Ragdoll - Extremely Independent, scared or just weird?

This is a place to gain some understanding of cat behavior and to assist people in training their cats and dealing with common behavior problems, regardless of the method(s) used. Keep in mind that you may be receiving advice from other cat owners and lovers...not professionals. If you have a major problem, always seek the advice of a trainer or behaviorist!


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Purred: Wed Jul 30, '14 12:37pm PST 
I need help with my 7 month old male Ragdoll. We've had other cats before but none were ever like this guy. Also,he's our first "breeder cat".

Starting at about 4 months old he became increasingly distant. We had him neutered at 5 months because he was starting to get a little aggressive, and we wanted to make sure he didn't start marking. We thought by fixing him he might also revert back to his old ways 6 weeks or so after the surgery, but he hasn't.

He used to ALWAYS sit by me on the couch and sometimes in my lap. Now, he will rarely get in either of our laps - only to get his treat and leave. He gets extremely annoyed at more than a stroke or two of petting and will get up and move a few feet or more away. He still follows me a lot, he solicit purrs and "flops down" (the ragdoll flop) only when I'm in the kitchen and he knows he's getting food. He will sometimes solicit purr when we approach him but then will quickly move out of reach after a stroke of petting. He doesn't like contact much AT ALL anymore. He used to sleep by our heads at night, but now prefers the cold, wood floor - its always very cool in our house, so it's not that he's hot, but I understand cat regularly change sleeping spots. We give him his space and never hold him beyond his will. We've tried showering him with lots of attention and playing hard to get, pretending like we are uninterested but neither method worked on to get him to open up.

We've never abused him or mistreated him and only shown him love and affection. I had to rebuild my trust with him a couple of times when he was younger and got some poo on him and needed to be bathed, but he seemed to be over it after a day and would sit by me before he "changed". I play with him multiple times a day, every day for 10 or 15 minutes a session. It almost seems like he's paranoid or confused, but I couldn't tell you why. We have a dog, and they LOVE to play together and get along like best buds. I'm home all day, so he isn't lonely or depressed.

I've heard breeder cats may not always be socialized very well, but we did our homework and they were very highly regarded, and he was a great kitten for the first month. Can anyone offer any tips or advice? Thoughts or ideas? Could this just be the "teenage phase"? Four months seemed too early for that, to me. Is he just EXTREMELY independent? I really hope he isn't going to be THIS independent because at this point he's just turning into an expensive mouth to feed and not much more. I really love him, I'm just very confused and frustrated by his change in temperament.


Leave me alone!
Purred: Wed Jul 30, '14 10:03pm PST 
I have pure breed Birmans. Brownie was pet quality & was 4 months old when he came to our house. Cookie & Candie were show cats. They had 2 litters with only a single offspring from each. So they were not as socialized as Brownie when they came to our house. Cookie (3 yrs. old then) settled in first and made a smooth transition after three months. Candie joined us at the age of 4 & is still a problem child. It took her 1.5 yrs. to warm up to me. She loved everyone in the house but me. (I was Cookie's person per Cookie.) And only this week she started to follow me & talk to me. She almost never talks. I just do not think is a breeder thing unless he was there for years.

But we did have a Birman, Honey that changed after she was fixed. She marked her territories like a boy after the operation. Only stopped when she around 10. She would stand and pee after the operation.

I'm hoping it is just the summer heat. My cats are avoid us more in the summer. All that long fur & now they are laying on the floor to get their bellies cool. Even when we have the air on, they still do not want to be on us. I can not say if you have the same weather as me in StL. But even the Siameses were not lap cats in summer when we had them.

No food changes... No litter changes... And the water bowl is the same... Can you get him to purr or knead on you? Was he doing this before the heat? Is grooming time a happy time? My cats love me during grooming time unless I find a knot. Does he licked you up? I call them kisses.

I going to have to think about it a bit more.