Toby's Diary

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August 11th 2013 10:39 pm
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Mum came home all tired from her day at the stables on Friday - but happy. She said everyone was very lovely and they got to pat the horses. They even got to give them treats.

"Not my little fish?" I said, with an anxious glance at the drawer where they live.

Mum laughed. "Horses don't like kitty treats. They had special horse ones, green with herbs that horses like in them."

That got me thinking.

"Do you think they would like to swap one of their horses for a cat? They could have Josie and I could have a flat-mate who doesn't eat my treats."

But mum said no. Apparently I haven't grasped just how much bigger horses are than cats and one wouldn't fit here.

"Besides they have a cat, a handsome black one," she said.

Ah yes, they would need a cat to organise everything I suppose.

"And," she added, "They aren't your treats. I buy them for you to share with Josie."

"I do always get mine first so they must be mine," I said.

"That's because otherwise Josie wouldn't be able to eat hers, you would steal them. She has better manners," said my mum but I don't think that's true.

 

Mum's odd day

August 8th 2013 10:31 pm
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She started getting things together this morning that don't look like normal worky things. I commented on this and she says it's because she isn't having a normal worky day.

"I'm volunteering. I'm off to help out at the stables. Remember I told you my company chose to support a Riding for the Disabled place this year?"

I do. I remember a horse came to see them. I remember mum told me an interesting thing about horses.

"So you know that horses are bigger than cats. What else do you know?" I am always keen to learn stuff.

There was a pause.

"Yup, definitely much bigger than cats."

"How can you help? You know nothing about horses," I said

"Oh I'm not doing anything with the horses. We're clearing hedges," she replied.

I looked out of the window. How to put this?

"You don't know anything about hedges either. Look at the jungle out there." I favour the direct approach.

She looked a little downcast. "I'm hoping they'll tell me what to do."

I hope they don't tell her too much. I love my jungle garden.

 

Being a good cat

August 7th 2013 10:37 pm
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Sometimes I am. My mum was tired last night so when she called me indoors I ran straight over and in I jumped the door. She looked surprised.

"Who are you and what have you done with Toby?" she asked.

"Very funny," I sighed. "Where's supper?"

I had my supper and we all trotted off to bed. A little snuggle so she would have sweet dreams and then I settled myself on the window sill to sleep. It's still too hot for my chair although it's much cooler than it was.

Mum's all perky this morning on account of sleeping so well and I'm nestled beside her - the perfect cat.

(Don't worry - I'm just lulling her into a false sense of security! I'll find new ways to tease her.)

 

A good game

August 6th 2013 10:34 pm
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Try this one when your mum is in bed asleep and you aren't sleepy yet.

I walked over my mum then wondered if I could remember exactly where I put my paws and if I could repeat the walk. I jumped back. Hm. One paw there on her arm, one paw here on her tummy. Over I went. Was that right? I'm not sure. Jump back and try again. Paw here, paw there and so on....

Until my mum said, "Cut it out Toby". I knew she wasn't really asleep, only pretending and I needed my head rubbing.

I did let her get some sleep later but then Josie woke her. Josie is still being all happy mum is home again so wanted to snuggle and I could hear her purr. Apparently snuggling gets headrubs while walking on doesn't. Interesting.

I wondered what result a gentle tap would get so tested that one later.

Mum is grumpy this morning. She says she would like to know what it is to sleep a whle night without cats waking her. Just one more dream for her to aspire to!

 

Getting my own back

August 5th 2013 10:32 pm
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My Mum thinks I have forgiven her for going away and not buying me a bird table but I haven't. Here is how I have been getting my vengeance.

Yesterday it rained. Not just a little bit, a lottle bit. It poured and poured. I went out in it and got soaked right through and then came back. I pretended to love my mum, rubbing my sodden fur against her so she got wet and muddy too.

"Toby - you are saturated," she said and it was true, one stroke and water was everywhere. It took a while to get dry but it will take her longer to get the mud off everything I rubbed against so totally worth it.

Then at bed time I jumped in the middle of mum's bed and made myself all cosy so she couldn't get in herself.

Seh rubbed my head. "What's got into you, crazy cat?" she asked. "Abandonment and no bird table," I thought but I just purred like a cat who cannot be moved.

I am pleased with yesterday's plans. Now I just need to think of some more...

 

Mum's friends

August 4th 2013 10:38 pm
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I did not like my weekend as my mum went away and abandoned us. When she came back on Sunday Josie went all loopy and happy but I was cool. Out I went.

Later I came in and sat beside her but I didn't look at her and flicked my tail so she would know she had displeased me.

She said she had gone back to Norfolk for the annual school reunion picnic. I don't know most of her old school friends so when she got her camera out to download their pictures I was interested to see what they looked like.

"That one's a dog," I was surprised. I had more imagined they would be people.

"Some of them brought their dogs," explained my mum, scanning to the next photo.

"That one's a dog too," I couldn't help but notice.

"They were lovely dogs. I do have some of people," she said.

Indeed she did - although always with the dogs. Another photo.

"There's you - with the dogs."

"I hadn't realised I had taken quite so many of the dogs," she admitted.

Then the last one really got my attention for it was a cat. His people have made him a very splendid elevated platform with a little roof to sleep in and there he was, all content.

"I want one of those," I said.

"It's not a cat place. It's a bird table," she said.

"Even better. I want one more. I like birds."

But apparently we're not getting one.

I am still being cool with my mum, abandoned and no bird table. Josie is still being all happy to see mum. No style, that cat!

 

I am REALLY not coming in

August 1st 2013 10:35 pm
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Having been a bit cooler yesterday was all hot again. My mum said it was a thing called the Spanish plume, headed straight up from the Mediterranean.

"That doesn't sound like Laura Belle sent it," I commented. There must be some kind Spanish cats who thought I might like it and I did.

And there was no way I was coming in. Mum tried the calling thing. I ignored her. She tried the temptingly scented food. I knew I would get that later. She tried the Dreamies but I was wise to that one. Even they would not take me from my pleasingly warm evening filled with things to chase to an over-hot flat filled with Josie.

So mum vanished. I heard going to bed sounds and laughed. Cracked it! I'm out for the night. What adventures I shall have! What creatures I shall meet!

What creatures shall I meet? As my Catster friends have pointed out, not all of them are prey and not all of them are well-disposed to small black cats.

"Mum," I called, scrabbling at the door, "Let me in." No sign of her then sweet relief there she was.

"I thought maybe you had gone to bed," I said as I poured myself through the door.

"I couldn't sleep if I didn't know you were safe," she replied. "I knew you would come in."

The plume has gone today as suddenly as it arrived. Maybe the Spanish cats missed it.

 

Mums can be annoying

July 31st 2013 10:38 pm
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The first thing my mum did was come home late yesterday. I was waiting at the window for her. When I did see her she had lots of bags. Turns out it was payday and she had been shopping. We are all stocked up on cat food and kitty litter.

"And treats?" I asked.

Mum looked at me. "Have you been a good boy?"

"Perfect," - why does she even bother asking?

"Then yes, I do have some treats. Including some new fishy ones."

So I forgave the whole late thing (although I haven't had any of the new treats yet.)

But then she was watching TV and a programme about Guide Dogs. She was all "look at the cute puppies" and "aren't those dogs well-trained?" She always gets ideas after watching programmes about dogs. Josie and I are cats and will never be trainable.

I am a sort of Guide Cat of course. I shepherd her into the kitchen when my tummy is empty and out of bed when I want to play. They should do a programme about all the valuable work cats do in making sure they get the best possible care. That's what she should be watching.

 

Josie tried to eat mum

July 30th 2013 10:30 pm
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It's true. That tortie has gone crazy!

It started very early when I was curled up on my chair and mum was in her bed and we were both sound asleep. Josie woke up and had a heart full of mischief.

She started chasing the lights of a car driving past which is a personal obsession of hers. Then she ran out of the room really fast. Then she ran back in. Then she ran out. Then she ran back in again. Up on the chest of drawers - and then it happened.

My mum is sleeping under only a sheet at the moment and her legs were easy to see. Josie dive-bombed off the drawers and grabbed my mum's left leg and bit her.

I would say that woke my mum up but I think all the running around had done that. It did make her pretty lively too though.

"Josie! What was that?"

Josie sniggered and darted off. Not the actions of a nice cat. Mum got up and saw that our biscuit bowl was empty so she fed us which was a bit of a result really as it wasn't properly breakfast time.

Now it is Josie is all tired and has gone back to bed. Mum says she didn't bite hard but it was a surprise. I am off hunting. Josie says she is the mightiest hunter as she got to bite her prey but mum's legs are hardly a difficult target.

 

I an NOT coming in!

July 29th 2013 10:34 pm
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Yesterday evening it rained and it thundered and it lightningend.

"I think I'll stay home this evening," I said to my mum as I settled down on my favourite bed.

"Good choice," she said. "I'm thinking I should too."

But she loves to dance so off she went to class.

By the time she got back the rain had stopped and I was ready to go out. I slipped past her when she opened the front door on her return.

"Toby!" she called.

But I was gone. She came out to catch me so I slithered over the gate and into the back garden. Tee hee!

A little while later I heard her at our special cat door. She pushed it open and called through it, in her extra excited, something good is about to happen voice. "Toby, come here Toby."

I ran quickly across the garden to find out what it was, right up to the door and then I realised. There was no special thing. It was a trick.

"I am NOT coming in," I said and walked out of arm's reach.

"Grr," she said and the flap closed.

It opened moments later to an intriguing rustling sound,

"Come and see what I've got" she called.

I went close enough to sniff. Mmmm - whitefish and shrimp if I mistake me not- and my best brand of cat food. I was tempted but, "I am NOT coming in."

The door closed.

Then a few moments later it opened. "How about this?"

I got closer and sniffed. Could it be?..It was. Dreamies. I love Dreamies. I can't get enough of them. Curses! I couldn't help myself. I had to go in. I slid through the door and mum had it closed and locked quick smart while I ate my Dreamies. I was coming in after all but it was so worth it.

Anyway I don't think my mum could sleep if I wasn't in the room to keep an eye on her.

 
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