it cheered me up as I got my own back.
I have spent the rest of the day hiding and I am not coming out until all this nonsense has stopped. Humans are weird.
We would like to say to all our friends that have birthdays or gotcha days today, WE HOPE YOU HAVE A GREAT DAY!. there are so many of you.
We send all our love and purrs to those that are in need.
*sticks head back under the covers*

 

Naughty Me.

March 31st 2011 4:09 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 5 people already have ]

I have been naughty and I think I am going to have to go into kittness protection!!!
I will whisper what I have done so that The catfather dosnt hear......*looks around*.....I made my ouchie bleed....*looks around again*....I didnt mean to, it just sort of, happened.
Mom was none too pleased when she came home and saw it and I had to have the cream treatment, yeuk. I sulked on the bed for a bit and while she wasnt looking I licked the cream off, whoops.
I then heard mom go to the back door, so I raced down stairs and out the door. Little did I know it was raining out side, so I had to act like it didnt bother me, so I didnt look stupid. I didnt stay out long and when I came in I was wet and I jumped up on to moms lap to dry off, which I thought was nice of me to share the moment.
Mom took Cairo out in the back garden yesturday, she was holding him and boy did he cry and hold on tight to mom, he is such a mummys boy.
I am shaking in my fur and I will be sleeping with one eye open and very close to mom tonight. I dont want to find a mouses head in my bed or wake up with a big, white, fluffy butt on me.
Dont forget to go and vote for Kringle.

 

The Catfather

March 30th 2011 4:05 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 8 people already have ]

Its offical.....we have created a monster!!!
Well, hes not a monster more of a large, white ball of fluff, but I would'nt say that to his face.
Blizzard Is The Catfather and he is watching.
Or according to Tink....the Hamfather (think Tink had a little too much NIP last night, hearing a large Hamster!!!).
After telling tales of the Catfather to the youngsters, we all had a quiet night, they didnt want to wake up with a mouses head next to them.
This morning.....What on earth happened to the weather? It was all wet outside and I dont do wet, so i was none too pleased. Needless to say, i didnt stay outside for long.
So, today I decided it would be a lazy day, I slept alot and got fox to wash my face and head for me.
Supper time we got CHICKEN, yay. We dont get chicken very often, mom and dad are veggies. I have no idea what that is about, how can they just eat veggies, yeuk. Mom gives us a treat of chicken from time to time, but can you believe it....Boo does not like chicken, what planet is he from? anyway that leaves more for us.
So with fat, full bellies we sleep.
Dont forget the Hamfather, oops, Catfather, is watching!!!!
Please, if you can, go and vote for Kringle
http://bissell.promo.eprize.com/mvpcontest/gallery? i d=135368
Hes the Official entrant cat for Blind Cat Rescue and Sanctuary in the Bissell MVP contest this week.
If you dont, The Catfather might come knocking!!
Do it for the cats.

 

Watch Out!!!!!

March 29th 2011 3:36 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 18 people already have ]

Watch out everycat, theres a BIG Guy in town!
*looks around slowly and whispers "his name is The Catfather", if you upset him, he will come round and sit on you. *starts shaking*
So if you find a mouses head in your bed, consider yourself warned by....* whispers again* The Catfather.
Thank you Tink for those words about the fog, they were lovely.
Today someone covered the sun, its been cloudy and a little wet, which I wasnt happy about and on top of that I had to let myself back in to the house via a small flappy thing in the door. What happened to door service? This place is going to the dogs.
My ouchie is getting better, mom hasnt put anything on it today, I dont want to sound a baby but, that stuff can sting at first and she usualy does it in front of everyone, so I have to be brave so they dont make fun of me. I also got something put into my food, apparently its to help keep my legs strong as I only have 3. It wasnt enough to put me of eating, I like my food too much.
Im off to tell the youngsters that if they dont behave they will get a visit from *whispers* The catfather.
Watch out all, you never know whos watching you!

 
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