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Sing along with the lyrics below:

The Kitty Pedicure Song
By Sarah Donner

When I jump upon your lap, you begin to scream
There are tiny spots upon your leg where you are bleeding
Then you chase me down the hall and say it’s all my fault
It’s just how I ask politely, “Can I get a pedicure?”

Hold tight, grab my paw
Gently clip my little claw
Without them I’d be defenseless
Sorry for the pain and bloodshed

Get a friend to help you and then wrap me in a towel
Do not be offended if I struggle, and I start to howl
Grab my foot and pinch it to extend the pointy tip
Trim them with the clippers but be careful of the quick!

Hold tight, just be brave
Accept that there’s furniture you just can’t save
I’m important, and you love me
When you have cats, you can’t have nice things

Some notes from Sarah: I forgot to mention that you only really need to clip your kitty’s front claws. The rear claws don’t really endanger your antique chaise longue or your face. Sometimes it’s helpful to wait until your kitty is in a chill mood before you clip. You should also give positive reinforcement, like treats, when you are finished.

Thanks to catscratching.com for some of the technical information. Also special thanks to kitties Pancakes and Rory for putting up with my shenanigans. Send your questions to me at sarah AT sarahdonner DOT com or comment below!