I Talk to My Cats While They Sleep, With Varied Results


Cats enjoy their sleep, and they just love it when we talk to them while they’re trying to catch some Zs. Yeah, that last part is fairly dripping with sarcasm — you got that, right? Silly question — of course you did. The truth is, they usually want to be left alone when they’re napping … unless there’s some sort of food involved, and then they spring to life, full of rocket fuel and eyes darting for the aforementioned consumable. I can’t really talk, though, because I’m sort of the same way when it comes to snacks.

Sometimes, just to harass my cats in a good-natured way, I call their names or chat with them while they’re napping. Their responses vary, but never fail to amuse me. I thought I’d capture some of this harassment on Vine and share it with you — because watching cats getting harassed (again, in a good-natured way) while they’re sleeping is some fine entertainment. Hey — they seem to have no problem bugging us while we’re sleeping, right? Fair play, my feline friends! I have absolutely no guilt over any of this.

Note: For sound, click on the bottom right speaker on the Vine videos.

1. Saffy

Saffy’s my No. 1 napping customer. She’s 13 years old and spends a good part of the day sawing logs. When I call her name or talk to her, she barely opens her eyes and then starts purring. She’s a sweet little dreamer, but doesn’t care much for giving me the whole eyeball of attention. The partial eyeball scopes the scene, checks for any food or catnip situations, and then closes and tries to appease me with her kitty motor. It’s OK — the kitty motor does appease me. I’m pretty easy that way.

2. Cosmo

Cosmo’s typically a hard sleeper, but a total Mama’s boy, so he perks up a little when he hears my voice. I’ll usually get an ear twitch and his body will shift a around a bit. He sometimes awakes for a few seconds to make sure he’s not missing anything important, and then blows me off again. He knows I’ll be back later for additional harassment, and maybe I’ll have treats during the next visit. He’s mostly right.

What I love best about watching the Cosmo scenario is the whisker and ear-hair action. Both are bright white and stand out beautifully against his dark fur. There’s always a lot of expression in the whiskers and ears, and it’s especially noticeable with the Cos. “I love you. Admire me. Now be gone.” He’s pretty direct.

3. Phoebe

Oh, Phoebe. She’s a sassy little one. For a kitty with such a little body, she sure does throw around some heavy attitude. And do you think she gives one rip about what I want? Nope. She’s gonna do exactly what she wants to do every single time. This holds true even when she’s sleeping. I can talk and talk all day long, but she couldn’t care less. Sometimes she doesn’t even budge if snacks are involved. That’s right, she’s a freaky little weirdo … but an awfully cute one.

In true Phoebe form, here she is offering minuscule effort and attention when I speak to her sleeping self. Sure, I’ll get a mild cock of an ear and sometimes a “leave me alone” squeak, but mostly she pretends like I’m not even in her immediate space.

How do your cats react when you talk to them while they’re sleeping? Tell us about it in the comments!

Read more by Angie Bailey:

About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (originated right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.

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