I Used Up My Ninth Life

Last night I expired; during the day I would cry out periodically from my place behind the big guy's chair, and then be silent. I heard Mom saying she'd rather have me die at home than take me to that place where they give you a lethal injection.

He gave me a dose of the drops, and then I felt better. I don't want to cry anymore.

So sick

Last week the big guy finally took me to the doctor. I didn't want to go, but I couldn't put up much of a fight getting in the bag.

The doctor was gentle; he looked in my mouth and saw that my teeth were all crusty, and then saw a lump on my tongue. Maybe they'll figure out why I'm having trouble eating (it hurts!) The doctor said I weighed 15 pounds. He stuck me with a needle and I fell asleep...

Mom is spending more time on the floor with me stroking me and telling me I'm a "good kitty"; I purr, but it feels rough and my breath whistles in my nose. It's funny how they change; not long ago, she was shooing me out of her room whenever I pooped there.

But she gets me fresh water when my water gets cloudy; I'm drinking a lot of water now. I especially like to lean over the sink and get it from a bowl in the sink, so she makes sure it's fresh.

The doctor said the lump wasn't a "squamous carcinoma" (whatever that is), but it is a carcinoma (whatever that is.) Mom is sad; she keeps saying she didn't expect this and how can I have cancer and she just wants to make me comfortable - but then they try to squirt some awful-tasting stuff in my mouth and I get it all over my front. I'm a mess; I can't stop drooling and my front is all sticky.

I like it when she strokes me, though; I purr. And I still sit on Dad's knee when he watches TV.