The Felines of New York website has one honorable goal: “To photograph the cats of the best city on earth, and put their thoughts on record.” Originally conceived as a parody to the Humans of New York, the site pairs slick photographs of cats living in the city with commentary that has them musing on cramped apartment life, stressful situations in the great metropolis, and the cost of day-to-day Big Apple living. We’ve plucked some of our favorite entries for you to check out below — then be sure to head over to the site to peruse the best of the rest.
“I was a percussionist in a pretty successful jam band. We had a record deal and everything.”
“I need a break from the city. Maybe like, a hiking trip or something would be nice. Like down the sidewalk, or over to where the trees are, just a day trip. I wouldn’t pack snacks or anything, I’d just eat the bugs I find. You have to do that sort of thing once in a while when you live here.”
— Mike (available for adoption!)
“I’d like to own a real home one day. Something bigger than this two-bedroom carpeted thing.”
“I’m really looking forward to the summer, I want to get out of the city and hit the beach for a few days.”
“Do you like the water?”
“No, I won’t go near the water. I’ll just stay on the litter box part.”
“This is where the lady keeps the good food. I’ve been trying to open it for years.”
“Rent is crazy expensive here in New York. I mean, that has zero effect on me since I’m a cat and have no real concept of currency. But still, it sounds like a lot of people are upset over it. Being a human seems pretty frustrating in general.”
— Hilary (available for adoption!)
“The higher up you go, the safer you are. You can see things and you can pounce better if you have to. My dad taught me that. Or maybe it was my uncle. They looked very much alike.”
— Bash (also available for adoption!)
“I love New York when the weather warms up. Everyone’s a lot nicer. For about a week.”
— Ranger (yep, this one’s up for grabs too!)
If you live in New York City and have a cat you’d like to see featured on Felines of New York, you can apply here.
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About Phillip Mlynar: The self-appointed world’s foremost expert on rappers’ cats. When not penning posts on rap music, he can be found building DIY cat towers for his adopted domestic shorthair, Mimosa, and collecting Le Creuset cookware (in red). He has also invented cat sushi, but it’s not quite what you think it is.