Dog Action

I can't believe Mummy - she had people over today and one of them brought one of those pants-sniffers! Into My house! What a cheek, it ate out of our bowls and drank our water. They said it was a Toy Poodle. I thought about using it as a squeaky toy, but decided that was beneath my dignity, so I stayed outside. Poor Tara, Bunty and Zephyr were trapped inside with it. Luckily they had the good sense to hide. Mummy tried to introduce Bunty to it. Mummy is now nursing a big scratch on her arm, serves her right.

Payback time

Poor Mummy, she woke up this morning to find hacked-up furballs all over the carpet, and someone had also...well, done something not good on Mummy's desk. But no-one can blame me because I was outside mousing all night. I bet the furballs are Tara's, or maybe Barfing Bunty's. As for the desk - well, Bunty is the number one suspect. Mummy says it's very suspicious that Bunty was not on the bed when she woke up. Bunty ALWAYS sleeps on Mummy's bed.
Maybe it was payback for the poodle episode. Still, I'm very cross with Bunty because I brought up my children to use the litter tray, not Mummy's papers.

Speaking of payback, Zephyr is also nursing some scratches on her face today. She has to understand that I am the Alpha Cat. Don't mess with the Baby-Faced Assassin!

The Mystery of the Red MG

Mummy says little catty paw prints have been found on next door's red MG! We say we're not guilty, we wouldn't go over there because of the DOGS. Apparently they are going to call in the wonders of forensic science and compare the paw prints to our paws to see if we are guilty. My number one suspect would be the huge tom who came around about six months ago and nearly crushed my skull in his jaws. He has had it in for me since I moved here as a tiny kitten. He is jealous of our nice house and our wonderful Mummy.
Mummy is not fully convinced of our innocence, I can tell... Tara is off the hook as she seldom goes past the front door, and Zephyr is unlikely to drag her stomach that far. Arrow is so scared of dogs she spent all day stuck on the top shelf in the shed last week, too frightened to come down, so she isn't on top of the suspect list either. As for me and the Buntster, well, let's see if forensic science can absolve us of all blame!

The Crime Wave Continues

No, I'm not referring to the night when the Jack Russell next door woke Mummy up yelping at 2.30 am...and when she looked out she saw me sauntering in from the direction of next door's garage, where he keeps that shiny red MG he loves so much, the one he found little catty paw prints on. Forensics were not able to make a match, thank g - er, unfortunately.

These latest crimes are wicked! Slumbering chickens, cruelly taken from their beds by the evildoer they call...."the Fox". Arrow claims not to have seen or heard anything, she was asleep in the shed as usual. The rest of us were inside hogging Mummy's bed, leaving her a good three inches on the very edge, jeepers I don't know why she says she wants more space, but that's another story.

Anyway, the cheek of this villain knows no bounds. Two more chooks taken several nights after the first crime, while the Jack Russell nearly burst his seams barking! (Bit of a hypocrite, that dog, seeing as he once pulled a chook apart just to see what it was made out of. Chicken of course, you dopey dog!)

I'll keep you posted....

Washed out!

It has been raining and raining here. Yesterday there was water pouring in the kitchen window! Mummy doesn't have any firewood so we have to snuggle up (purr, purr). Even Arrow has been spending a lot of time inside, and she's such an outdoorsy cat, except when she's sooking all over Mummy.
The Fox has been foiled, they have fixed a floor to the chook pen so he can't get up under there to steal the chooks. We all sleep a lot easier in our beds now.
Mummy has got us something for Christmas, I'm sure... I wonder what it is?

Boxing Day Thoughts

It's Boxing Day now, and we have had a lovely Christmas. Santa Claws brought us some catnip toys and Mummy got us some nice tins of Dine in our favourite flavour, and we had some turkey! And of course I licked all the bowls on the bench when Mummy wasn't looking.
Now I would like to purr a prayer for all the homeless kitties who are not as fortunate as us and hope that they find a furever home where they can be loved as much as we are.
I also want to purr a prayer for kitties who have been mistreated. It is a sad fact that some humans are mean to cats. Sometimes this is ignorance and we can hope for these people to learn and be enlightened about what wonderful loving friends we can be to the human race.
Well, that's enough profundity from the Orkster for today. I have had a lovely roll in the dust outside so my white bits are all grey, and now I am going to have a snooze on the mat at the front door.
Peace and tranquillity to all.
Zzzzzz.......

A Dog Free Zone!

Happy New Year everbody. I have made a resolution not to annoy Tara so much, and so far I have kept it (because it's too hot to bother). In fact Tara has been walking up and down in front of me inciting me to riot all afternoon, and I have nobly resisted all temptation.
Next door people have gone away, and they have taken the dogs with them. I don't like dogs much (except my Dogster friend AJ who sent me a beautiful star - he is so COOL.)
So the whole property is currently a dog-free zone, and we can wander where we like! I might pop over next door later and see if I can get into the garage and have a little snooze on the red MG - MOL!

Not a Good Day.

Yesterday was so hot, and Mummy got up early and started to remove all the furniture from the house. Arrow stayed in the shed the whole time. Zephyr thought maybe we were moving and ran into the walk-in wardrobe. Tara hid in her cardboard box until Mummy took it outside as well, so Tara dived into the bottom of the linen cupboard with Bunty. They both watched in horror as a strange man came in with a big steaming metal stick and started to rub it over the carpet. Tara fled into the front bedroom crying. I mean, I know she's a wuss but even I felt sorry for her. The man followed her with the stick and a big bottle of water he kept using to spray around the floor so she jumped up again and ran outside. I've never seen her do that! She hid amongst the furniture for hours on the patio, getting hotter and hotter. It was 41 degrees Celsius. Mummy tried to coax Tara out but she ran into the cat house that the nice man next door built for us and crouched in there for hours!
I did a few inspections (raided the food bowls) and the house was still kind of empty, although Mummy's bed was back so I figured nobody was moving. It was a warm night so I went up to the front gate with the rest of the girls and hung out where we can't usually go because of the DOGS owned by the people next door.
Then - wouldn't you know it - a car pulled up at the gate. And there they were, slobbering at the window. The dogs, I mean, not the humans. THE DOGS ARE BACK!

Busted

Mummy can't leave well enough alone. She HAD to fiddle with the computer last night and now she's broken it. It just keeps coming up with the Blue Screen of Death every time she tries to boot up. I told her she had to transcribe my diary entry while she is at work earning money to buy us cat food. Although she said after she discovered cat barf on the kitchen bench this morning that she is re-thinking the whole cat food issue....it wasn't me, honestly, was it, BUNTY?
Things are pretty quiet at home, but Zephyr is starting to worry me, she keeps playing with the catnip toys all the time, and believe me she is one cat who doesn't need any encouragement to roll around and look goofy.

Busted And Broken!

Mummy has got the computer going again, now it's my turn to break something. I broke my New Year's Resolution not to annoy Tara. I couldn't help myself. Ever since Tara was terrorised by the carpet cleaner and spent the day outside, she has had tickets on herself. She marches around the house going meow, meow, prrgung, brrr, meow. She even used our litter tray. It drove me nuts! Last night she was on the computer desk, weaving around so I came out from behind the sofa and fixed her with the most evil stare I have at my command, the Baby-Faced Assassin Death Ray. She went grrr at me and bolted for safety with me in hot pursuit.
Boy, did that feel good!