Some of you may remember when we introduced you to the “angry snuggle” last year. You know the move: You, of course, want a quality cuddle with your cat, so you scoop him up for a snuggle session. Then, out of nowhere, things get ugly and kitty wants no more of that lovey-dovey business. What? Cats’ affections can turn on a dime? Color me shocked!
In the first post, we provided a handy chart so you can easily identify an angry snuggle before it escalates into a full-blown claws-and-fangs fest. Here’s a quick summary:
- A: Angry thoughts — these thought waves are angry like a tsunami.
- B: Airplane ears — when they’ve settled into the 90-degree position, the cat is ready for takeoff.
- C: Stink eye — the foulness rivals the stink expelled from the cat’s other end.
- D: Landing-gear legs — landing-gear legs are fully engaged during the height of the angry snuggle.
- E: Log body — it’s the stiff, full-body stance of retaliation, not unlike a mid-tantrum toddler or a resistant protester being carried off by the cops.
Since we first posted about angry snuggle-awareness, I’ve asked my friends to submit their own funny cat photos of their documented snuggles-gone-south. But first, my friend Katy dug up a doozy of me attempting to love on Cosmo, who was having none of it.
Exhibit A: Me and Cosmo
Wow. The cranky writing’s on the wall in this pic. He’s totally nailed the airplane ears, the landing-gear legs, and the log body. Plus the thoughts are obviously full of irritation. And the stink eye? I can smell that funk from here. I mean, look at me. I wouldn’t want me to snuggle me either. I’d angry snuggle my own self.
Exhibit B: Charlene and Rintoo
My friend Tisha sent me this photo of her mother-in-law, Charlene, holding her big orange boy, Rintoo. Family gatherings are hotbeds of angry snuggles. Everyone’s holding a camera and photos with cute kitties are a must. After all, cats are a part of our families, and we want to include them in our special memories. Cats, however, would just rather steer clear of photos ops with handsy relatives, and that’s one of the reasons they hide under beds when friends and family come calling.
This photo demonstrates the very beginning of an angry snuggle. The signs are subtle but obvious to the seasoned student of cat snuggling. Rintoo won’t even look at the camera. The thoughts are getting angrier by the moment, and soon the landing-gear legs and log body will take over, creating that holiday memory everyone will recall for years to come: “Remember that time Rintoo rabbit kicked Charlene’s face off?” Nobody wants that.
Exhibit C: Emily and Reeses
This cute little girl is my husband’s cousin’s daughter, Emily. Got that? She’s posing pretty with their cat, Reeses. There’s no shortage of photos of Reeses online, friends. He even has his own Facebook page. Reeses is no stranger to the flash of the camera, but that doesn’t make him immune to an occasional angry snuggle … and his patience is waning in this photo. The stink eye is getting smellier by the moment, and I have a feeling the ears will be completely flat mere seconds after the shutter snaps.
We can’t see his mouth or any other parts of his body, but really, do we need to? I think we’ve seen enough evidence. Even adorable young girls like Emily become victims of an angry snuggle. Feline fury doesn’t know anything about age or cuteness. And it doesn’t really care, either.
Exhibit D: Marissa and Momo
Ohh, this has already taken a turn for the cantankerous. Although there’s no absolute evidence of log body, we can be fairly certain of its loggy presence. In fact, there’s a logarithm to prove that, but there’s no time to go into that now — you just have to trust me.
The airplane ears are ready to take off, and the eyes have undoubtedly infiltrated the room like a giant stink bomb. Notice how the camera captures Marissa’s sudden surprise and confusion surrounding a perfectly cuddly photo gone completely wrong in a matter of seconds? Angry snuggles can escalate just that quickly, people. We’ve seen enough, thank you.
Do you have any angry snuggle photos of your cat? Share them in the comments!
Read more posts by Angie Bailey: