If the Licki Kickstarter hadn’t already raised nearly $7,000 in just a handful of days, we’d have a hard time believing it wasn’t a prank. The campaign is, after all, for a silicone tongue you stick in your mouth so you can lick your cat. (That bears repeating.) It’s for a silicone tongue you stick in your mouth so you can lick your cat.
It seems to assume that you’d want to lick your cat. (One of our writers licked her cat as a teaching method — long story — and after doing so admitted that it was fabulously unpleasant.) It implies that awkwardly smooshing a giant silicone tongue against your kitty and dragging it around is an activity that you’d do repeatedly for mutual enjoyment and not just once or twice on a dare.
It seems to forget that the world recoiled in horror at the My Strange Addiction episode where 43-year-old Lisa was addicted to licking her cat and eating clumps of his hair. It makes no mention of the provocative shape of the device, which looks like it would be right at home hanging among other silicone protrusions at a sex shop (which are fine … BUT CATS!), nor does it shout from the rooftops that you should definitely close your windows and lock your doors before you stick it in your mouth and reach for your cat.
I mean, look at this guy. Imagine if his mom just happened to be stepping onto the porch to bring him a meatloaf:
Setting aside all that, the Licki looks pretty cool, even if it is large and silicone and will probably be experimented with in various ways by the adult film industry. According to the Kickstarter page, “licking your cat with Licki is an oddly meditative practice, soothing for … you and your cat,” and it says that using it will help “develop a deeper relationship with your cat,” which is something we can get behind, silicone tongue in our mouths and all.
So far, nearly 300 people have backed the project, which has almost $7,000 of its $36,500 goal, with just more than a month to go. People are clearly interested. Perhaps what’s attracting them is this soothing passage, which describes in loving detail how to use the Licki:
Gently grasp Licki’s bite portion with your teeth, slowly approach your cat when she is sleeping or in an otherwise pleasant mood, and ease into the soothing and mutually beneficial licking behavior of cats. Don’t be surprised if your cat licks you back.
The Kickstarter page also says: “Invite your friends and their cats over for Licki parties.”
Again, we don’t think this is a joke. But just imagine inviting your friends over for a LICKI party and sitting around and doing this:
Godspeed, LICKI. Let’s hope the remaining $25,000 comes easily, and we’ll see you on the other side.