I love kitty bodies. I adore the fuzzy bellies, smooth snouts and perfect pawpads. And then there are the ears. Oh, man — I love a kitty ear. When one of my cats is curled up in my lap, I can’t keep my hands off of his silky little ears. I probably have an unhealthy obsession with feline ears, but I suspect many of you do as well. Admit it.
Here are five obsessive little things I like to do with my cats’ ears.
My go-to preoccupation is gently rubbing the silken ear between my thumb and forefinger. My cats love it — it’s like a mini massage. I’ll rub their ears when I’m watching TV, and they melt into my lap. To me, rubbing silky kitty ears is meditative. Who needs worry stones when you have kitty ears?
You know that soft-as-a-bunny fur that lives behind cats’ ears? Yeah, you know what I mean because you worship it as much as I do. It feels so luxurious and fragile that I try to touch it very lightly. I want to take a nap inside those little patches of fluff.
Yes, that’s right: I nibble my cats’ ears, but not with my teeth. I nom-nom-nom those ears with my lips. And I actually say “nom, nom, nom” while I’m doing it. The ears are just so perfect, I want to eat them — not in a gross, cannibalistic way, but in the same way I used to want to eat my babies’ little toes. Nom nom nom.
Sometimes I smooth my cat’s ears back and then let go and watch them pop back up into place. I have no idea why this amuses me, but it does. And when I have the ears smoothed all the way back, I say, “rat face!” because, well, he looks like a giant rat — a giant, gorgeous rat whose ears I like to nibble.
Sometimes when cats clean themselves their ears accidentally become flipped inside out. Now and again, I flip an ear simply for my own entertainment. Here’s why I like the inside-out look: First of all, they look completely silly. Cats like to think they are these dignified, pulled-together, fancy-pants beings, so when something is out of place, it’s extra funny. It’s like the Queen of England coming out of the bathroom with her skirt tucked into her pantyhose.
Another advantage to the flip-flop ear is the exposure to the bristly hairs that lie inside and just in front of the kitty ear. I enjoy rubbing just the top of those hairs. I feel like it should tickle my cat when I do that, but it doesn’t seem to bother him at all. And I’m glad, because I don’t want to stop anytime soon.
Are you obsessive about your cat’s ears? Let us know in the comments!
Let Catster make you laugh:
Read more by Angie Bailey:
About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (birthed right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.
Our Most-Commented Stories