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Texts from Mittens: The Seasonal Injustice Edition

Mitty's best friend is housebound, a found cheeseburger is off limits, and Drunk Patty's pet turtle is truly talentless. He texts!

Angie Bailey  |  Jan 20th 2016


Winter is here, and Mittens couldn’t feel more agitated. His best friend Stumpy, an indoor-outdoor cat, isn’t allowed to venture outdoors when it’s too cold, so he can’t come over. Although Mom assures Mitty this is only for Stumpy’s safety, he can’t hold back his frustration. Spring can’t come quickly enough!

On top of that stress, add Mom’s refusal to let Earl and Mitty share a cheeseburger. They rightfully found it, after all — who cares about its origin! Moms can be such buzzkills.

Oh, and Drunk Patty swears her pet turtle can do tricks. Mittens is pretty sure she’s hallucinating because he sees nothing. Even Earl can do tricks. Geez.

Let’s check in on all the hairy details of our pal Mitty’s latest “tragedies.”

winter-1

cheeseburger

"Mother Nature hates me."

“Mother Nature hates me.”

winter-2

dirty-foot

"I'll have to hide my dirty foot! The shame!"

“I’ll have to hide my dirty foot! The shame!”

winter-3

drunk-patty-turtle

"I have no time for tricks."

“I have no time for tricks.”

winter-4

felt-rhino

 

 

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About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (originated right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to feed them.