Sorry 'bout the Dog Smell, Folks. Ready for a Smackdown?
Hey evrybuddy, Skeezix here.
I spent most of the weekend kleening up all the DROOL the Dogsters left behind when they invaded The Cat's Meow last week. And I still haven't qwite got the dog smell out of the blog, so I apolojize for the odiferussness.
As you may or mayn't know, Jake, the Dogster blog dog, rote a scathing post about all the cats who went over and rote "Cats Rool, Dogs Drool" on the Dogster blog (wich we did as a response to the ridikulous pole that claimed that dogs are more pawpular pets than cats). I was just gonna let Jake's screed go unansered, cuz hoo cares what a bunch of drooly, poop-eatin' dogs think, right?
But the bottom line is, Jake dissed me and my reeders. So I think it's time for a smakdown. I've highlited Jake's comments, then rebutted them below.
A cat named Skeezix, who is Catsters main man (the equivalent of my role at Dogster, only more prone to giving people allergies...
Jake, you could use a fakt chekker. I'm a hypoallergenic breed (Oriental Shorthair). Nobuddy's allerjik to me.
But Skeezix needs to heed his spell check. Oh I forgot; cats are independent sorts who listen to nothing and no one not even easy-to-use computer functions that would prevent paragraphs like, So thare yoo have it. I think Ive purrvided incontrovertible evidense that peepul like cats better than dogs. Its no contest, reely. Actually, come to think of it, he spells no worse than a lot of people who write on the internet. So never mind that argument. Sorry Skeez.
Ha, the joke's on you, Jake!
Ferstly, you seem to be unaware that I have compeeted in the Nashunul Spellin Bee under the tootelidge of my spellin coach, da grate Jeter Harris, THREE TIMES. Wich is three times more than you have, my frend.
Secondly, I use spellchek reelijussly. It werks reel good and underlines all my werds in red for me, as if to say, "Attaboy, Skeez'! Good spellin job!" Or, in LOLcat-speak: Spellin. Yer doin it rite.
Yes, cats have invaded Dogster. They have crossed the -ster line. Their little sneaky selves with their snaky tails have stalked their way into the land of happy dogs.
OK. Here are a few tales. Some are snaky, some are not. Hmmm, it seems that more dogs than cats have snaky tales:
And sum dog tales are just plane weird:
Many cats, on the other paw, have gorgeous, floofy tales that would never be confused for snakes:
Snakey taled? I think not.
Now Jake, I know you berned out both of yer brane cells thinking of ways to proove that dogs are superior. It was an admirable (if flawed) effert. So let's just call a troose and agree that cat owners just have higher expectations of their pets, wile dog owners are less discriminant and enjoy cohabitating with drooly poop-eating sycophants.