A couple of years ago I wrote about some of the nicknames my cats have amassed over the years — there were quite a few. I would never have guessed that in two years they would have collected quite a few more, but it’s true. I rarely call my cats by their given names, anyway. The only time I stick to their real names is when I’m writing about them.
Here are more of the seemingly endless nicknames my family has given our cats.
Saffy’s our big gray girl, although she’s not so big anymore since her doctor-recommended diet change. She is, however, still the Queen of Fluff, so she looks bigger than she actually is. Once we had to bathe her and when she was wet, she looked rather small. Fluff: It’s a funny thing.
Here are some of Saffy’s newer nicknames:
Madge — This is a spinoff of her older nicknames, Marge and Margaret. It just slipped out of my mouth one day, and I decided it was a keeper. It’s funny, isn’t it? Say it: Madge. It’s sassy, but also kind of housewife-y. Remember that dishwasher soap commercial where Madge made everyone soak their hands in Palmolive? “You’re soaking in it!” Maaaaadddggge!
Piggy — Saffy’s a total chow hound when it comes to food. Just this morning I watched her suck up her breakfast like a fluffy Hoover and then her head snapped around to see if the other cats were still eating their food. Because she’s all about standing behind them while they eat and then swooping in for the leftovers.
Pretty — Aside from being a little piggy, she’s absolutely stunning. She’s a gorgeous cat. Sometimes I just call her Pretty. It fits, especially if she’s posing.
Cosmo is my boy. That tuxie follows me everywhere, and I love it. And when he’s not following me, he’s either in my lap or staring at me.
Here are some of Cosmo’s recent nicknames:
Russell — My daughter and I named him this because he looks like a Russell, if you can at all understand what I mean. Plus, when he sleeps under the covers with me, he rustles all night long. His legs twitch and he’s always moving positions.
Mr. Montgomery — One of my friends recently revived this name. At one time, Cosmo had a Facebook page and his name was Cosmo Montgomery because it sounds fancy and he does wear a tuxedo, after all. Sometimes we pull out the old Mr. Montgomery, and it always makes me laugh.
Friend — I call him this sometimes because, well, he’s my friend. He’s probably the one who spends the greatest amount of time with me, and he’s a solid companion.
Phoebe is our little loud-mouthed busybody. She’s tiny, fast and into everything. She’s probably the one who’s most often called by her nicknames.
Here are three of them:
Liesl — This one has a couple of origins. My daughter’s always called Phoebe Weasel, so Liesl was an easy choice — I like rhymes. I also sometimes call her Cheesl. Also, I once saw this photo of dogs dressed up in doctor and nurse costumes, and the one dog was called Nurse Liesl. That amused me to no end, so when I had a chance to use that name, I snapped it up.
Tater — This was originally Tater Tot because she’s so little. Now, my daughter pretty much exclusively calls her Tater.
Kitten — Because she’s so little, I still think of her as a kitten. When she’s snuggled up in my lap, I like to call her Kitten because it sounds sweet and affectionate.
What are your cat’s nicknames? Tell us in the comments!
Let Catster make you laugh:
Read more by Angie Bailey:
About the Author: Angie Bailey is an eternal optimist with an adoration of all things silly. Loves pre-adolescent boy humor, puns, making up parody songs, thinking about cats doing people things and The Smiths. Writes Catladyland, a cat humor blog, Texts from Mittens (birthed right here on Catster) and authored whiskerslist: the kitty classifieds, a silly book about cats wheeling and dealing online. Partner in a production company and writes and acts in comedy web series that features sketches and mockumentaries. Mother to two humans and three cats, all of which want her to make them food.