— Mittens gets stuck in a pant leg, Drunk Patty wants a feral squirrel to ride in the cat carrier, and Mittens is falsely accused of theft! He texts!
— A Chinese restaurant in Hong Kong serves dishes in the famous cat's image; we're booking a flight.
— Tamagotchi? Answering machines? Fruit by the Foot? Our '90s cat takes a fond look back.
— Bad birds plot to get Mittens, mice drive him under the bed, and he's half blind. He must text!
— Using a fashion site I transform us into Katy Perry, Rihanna, and more, with ridiculously fun results.
— FURminator joined some YouTube creators to make these funny videos about a serious topic.
— I call my cats dozens of nicknames: I bet they call me "Clump Hustler" and "Door Cop." Yikes!
— Mittens can't figure out how to text the IRS, Drunk Patty makes situations worse, and Stumpy wants Mittens to be a gangster. Mitty texts all about it!
— A couch, some Orioles, and a three-hour nap -- er, I mean, game; how can cats not love baseball?
— After you read about Mittens facing the confusing horrors of Drunk Patty's tube tops, enter to win a copy of the new "Texts From Mittens" book.
— In scooping poop, cat owners are way better off than dog owners, and that's reason to celebrate.
— The designer praised his cat so thoroughly in an interview, we decided to present it as a pop song.
— Catnip is totally safe for your cats -- and it makes their antics even more hilarious than usual.
— The famed rescue (and full-service landscaper) wants a pet rock in every home (or flowerbed).
— The slab threatens him, the driftwood is a gossip, and Mom deflates his new hobby. Rock texts!
— Diet treats? Embarrassing photos? Drunk Patty's underwear? Mittens has no shortage of St. Paddy's Day atrocities to report, so he texts!
— If you believe cats don't celebrate St. Patrick's Day ... well, you're really not that far off.
— Q: How do cats celebrate St. Patrick's Day? A: With really bad poetry!
— We risk our personal safety by rousing a cat to ask his feelings about National Napping Day.
— St. Patrick's Day looms; Leprechauns will eat Mittens, Mom's greedy with the gold, and the dog's asleep on clean laundry. See the texts!
— In honor of If Pets Had Thumbs Day, we show you why you do NOT want your cat to have thumbs.
— We chat with a cat about the theory that cats created everything. We're pretty sure they did.
— Kittens in cloaks, dashing through the forest, killing people. Your cat needs to watch this.
— Drunk Patty celebrates National Drink Wine Day and Mittens has a dog-germ infection. So he texts!
— Who says cats in New Orleans don't celebrate on Fat Tuesday? Hear what one has to say.
— You haven’t really heard "We Are the World" until you’ve heard a professional singer meow it, using a different, pitch-perfect cat voice for each star.
— Oh, you really screwed the pooch on this one, didn't you? Better buy extra chocolates.
— V-Day approaches, and Mittens worries over his date with Fiona, unwelcome gifts, and Drunk Patty's meatloaf. He texts!
— Shutterstock's pictures of hearts, chocolates, and cats lead us on a trip into the Twilight Zone.
— Mom's useless when it comes to helping Mitty play Trivia Crack, and she's ungrateful about his intervention regarding her dating life. So, he texts!
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