 Purred: Wed Dec 13, '06 3:49pm PST |
 | |  | | RESEARCH UPDATE!!!!!
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VISHUS DEER ALERT for GOSHEN NY, 5:35 PM
Gordy has NOT been wearing the "fake" antlers for over a day now and a short time ago, Mom spotted a single vishus deer in the now harvested corn field looking across our yard and up at our house! The vishus deer ran off when it saw her, but ran AWAY from the area where the skeletal vishus deer are! Another interesting note- it did NOT try to hypnotize her with it's lazer beam eyes- not for one second.
This new sighting although terrifying, is VERY encouraging!
1) Gordy wears fake vishus deer antlers for a period of time, NO vishus deer sightings at all! Gordy takes antlers off, vishus deer return shortly after. There's GOT to be something there!
2) The vishus deer used to come up into the yard right next to the house. Since skeletal vishus deer have been out on the neighbors lawn, NO vishus deer have been seen ON the property. Again, something to that.
More studies to follow and I will keep you all posted...
Now, the terrifying news!
There is a species of vishus deer that live and breed in the tropics of Florida that many of you kitties may not know about. They are called VISHUS KEY DEER and I believe they are breeding with homeless, mentally captive KITTIES to reduce their sizes and to make their thinking capacities more like ours to better understand and hunt us down! The largest of these VKS stand about 28 inches at the shoulder. They inhabiat the Florida Keys and like alligators, have that taste for blood! Fortunately for us, this species of vishus deer is endangered and their numbers are few BUT humans are trying to SAVE them!!!! Brave kitties can see a *full grown* Skewer VKD here:
http://skydiary.com/gallery/chase2001/081001keydeerjim.jpg
Now, My ONLY reason for theorizing that the vishus deer may be breeding with kitties is that unlike the HEMMINGWAY cats, there are HUNDREDS of wild kitties living in the keys who haven't any humans to love and care for them. They have fallen victim many times to the vishus deer and have become tired of being food, therefore striking a reluctant alliance with the vishus deer to develop a breeding program that births TINY vishus deer with kitty thinking. It's a terrible plan because the poor kitties involved will soon learn that they can NOT trust a vishus deer under any circumstances and become the next meal once they have perfected the VKD size and mind.
Although I live in NY, I will do my best to learn more about the VKD in Florida. I have put out MANY requests for information to any kitty who has fallen victim to or has been terrifyied by a VKD.
To all my kitty friends, STAY SAFE, if you DO see a vishus deer, DO NOT try to watch it as you CAN be hypnotized into serving yourself up as dinner! Yes, it may be thrilling to see one, but be warned, these are VISHUS KILLERS that want nothing more than a young, juicy, tender kitty for dinner!
Lastly, do NOT try any of my experiments on your own! I am a middle-aged dried-up cranky kitty with lots of TOUGH meat on my bones. There's NOTHING young, tender or juicy about me! The odds are *slightly* in my favor.Edited by author Wed Dec 13, '06 3:54pm PST
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