When daylight saving time rolls around, we humans begin to plot and plan all the fun things we’ll do with that extra hour of daylight. Cats are totally in tune with our schedule and would definitely know there’s an extra hour in there. They’d, of course, ask the question cats have asked since the beginning of time: “What’s in it for me?” Here are 10 things cats would do with their extra hour.
1. Stare at us
Cats are always wondering what we humans are up to. Is it because they’re judging us or is it because they’re waiting to see if we make a move to the kitchen, where the treats and food live? The short answer: yes.
2. Stare at nothing
As much as cats enjoy keeping their eyes on us, they can’t seem to get enough of staring in general. It’s almost like a sport to them, and they’d all receive gold medals. Sometimes their eyes are locked onto an empty wall, and other times they’re looking straight ahead into … nothing?
3. Strategize additional treat-seeking methods
Cats could grow tired of the same old approach to asking for treats. Circling around our legs as we walk into the kitchen might have lost its luster, and the humans have probably grown immune to this age-old strategy. Perhaps there are more creative ways to seek the almighty treat. They’d have some serious thinking to do. Maybe staring at a wall would help.
4. Wait for food to fall from the sky
It’s true: Sometimes food falls right from the sky. It usually happens in the kitchen or dining room, but it’s pure magic. Kitties are ready for an extra hour of that kind of magic.
5 . Practice their “resting aloof face.”
As if they need the practice.
6. Take inventory
Cats are constantly taking mental inventory of what’s on the kitchen counter, the dresser, the coffee table — all the interesting places that hold “things.” This is because, at any given moment, one of those items could be of use to him. “Oh, I remember that tube of Chapstick on top of the dresser. I wonder how far under the sofa I can swat it this time.”
7. Pursue advanced ninja certification
Kitties like to think they’re awesome in the art of hiding and surprise pouncing. The truth is that they can be the best-worst hiders ever. They think they’re totally concealed, yet we see a tail sticking out from underneath the curtain or a giant lump beneath a blanket. They’d like to think they’d go after an advanced ninja certification, but they probably need to go back to Ninja 101.
8. Take extra baths
Can a cat really have too many baths? Silly question. A kitty would certainly welcome extra time to chew his toes and clean his rear — probably during the fancy brunch we’re hosting.
9. Create litter box art
Cats are masters at digging holes in their litter boxes and sometimes create the most interesting 3D designs in the litter. Ever the imaginative creatures, they might take the extra hour to hone their art and create masterpieces using their favorite medium. Of course, the art would disappear after the next visit to the box, but that’s what makes each creation so rare and beautiful.
Thumbnail: Photography ©Dmytro Skorobogatov | Getty Images.
Angie Bailey, an award-winning writer, podcaster and humorist, is the author of Texts From Mittens and creator of the Paws Rewind: Gen X + Cats podcast.
Editor’s note: This article originally appeared in Catster magazine. Have you seen the new Catster print magazine in stores? Or in the waiting area of your vet’s office? Click here to subscribe to Catster and get the bimonthly magazine delivered to your home.
Read more humor on Catster.com:
- Short, Funny Cat Jokes
- Stella the Cat Weighs in on Cat Superstitions
- Interview with Stella the Cat: Discovering How Old She Really Is
- 1 1. Stare at us
- 2 2. Stare at nothing
- 3 3. Strategize additional treat-seeking methods
- 4 4. Wait for food to fall from the sky
- 5 5 . Practice their “resting aloof face.”
- 6 6. Take inventory
- 7 7. Pursue advanced ninja certification
- 8 8. Take extra baths
- 9 9. Create litter box art
- 10 10. Sleep
- 11 About the author
- 12 Read more humor on Catster.com: