Stress-head Bunty

Orkney said I could write a diary entry if Mummy would help me, so I am going write about what happened to me yesterday.
Mummy took me to the vet a few weeks ago because she says I have behavioural issues. I'm not sure what she means but apparently she wasn't too pleased when I peed in her handbag - and on her desk - and the kitchen bench - and her clothes - and the stovetop - and sundry plastic bags. The vet said I was stressed so Mummy got some medicine to calm the stress-induced inflammation in my bladder, and some Feliway spray to make me feel better about life in general. She also captured the tomcat that was stalking us (see Orkney's diary for details).
Now I can't seem to de-stress so yesterday she bundled me into the CAGE (I hate the cage) and took me for a REALLY long car ride. We went to another vet surgery and I was examined. I cringed the whole time and tried to make myself as flat as possible. (Mummy said that was a bad idea as it makes me look even fatter than I already am.)
The vet put some stuff in my mouth. I think she said it was called Bark Flowers. I am a cat, they ought to be Meow Flowers surely? Anyway it was quite nice. But then she stuck all these needles in me so I looked like a pincushion, and I had to keep them in for a long time. But I was good and didn't struggle. Then we went to Mummy's parents' home and I met their cat Lily who ignored me. Mummy then took me through the McDonald's drive-through as a treat. I didn't like it much.
I'm very happy to be home but Mummy keeps trying to creep up on me with the Bark Flowers. I foil her though and run away, haha.

Bad, Bad Bunty

I foiled Mummy's plans yesterday. I was snoozing on the bed when I heard a furtive rattle - the kind of rattle when Mummy opens the lid of the cat cage in the next room. When she came back I was nowhere to be seen. Hehehe! She found me hiding under the futon. She knows it's pointless trying to crawl under there to catch me.
Next thing I heard a good kind of rattle, the rattle of cat crunchies going into the food bowl - but I resisted! I stayed under the futon and let the others eat them all.
Mummy then made a phone call. "Hello, is that the vet surgery? I'm afraid Bunty won't be coming in for her acupuncture today." Yessss! Victory!
Just to make sure Mummy understands my position, I peed on her dry cleaning bag this morning. She doesn't seem impressed.

Tagged!

Our friend Puddles from Texas has tagged all of us to tell 5 facts about ourselves. So here goes:

1. I was the first-born in the litter and I did come out backwards. Mummy says I've been a bit backward ever since.
2. I'm quite timid and a bit of a stress-head.
3. I have a fetish about banging the cupboard doors in the kitchen. It drives Mummy insane.
4. I can't wait for bed time so I can get the best spot on Mummy's bed.
5. I'm not very good at respecting the others' personal space. Guess that's why they bash me up so much!

Passing on to Orkney to tag 5 more kitties for us.

Cold Turkey

It's finally happened - we've run out of Feliway and Mummy hasn't got any money to buy any more because she hasn't worked for the last few weeks. Oh no - does this mean Orkney and Zephyr are gonna pick on me? I'll try my hardest not to pee in bad places, but if they upset me I can't be held responsible for my actions!
Maybe Mummy will put extra Meow Flowers in the drinking water. Or maybe I'll just hide behind Arrow.

One Better Than Arrow

Arrow thinks she's so good because she caught a rat. Well, I went out hunting the other night, and I got Mummy a special present. I was waiting on the doorstep with it the next morning, looking forward to hearing Mummy's cries of delight when she opened the door to find a big dead rabbit waiting there for her. Actually, what she said sounded something like "Ewwww", but I could have been mistaken.

Unfairly maligned?

I'd just like to refute my sisfur Arrow's assertion in her diary that I am a bit of a wet sock. I'm a very brave cat, it's just that bad things happen around me...on Saturday Mummy's friend Craig came over with the Whipper Snipper and lopped all the weeds. Mummy couldn't understand why I wasn't around for a few hours. Craig stayed for a while and gave my fat sister Zephyr a tummy rub but he had to go without seeing me and then Mummy went up the shops. When she came home she was greeted by me meowing pitifully from the roof - and a hot tin roof it was too. I'd bolted up there when Craig started the Whipper Snipper and I couldn't work out how to get down again. However the rustling of shopping bags resulted, as Mummy says, in a temporary boost to my IQ and I magically reappeared on the ground!
Then yesterday she accidentally shut the door on my tail. I yelped and ran into hiding and wouldn't come out even for dinner. Again Mummy knew just what to do - get the chopping board out and cut up chicken for her dinner. I magically reappeared again!
Today was even worse - the man from next door AND his foreman AND the pest control guy were in and out all day. (We've had flying ants in the wall and they were grossing Mummy out.) By the time Mummy came home I was again nowhere to be found - but once more, food worked its marvellous spell and after the bowls had been down for half an hour - ping! Reappearance of the Buntster!
See how brave I am?

Buntster the Huntster!

As you may know, we are having a bit of a rodent plague around here lately due to the dry weather, and it's been Mouse Parties nearly every night. Zephyr has been carrying on like a pork chop about how she is the best hunter because she brought home a rat on Australia Day.
Mummy has wondered the last couple of nights what I have been doing. Well, she opened the door this morning and wondered no more! There on the doorstep was Moi, proudly displaying the biggest, meanest looking rat you ever did see! (I mean, it was dead, but it looked mean even in rigor mortis.)
Mummy said "Bleeeagggghh!" which I think is human talk for "Bunty, you are a superstar, and a pearl without price, and I will treasure this dead rat forever."
It was a super-size rat, a gargantuan rat; it was King Rat, a veritable Behemoth of Rats. It made Zephyr's piddly little offering look like a baby fieldmouse.
Mummy reverently picked it up, put it in a ceremonial bag and took it up to the big green plastic sarcophagus for sacrificial victims that she keeps near the gate. She had one arm across her stomach and the other arm across her mouth all the way, which I know in humans is a sign of great emotion.
I feel deeply honoured to have been able to give my Mummy this gift.

There's something about Bunty....

For some days now Mummy has been puzzled that I sometimes come in with an oily substance in the fur on top of my head. She doesn't know where I've picked it up and she doesn't know what it is. It doesn't seem to be toxic in any way and doesn't smell of anything. The other night I came in with so much of it in my fur I had a mohawk. Mummy burst out laughing every time she looked at me. I was quite offended.

I'm COTD!

I've been feeling a bit stressed lately, and because we're out of Feliway it's been endless pawsicuffs around here. Mummy says she's going to change my name to Banjo because the others are always picking on me.
I sit on top of the Funky Hollow minding my own business, and Orkney keeps attacking me. She says I hog the hollow and I should let her have a turn on the top spot, then she gets all beastly when I won't let her shove me off. So I was really cheered up to see that Catster chose me, poor little put-upon Bunty, as COTD! Thanks for the honour HQ!

Thank You to my Friends Old and New

I got so much lovin' yesterday from my friends and some cats I hadn't even met, 'cause I was COTD. Thank you all, I feel very honoured!
All the way from Yorkshire, our lovely friends, Alfie and family, a crown
From the pawesome Lily, Oreo (the PEA queen, MOL!)and the crew, a diamond
From Chai Latte and the terrific tabbies Little Bit and Sugar Bear, a furever star
From our dear friends Karma Kitty, Punkin Pooh, Shelley Sue, Bobbi Boi and Charlie Clarence, a crown and a big, big, trophy
From the inimitable Texans Arty, Sashay and Rockefeller, a furever star
From the adorable and very clever Twixy, a crown
From dear little Muppet, a crown
From Beepers and family, who know that my sisfurs bug me, a bug!
From our wonderful TKC co-chefs Sassy and Pepper, a pink rosette
From Playful the Empuress (Wish I was an Empuress too!), a rose
From our new friend Serena, a heart
From morris, Patches, Cody and family, a blue rosette
From Mugsy, a a big pink cuppycake
From the dynamic duo Teebo and Callie, a great big trophy
And Pmails and friend requests as well! I WILL thank mew all pursonally...except for Anonymous, who sent me the sunflower, MOL! Thanks Anonymous!