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Toby's Diary

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Cosy time

December 7th 2016 10:08 pm
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On a dark and cold winter's evening I like to nestle up on my mum's arm and then Josie curls up on mum's lap and we are cosy as can be.

That was us last night. Then my mum said, "How come we always do this when I have to go out? When I'm home all evening and would like a snuggle you don't want to know." And she wriggled until we moved and off she went.

She should not go out on Cosy Time evenings. (Actually we can spot the signs so if she looks like she's going out we try and make her stay but if we have her for the evening we can sleep where we like!)


The Christmas tree attacked Josie

December 5th 2016 10:22 pm
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It was brilliant!

She was playing with our paper bag. We've mostly ripped it apart now but it still crinkles in a very satisfying way so we still like it. She was pouncing and leaping and flibbering with her paws when she and bag both slid into base of the tree.

The tree did not take this well and threw baubles at her. You never saw a cat so surprised. Even my mum laughed. (Josie was fine - the baubles are very light.)

I pretended to be concerned for that daft tortie's safety.

"Maybe if you put some presents under there then she wouldn't go so close. Just an idea."

I would like to say she has learned her lesson but I've seen her attack the bag right by the tree since so no, she hasn't.


We have our Christmas Tree up

December 4th 2016 10:11 am
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It is larger than last year as we have more space. I expect that will mean more presents.

I gave it a careful sniff.

"You're alright with it then?" asked my mum.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"You were scared of the little one when you were a small so I wasn't sure how a larger one would be," she said.

"I was a kitten. I bet Josie was scared of Christmas trees too when she was a kitten, " I said, hotly.

"No, she wasn't" said my mum and Josie chortled but turned into a cough when I glared at her.

Mum got the box of decorations. Her philosophy is that if you can still see the green of the tree then you have more decorating to do. People with taste have to avert their eyes when they visit but my mum likes it so.

Then mum took out the Advent Candle, looked at us, sighed, and put it back. "Maybe next year," she said.

I don't know why we aren't allowed real candles. They look like great fun. Oh - apparently that's why!

So the tree is ready and waiting for our gifts and I expect Sandy Claws and his Elves are busy packing them even as we speak. I've been pretty good this year so I'm quietly confident!


The things we do for love

November 26th 2016 10:54 pm
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I wanted to go out and my mum was in the kitchen so I went to my door and waited. In plain view. Patiently. For three, possibly four, seconds. Patiently waiting. In plain view.

Then I had to remind my mum I was there. She was chopping veggies for her supper. Veggies are not tasty but she likes them.

So she sighed, put the knife down and held my door open for me.

"If only there was a way you could do this by yourself," she said.

Don't tell her, but there is! I can push it with my head and get out all by myself whenever I like but she doesn't know that.

It's very important that she gets to perform these little tasks for us so she feels useful. So Josie and I pretend we need the door held open so she can do that.

The things we do for love.



November 24th 2016 9:04 am
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When my mum comes home late the very first thing she must do is to feed us. Obs. But she said she must take her shoes off first as her feets were sore.

"Why do you even wear shoes?"

"To keep my feet comfort..." She caught my eye. Clearly not to keep her feet comfortable.

"These shoes look very elegant," she tried.

I stretched out a paw to show her what an elegant foot really looks like.

She sighed.

So I still don't understand shoes. She has a pair of fuzzy slippers I quite like though.


Paper bag

November 22nd 2016 9:58 pm
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We aren't allowed to play with plastic bags but my mum bought a new pair of cowboy boots while she was away and they came in a large paper bag.

I'll admit I didn't see the potential right away. It wasn't until I saw Josie chasing toys that mum threw in it and it made this wonderful crinkly sound that I realised it was for me and not Josie after all.

I can go right in it and I've now torn a paw-sized hole in one corner that I can peek through and it's brilliant.

I could have played in it all night. I would have, only my selfish mum wanted to go to bed. I wandered the flat, mewing sadly, but she wouldn't come back, muttering stuff about sleep. She can be very selfish.


Josie is not cool

November 20th 2016 10:04 pm
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My mum went away for the weekend.

"Now Josie, what do we do when she comes back?"

Josie was confident that she knew the answer to that question. There was a lot about running around and being happy.

"no, no, no! We've been through this. Don't be all crazy. Be cool!"

Did she listen? Did she heck! When my mum was home and unpacking Josie ran around like a cray thing and somehow, to my horror, I found myself drawn in. So we both ran around and mum said she had missed us and I am happy she's back but she shouldn't go away.

And we have to work on the whole cool thing!


Mum gone mad

November 18th 2016 1:19 am
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I hate to have to break it to you as I know some of you are fond of her but she's been acting very oddly and not just her normal dancing round the kitchen crazy oddly.

It started yesterday when she came home from work and there was a light on our cat flap.

"Must need new batteries," she said and new batteries it had.

But the light stayed on. And when I went out I couldn't get back in again. It was borked.

"Now you have to stay home for ever and let us in and out," I said, so it wasn't all bad.

But this morning she rang them and talked to the lady and got it fixed but I still couldn't get in. I was scrabbling away and she was calling me like she didn't know how to hold it for me.

She was about the phone the nice lady at Sureflap again when she had a thought.

"I think it's forgotten you. We need to re-set it."

One does not "forget" a cat like me. Even if one is a catflap.

But nothing would settle her until we had both been thrown out in the cold and then called back in. Twice. Once to re-set and once to check it worked. This is no way to spend a morning I can tell you. My idea of her staying home for ever was much better!


Winter is coming

November 13th 2016 10:22 pm
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We know this because every time my mum sits down Josie scrambles on to her warm lap. Sometimes my mum is happy and sometimes she says "Oh Josie. I have to go in a minute" and Josie squiggles herself down in the manner of a cat that cannot be disturbed!

But they both like the times when my mum has her cup of tea to hand and nowhere to go and they are all cosy and snuggly.

I do not do laps but I like to be close by for head-rubs.


Josie went to the vet

November 12th 2016 7:56 am
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She was furious as it was really my turn. She went a month or so ago but apparently going when you're not well doesn't mean that you don't have a check-up.

She was specially worried as last time the vet said she might need her teeth operated on again. So I could hear her meowing all the way there even though I was still at home.

Anyway I gather all went well. Not only has Josie gained 400g (she lost weight before) but her teeth were deemed exceptionally good for a nine year old cat. So no operation. They were both very happy when they came home and my mum has bought Josie some treats to celebrate.

I am very happy for Josie too so will join in the celebration!

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